having a third child

summerlou

myself and my husband would love another a child we all ready have two a girl age 10 and a boy age 5 our parents thing we should be happy with what we have.and the age gap would be to big also alot of friends of ours our telling us from two children to three is an enourmous shock and a lot of hard work any views on this would be great many thanks

sarymclary

I don't agree that it's a shock at all. The shock is becoming a parent to begin with, the rest is just down to practice. By the time I had my 3rd I was a dab hand at the parenting bit, and could really enjoy the new baby. It was also lovely to see how excited the older children were about having a new sibling, and how they liked to get involved caring for him. I got a bit carried away with it, and had a 4th!

There's a 6 & 4 yr age gap between DS1/2 and DS3. They were 8 & 6 when DS4 was born.

I think if you and your husband want to have another child, that is the main thing, and I am sure it will be great!

ChasingButterflies

Hi there,

By the time our third child came along our eldest was just about to turn 4 - So our house has been very hectic at times!

dd1 is now 8, ds1 6 and dd2 4 and we are now baking number 4. This is actually the most "planned" arrival we will have. My Dad thinks we should have stopped at 3, mil and fil think we should have stopped at 2 :rolleyes: We felt we wanted one more...

At the end of the day what you and your husband feel is the most important thing - you both agree. The chaos tends to come with equal amounts of rewarding moments.

All the best!

inamess200

Hi

Our DS now aged 3 was a big suprise my daughters were then aged 8 and 4 and it was no bother at all the girls loved helping with their little brother and as they are at school you get to spend more time with the third - at times I felt guilty for spending soo much time with him where as DD2 didn't get as much as there was a toddler running round as well.

If you want a 3rd go for it - it was one of the best things we have done

summerlou

thankyou for your replys we are going to try as im so broody i can still remeber the pain otherwise it wouldnt of been a big age gap my husband says no pain no gain lol thank you again for you views.

laineyc_2

I did find it a bit more difficult from 2 to 3 but the age gap was less than 2 years between my youngest and the baby. You soon learn to get organised. When we went from 3 to 4 didn't make much difference.

makingdo

I have a 3.9 year old, 2 and a half year old and a three and a half month old. I havent found it any harder. I think i would have done had i had older children, it would have been a bit of a shock going back to the baby stage. Thats it for me now though...no more!

LISSILEIGH

i agree with sarymclary, the shock is having your first!!.

i have three children and my youngest daughter was born 2 days after my eldest was 4, it is hard work being a parent but well worth it, my youngest will be 3 in a couple of weeks and my eldest 7.

i would love another but my husband has told me no

Becles

I had a third baby when my boys were 10 and 8.

It was odd going back to the feeding and nappy stage, but I soon got back into the swing of things!

The pro's of having older ones and a baby is that they are not so dependant on you - ie they can wash and dress themselves, make their own breakfast, clear up after themselves, etc. I found it easier than what I imagine it must be like if you have three little people to wash and dress in a morning.

The bigger ones look after the little one. They'll take her and play with her when I'm cooking tea, so she's not under my feet in the kitchen, or they watch her for a couple of minutes so I don't have to drag her up to the loo, answer the door/phone etc.

The downsides are that nothing is designed for 5! We've booked a holiday and had to get two three bed rooms as we couldn't get a 5 bed room in the resort we're visiting. You never see a recipe to feed 5 so you need to either do some maths, or add extras to eek a recipe for 4 round 5 plates. Ready made foods like frozen pies or battered fish fillets never come in 5's, so you have to buy two boxes and save the remainder for a future meal.

Also check your car if you have one. My old one wouldn't have fitted two children and a baby seat in the back, so I had to buy a bigger model. I was planning on changing the car anyway as the old one was dropping to bits, so it wasn't a great hardship. Even in the bigger car, it's still a bit of a squash in the back.

Overall she's brought so much love and pleasure into our lives. I'm so glad we were lucky enough to have her.

B2B-2008

I would just like to say that my brother is ten years older than me and I don't find that age gap a problem. I think we get on better than brothers and sisters that are quite close in age.

I did become an aunt at 9 which was a bit weird but it made us all quite close. My niece is like a sister to me.

I really wouldn't worry about an age gap.

bestpud

Becles wrote: »

I had a third baby when my boys were 10 and 8.

It was odd going back to the feeding and nappy stage, but I soon got back into the swing of things!

The pro's of having older ones and a baby is that they are not so dependant on you - ie they can wash and dress themselves, make their own breakfast, clear up after themselves, etc. I found it easier than what I imagine it must be like if you have three little people to wash and dress in a morning.

The bigger ones look after the little one. They'll take her and play with her when I'm cooking tea, so she's not under my feet in the kitchen, or they watch her for a couple of minutes so I don't have to drag her up to the loo, answer the door/phone etc.

The downsides are that nothing is designed for 5! We've booked a holiday and had to get two three bed rooms as we couldn't get a 5 bed room in the resort we're visiting. You never see a recipe to feed 5 so you need to either do some maths, or add extras to eek a recipe for 4 round 5 plates. Ready made foods like frozen pies or battered fish fillets never come in 5's, so you have to buy two boxes and save the remainder for a future meal.

Also check your car if you have one. My old one wouldn't have fitted two children and a baby seat in the back, so I had to buy a bigger model. I was planning on changing the car anyway as the old one was dropping to bits, so it wasn't a great hardship. Even in the bigger car, it's still a bit of a squash in the back.

Overall she's brought so much love and pleasure into our lives. I'm so glad we were lucky enough to have her.

You have said almost exactly what I was about to post!

We have a similar age gap so I guess that does makes a difference.

I found it difficult to remember a changing bag etc, which was odd as I was the opposite with our older two- always had spare clothes and ample nappies etc. With the third, I was often caught short having forgotten wipes, or a spare vest, or whatever (even her pushchair a few times :rolleyes:)! Although I breast fed her so maybe having to remember the bottles jogged my memory with the other two?

I also found it difficult having to think before we left the house. With a 9 and 10 year old, you just get up and go, pretty much! They get themselves in the car, and grab their coat or whatever, but with a baby it takes more effort, and I'd completely got out of the habit of planning short trips to relatives, or town!

I second the car seat issue - we found that too.

And I second the holiday arrangements as well - it gets wayyyy more expensive when there are five of you! It will get worse when your eldest hits their teens as they can be termed an adult in many places and whereas you can find places to allow two children and a baby in a room, it is harder to get somewhere to accommodate three 'adults' and two children.

But I have noticed family tickets for parks and zoos etc tend to allow more children now - it used to be two adults and 2 children in many places so it's good they are changing it.

Oh gosh, and the food, yes - we found that too!

Overall, I found it a very big jump between 2 and 3.

I wouldn't change it for the world though, and I enjoy dd2 all the more now I know how quick they grow up!