Asking for money as a wedding gift

rlm_3

We went to a friend's wedding last year where they effectively asked for money but they did it in a really nice way.

They're planning to go travelling for a few months to South America, so they created a list of all the things they want to do (e.g., places they want see, journeys they need to take, items they need to purchase for the trip) and created a list detailing the cost of all of these. This way you felt that you were giving them an 'experience' rather than just cold, hard cash.

Mely

I could do with some money...lol..but myself and oh just couldnt bring ourselves to ask for money whichever way its worded etc. I guess its personal choice.

mrcow

Just ask for it politely. Most people getting married these days already have most things to set up home with already and asking for money or vouchers is not as rare as it used to be.


Whatever you do though.......


DON'T

write some annoying twee poem about it.

It's not clever
It's not cute
It's not polite
It's just really patronising.

ema_o

I have to agree, I am quite happy to give money as a wedding present but I hate being asked in a poem. I like Claire's suggestion of what to write, just say that what you would like most is dollars or money towards your honeymoon.

shelovestobuystuff

We would prefer money to pay for our honeymoon rather than gifts for the house but will be too embarassed to tell people that.We will ask them not to buy as any wedding gifts as we have everything we need already but I wouldnt ask for money straight out.

Alikay

We've given money as a gift for every wedding we've been to in the last 20 years, but we've never been asked for it. Most people aren't stupid: if there isn't a gift list they'll think for themselves and give you vouchers or a cheque. I hate those twee poems, and the idea of giving someone a wedge of cash to blow on a holiday is pretty ghastly too....I'd be thinking of all the useful things the money could go on rather than someone's Disney admission!

than4

I don't know if you can do it here, but in Australia some of the travel agents have a "honeymoon registry".
It's similar to a gift registry in that instead of buying a gift you contact the travel agent and pay off some of the couple's honeymoon.

Alternatively, I like the idea of the experiences list, where you list activites and people pay for or contribute towards an activity.
There is a site that we used for our wedidng freegiftregsitry.com.au where I think you can get people to contribute in other currencies and it can be paid to you by Paypal saving them bringing the cash on the day.
Some people won't like it, but some of our guests were really into it.

I think it's fine to ask for cash, but I would refrain from asking for it in US$. That just gives people more hassle (and reasons to complain) that they have had to change currency to get you a wedding gift.

LydiaSophia

I am going to take your advice and not ask for anything at all.

I emailed my sisters some poems and they didn't like them either.

Thank you for all your replies

x x

annie-c

I think you have to make the decision based on your own instincts

I hope you have the most fabulous day though and don't forget to prime your mum/sisters etc to suggest that cash would be welcomed to anyone who specifically asks for ideas - which is quite a different ballgame to making the request off your own bat xxxx

liza83_2

my df has wrote a poem for our invites asking for cash or vouchers see my invite post