The Giving Up Smoking Thread!! Part 2

TismE_3

Morning all x

Just popped in to say its day 13 for me:T

I have been fancying a fag for the last couple of days tbh, just now and again i'll get the feeling, but it passes, i wouldnt call it a craving as such, the thought just seems to pop into my head and then its gone again!

I have been really busy, we just got our first allotment, so im spending most of my free time down the lotty, its more of a waste ground at the moment. No one has tended it for almost 10 years! When i do get time to come on the site im usually loitering over on the green fingered money saving threads.

Got new leaf today, think he's going to tell me off for using my inhalator too much :rolleyes: which i do agree with, i am still using it a lot, but im not fagging it and thats the main thing. Might try using polos or chewing gums as a distraction. I did once quit for about 8 months using polo mints alone but that was in another life before i had kids!

Hope everyone has a great day!!

Stay strong :T

Tisme x

whathavewedone

Awww Stroppy and Ameleoriate, sorry to hear you've fallen off the wagon.

Stroppy, this was your longest quit wasn't it? Lots of people have to have a number of attempts before they finally quit, I'm sure that I'm just one of many.

Don't beat yourself up. It will probably take a while before you feel ready to quit again. When you do I think you should try a different approach. Some people do get more withdrawal symptoms than others and no amount of being told that it's all in the head will help. For me it made me even more :mad: .

For example I found hypnosis really helped to make me feel more determined but it didn't help with the dry mouth, headaches, constipation and irritability. The only thing that helped me with that was NRT and the only NRT that works for me is patches. The gum, lozenges and inhalator taste disgusting and give me mouth ulcers and trapped wind as well as reminding me of smoking.

So it's trial and error really and it may take a few more attempts before you manage it. Nothing will work though unless you're 100% committed. I wasn't that committed in September when I last tried to quit and so only lasted a few days. Nevertheless I cut down as a result of that attempt which made it easier to stop this time.

As for me I'm still going strong, the Kalms seem to be helping me sleep better. Have two enormous pulsating spots on my chin waiting to burst through the surface of my skin which I presume is due to all those toxins coming out, particularly since I've been off the high strength patches for 4 days now. Otherwise though my skin looks much better, brighter and much less dry.

I still find the evenings a little boring but do love being able to read bedtime stories and sing to the children without getting breathless which was starting to happen. I also like not sitting there willing the bedtime routines to be over asap so that I could on with lighting up...I still look forward to a glass of wine and some me time but it's not the same as that addict's desperation for it's fix.

ScRiMpNsAvE_2

It was only in my last days of smoking that I stopped to think about whether I was actually enjoying my cigarettes, or whether I’d convinced myself over time that I was as a way to justify it. I don’t consider myself a stupid person, however I struggled with how non-smokers could go without all day, not only without giving it a fleeting thought that they were missing out on anything, but that most were on the other end of the scale and would give me a dagger-stare or an amplified tut if even a wisp of smoke were to end up anywhere near them.

I thought through the process methodically; I’d wake up in the morning, feeling this insecurity that I couldn’t start the day without feeding the addiction, putting it first before anything else. There was so much build up, and when I actually got to light the thing, and inhale a lungful, breath it out, then…

Pfff…

“Did I enjoy that? Not sure, but certainly wasn’t bowled over. However, I’ll give it the benefit of the doubt and try again…”

Pfff…

“On second thoughts I don’t think I enjoyed that. But why else would I be doing it?”

Pfff…

“I’ve started so I’ll finish…”

By the time I got half way I realised that I certainly didn’t enjoy the experience. However, the distraction had gone and I could finally function as normal. That is until, of course, that nagging started once again. Loop back to start. I don't feel better after a cigarette, I just feel how non-smokers feel all the time.

People talk jovially about not feeding the nicotine monster. However, the last few days I’ve come to start thinking of it as a nicotine parasite. Once introduced to my system, it brainwashed me in to believing I needed the nicotine, unwittingly instilling fear and dread if I didn’t provide it. Not only that, it will be draining away at my health every time I submit. I was caught in an endless loop. A slave to the nicotine.

The reality is the fear belonged to the parasite itself, fear of being killed off and not being allowed to survive. To hide the subconscious insecurity I had started to believe I enjoyed it. Why else would I spend the money on it and justify waking up with a mouth full of phlegm, day in day out? This moment of clarity made me feel really pathetic, but positive nonetheless that I felt I'd hit the nail on the head finally.

For those of you that have read or seen Lord of the Rings, I started to think of myself as Gollum and “My Precious”, slowly but ruthlessly poisoning my mind and body, allowing it to consume me. I want to and will be Smeagle again. I want my life back.

Bit of a geeky analogy I know, but I thought it fit the profile perfectly.

I am now on Day 7, and with the above in mind, haven’t looked back. I have the odd panging feeling, and it certainly isn’t easy, but my instinct is to fight it, even (nay, especially) in times of stress. You may read this and think I need psychiatric assistance, however I am hoping at least one of you can relate to it or change your opinion.

Good luck all, however you manage it!

ad1jnl

I'm now on Day 5 of being smoke free - tbh I haven't really felt like smoking or been tempted. I have thought about it but in a kind of glad I'm a non-smoker kind of way. However, I have been getting very short tempered and irritable - especially today as work isn't going too well today.....

BUT I had bad days while I was smoking - I think the cigs allowed me to get away from the immediate task for 5 mins - I need to find some other way of doing that now....

Onwards and upwards

Jon

Dreamingalound

Hi all, happy friday!!! I'm into day three and its going well, i'm not having the cravings at work which is great, i was fine last night. However during the night i had a dream that i was walking with my cousin and he offered me a cig and i smoked it, at the end he said "i thought you gave up"...so now i'm dreaming about smoking!!! but it hasn't stopped me today.

I'm off out for some beers tonight and there will be other smokers there. I'm hoping it will be easy, raining? i want rain tonight so it gives me another reason not to go out there!

The big test is that i am off to portugal for easter weekend in 3 weeks time, my fiancee is a smoker and so are her parents who we are going with! so around three smokers for 4 days...its going to be tough!

Have a good weekend all, keep strong.

Dreamingalound

ScRiMpNsAvE wrote: »

It was only in my last days of smoking that I stopped to think about whether I was actually enjoying my cigarettes, or whether I’d convinced myself over time that I was as a way to justify it. I don’t consider myself a stupid person, however I struggled with how non-smokers could go without all day, not only without giving it a fleeting thought that they were missing out on anything, but that most were on the other end of the scale and would give me a dagger-stare or an amplified tut if even a wisp of smoke were to end up anywhere near them.

I thought through the process methodically; I’d wake up in the morning, feeling this insecurity that I couldn’t start the day without feeding the addiction, putting it first before anything else. There was so much build up, and when I actually got to light the thing, and inhale a lungful, breath it out, then…

Pfff…

“Did I enjoy that? Not sure, but certainly wasn’t bowled over. However, I’ll give it the benefit of the doubt and try again…”

Pfff…

“On second thoughts I don’t think I enjoyed that. But why else would I be doing it?”

Pfff…

“I’ve started so I’ll finish…”

By the time I got half way I realised that I certainly didn’t enjoy the experience. However, the distraction had gone and I could finally function as normal. That is until, of course, that nagging started once again. Loop back to start. I don't feel better after a cigarette, I just feel how non-smokers feel all the time.

People talk jovially about not feeding the nicotine monster. However, the last few days I’ve come to start thinking of it as a nicotine parasite. Once introduced to my system, it brainwashed me in to believing I needed the nicotine, unwittingly instilling fear and dread if I didn’t provide it. Not only that, it will be draining away at my health every time I submit. I was caught in an endless loop. A slave to the nicotine.

The reality is the fear belonged to the parasite itself, fear of being killed off and not being allowed to survive. To hide the subconscious insecurity I had started to believe I enjoyed it. Why else would I spend the money on it and justify waking up with a mouth full of phlegm, day in day out? This moment of clarity made me feel really pathetic, but positive nonetheless that I felt I'd hit the nail on the head finally.

For those of you that have read or seen Lord of the Rings, I started to think of myself as Gollum and “My Precious”, slowly but ruthlessly poisoning my mind and body, allowing it to consume me. I want to and will be Smeagle again. I want my life back.

Bit of a geeky analogy I know, but I thought it fit the profile perfectly.

I am now on Day 7, and with the above in mind, haven’t looked back. I have the odd panging feeling, and it certainly isn’t easy, but my instinct is to fight it, even (nay, especially) in times of stress. You may read this and think I need psychiatric assistance, however I am hoping at least one of you can relate to it or change your opinion.

Good luck all, however you manage it!

This makes perfect sense, i gather you used the Alan Carr method as you are talking about parasite and the monster?

maccababe

continuing to not smoke and all is well. still get feelings of restlessness but they are becoming less and less, am now getting the eating under control. Thinking less about have a cig and its now more of a passing fancy rather than a desperate need to have a cigarette.
good to hear everyone is doing well. those of you who have had a blip, carry on giving up, try not to feel to defeated and keep trying.
have fun at the weekend.
maccababe

helnag

Sue-UU wrote: »

Re the sinus trouble, I suffered terribly with mine as soon as I stopped and used to 'stream' most of the day. I went to the Doc as it was that bad. He said it was all due to quitting and should be fine once they'd adapted. However, in my case he was wrong as I went onto develop a real problem with nasal polyps! Whether it was just coincidental or brought about by quitting we never knew, but it resulted in mine being removed.

Yours are different though and the blocking could well be due to them adapting. Before they get any worse I think I'd go to the Doc and let him/her take a look and see, my DH suffers with his and his are awfully painful - whereas ironically, I've never had pain with mine!

Sue

Oh I hope I don't, I've suffered with ENT problems since a child and have already had one of those horrible ops on my sinuses which to be honest never made much difference, I'm already plucking up the courage to see the doctor cos I'm losing my hearing in one of my ears and last time they put gromets in they said next time my hearing goes I'll need a hearing aid which fills me with dread (I'm only 26 and I know this is minor but it still scares me). Funny to think not smoking has made this worse or maybe just made it more obvious. When I go to the doctors about my hearing I'll ask about my sinuses too, just not sure hwen I'll do it yet. Thanks Sue-UU. You really are a great help.

Helen xx

Sue-UU

Great news at having reached Day 13 Tisme!! However, I'd be inclined to agree about the inhalator especially as you have your lotty to vent your frustrations out on. You're, in a sense, still feeding the addiction, do try to bury the blessed thing somewhere! Try to go for the gum rather than polos and after the 'thoughts' have gone get rid of it, then have another next time etc. The polos could stay for a long time as everton mints did with me, the trouble is it's so hard to break - and before you know, you've another bloomin habit!!!:mad: Stay strong whatever you do!

I love your final 2 paragraphs whathavewedone, that sort of of realisation is what's getting you through quitting so brilliantly! Most of your strength has come from your kiddies, they've given you so much in their short lives, but it's a two-way street and you've done the work, they've provided the incentive! Superb!!:D

Excellent SAS!! I could tell with every word of that just how, like us all believe me, it had got to you over the years, especially the latter times of ppffing!;) I don't think you need psychiatric assistance ...or at least, if you did then we ALL should have had it as I'll bet everyone of us has felt exactly like you have, honest! If the way you're viewing it is getting you through this then keep up the great work. If we all could do what you've done, everyone would get to their goals no hassles! Keep the analogy up SAS, it's great. Read it whenever you're having any sort of difficulties, I'm sure it'll put you right!!


You're going good again Jon, very well done!! Re the short fuse, I think we all have one of those, but at times like now it just feels as though it's possibly worse as, in our minds "it should be" and maybe our minds are right in a way, but it'll pass. For times when we blow our top in the every day world which you're a part of now, use something to lash out at/on. If you're at a gym it's easy because of punch-bags, when at work think of something to use similarly ...a pencil stabbing away on a pad, pretend there's a nasty bug on the floor and stamp the h*ll out of it. You'll come up with something I'm sure. At home there's nothing that beats a pillow, though for goodness sake put another couple of pillow cases on it or you'll be spitting feathers out for weeks!


Very well done Dreamingalound!! What you exlained about your dream is experienced by just about everyone of us and the disappointment we feel is so very real that we're convinced it DID happen! You'll possibly have them now and again, but after smoking such a wicked drug for so long it's hardly any wonder why, but they will go.

Don't look too far ahead to the holiday, by then you'll be so much stronger and won't want to break your new and far better habit! You may even get them all thinking that if you can do it so can THEY!!! Whatever happens, don't succumbe as you'll hate yourself for being so weak-willed for the sake of just 4 days. You'll also see us all glaring at you and saying "just you DARE!!!!" :mad: Re the pub, it's never worth going outside - but if you do (and you're possibly there by now!:rolleyes:) wander around and away from your mates and politely (or otherwise! ) refuse any offers with "I no longer smoke" or "I've quit!"
Maccabe, you are one VERY determined lass and doing splendidly!! :T I do so hope you're feeling so very proud of all you've achieved so far, you really should be as it's a he*l of a thing to get to grips with, but YOU are!!!! Keep up that inner strength and have a super weekend which will take you 2 days closer to that goal!:D
Hi Helen, oh dear, wish I'd kept it buttoned now! :silenced: It's difficult though when you know nowt about people's lives. Don't worry too much about the hearing part though, my DH has had one for a few years now as his mastoids became so badly infected and our Doc just kept feeding him antibiotics rather than act on DH's pleas to send him to the ENT dept. Ah well, water under the bridge, though it all happened in the other ear a couple of years ago! Both were operated on and all the mastoid bits removed along with link bones! Still, he's fine again now and wears his hearing aid without any problems or regrets. It must be better for us gals to cover up with our hair though, so IF it does need to be done, look on the bright side - and it beats being unable to hear!

Re the sinus trouble, it may just be a temporary thing and all will right itself shortly. Possibly just completely coincidental, so please don't worry - after all, it won't change it! Smoking can temorarily have these affects on all parts of the body, such as some of the folk here having terrible coughs and chest problems, we just need a little patience and the liklihood is that all will come right shortly. I'm always here if you want to chat, don't forget. So far you're doing so very well so please don't allow other problems, that may never happen anyway, to spook you ....though it may take your mind off of the evil things!!! :rolleyes: Have a great weekend and cope with one thing at a time.

Keep very, very strong all and enjoy the remaining fine weather while you can. Fill your lungs with fresh air when you go out and every time you exhale, get it in your mind that a little bit more of the smoker is going and the fresh air brings you closer to your non-smoking status which you already own!

Sue

stroppy

Hey guys
Just wanted to say thanks for the replies and not giving me a hard time
I'm still not smoking in the day which I suppose is one good thing, so far today I have had one cigarette whereas on a 'normal' day I would have smoked about 15 by now.
Its the evenings that got to me the most and I just couldnt handle it....
As Whathavewedone said it was my first proper attempt to give up and I still want to,just not my time yet (excuses excuses eh!) I admire all of you that are sticking with it so much!
Silly thing is I felt so proud of myself when I wasnt smoking , loved the smell of everything around me and hated the smell of it on people. Ive noticed today my eyes look baggier already and I have more ulcers on my tongue but then again I suffer with them whenever im down, the whole thing has been an emotional rollercoaster for me and feel at the moment i'm damned if i do and damned if I dont
I think if i try again I wont tell anyone close to me as I just put a whole heap of pressure on myself that it backfired big time!
I'll still be popping on here to try and keep myself on the straight and narrow and not get up to 20 a day again!
Stroppy xx