The giving up/cutting down alcohol support thread! Part 2

Pippilongstocking

eselt wrote: »

Good luck .............., I know its hard but there is NO REASON to drink today is there? Its Tuesday, it isn't anyones birthday or anniversary, you've not got friends round, money stress is reducing as OH is helping with the groceries, its not a special occasion (oh apart from holby on later!) etc etc. You don't have to drink- you know you don't. You don't want to drink- you know you don't. Drink doesn't like you- you know it doesn't. It frightens you and makes you anxious and guilty. Just a few hours to hold your nerve .

Never a truer word said.

xx

jo1972

Morning all

Feels odd waking up clear headed, this has only happended a small amount of times in the last 16 years, was thinking about this when in bed last night. I abstained during most of my last 2 pregnancies (1st pregnancy I didn't have a problem then), well that was by the time I'd found out I was pregnant, then after about 6 months I 'allowed' myself 1 can a week (on a Friday, like a reward for getting through the week or summat ) and from 2006 I have had a couple of quits of 1 month, 4 months, 3 months and 1 month respectively...so that makes a grand total of around 20 months including a few odd days here and there since 2006 (didn't have a drink free day before then). So, who's good at maths? 20 months sober in 16 years, what's the percentage??

So after all this thinking about drinking, I had 2 very vivid dreams last night. Both of them was me being in the pub with various people, drinking till closing then not being able to get home cos it's so late at night and there's no public transport

Anyway, enough rambling, I got to go out in a minute and I'm running late as usual!

Maman, OH doesn't know I drink, it's my big secret, hence him not offering or refusing to buy it!

Dippychick, the fags were definately 'easier' for me, everyone's different though, just take as much support as you can. Pop over to the giving up smoking thread and get some advice, good luck

Morning everyone else :wave: xx

eselt

Hi all- Jo, very proud of you today, what a struggle for you and you seem to have found amazing willpower. Can I just ask a personal question- when you gave up before for months on end was there any trigger which tipped you over the edge into drinking again? Or did you just think 'I really fancy a drink?' and start again out of the blue? I'm just trying to think of how I can get prepared for stressful events without automatically thinking 'I could do with a drink'- its still the first thing that pops into my head- I've bought a book on cognitive behaviour therapy which has some exercises on 'thought stopping' and 'managing negative thoughts'- will let you all know if I anything works.

Dippy- I'm ashamed to say I still smoke, so I might join you on the cigs thread- hope people are as nice as they are on here.

Hope the scales are kind to you today Molly. Best of luck today everyone.

PS Jo, maths isn't my thing butit might keep my mind occupied today thinking about your % dry- perhaps GP could come with some sort of graph, or Fay could give you length of time in willow years or something?!

Patchoulli

Morning all - had a glass of red last night whilst watching Holby (is Jac, or isn't she?) and then wanted another, but resisted, although it was very difficult. A mug of hot Ribena just didn't cut it for me!

As I'm a complete bookworm (currently reading everything written by Anne Rice) I am putting half the money I save from not buying wine into my Amazon habit - and the rest into our holiday savings. This month I've managed to buy the Mayfair Witches trilogy so far.

Amazon loves me as much as the local offy did this time last year!

So as well as my liver benefitting, Amazon are having some help in the credit crunch - lol.

X

GreyPilgrim

Chaps, I've been considering bowing out of the challenge for a little while as I think it's being a little counterproductive for my own circumstances.

I think I'm doing really well! Since I started this on December 12th, I've had two nights of drinking - a massive drink (lager, wine, spirits) on jan 10th, and then 3/4 of a pint of lager on Feb 14th.

It's a massive turnaround for someone who in a typical week drank probably 5 nights out 7 (some nights being a couple of cans, some nights being stupid amounts). Since Dec 12th, I've had 65 alcohol free nights!!

I'm not missing the beer at all, and even that fact is a shock to me - I thought I'd be crawling the walls by now. The place I 'ideally' want to be is someone who doesn't drink and I think I'm 99% of the way there. However in doing this challenge, I'm constantly 'reminding' myself about the fact I'm not drinking and it's almost as if I'm perpetuating an issue that isn't there.

Not explaining it well...there IS an issue there, but I want to move on from it a bit. I want to be in the same place as someone who has never drank, and that person woudn't be counting the number of days since they drank, would they...? Does that make sense...?

It's like I'm constantly saying to myself "Just forget about alcohol. Don't even think about alcohol....have you forgotten about alcohol yet? Alcohol, alcohol, alcohol..."

If this sounds like maybe I'm 'giving up' the challenge, I promise you I'm not, I'm just following my gut instinct on this and doing what I think I have to have a happy, satisfied, secure alcohol free life. The thread has been invaluable to me in kickstarting the whole thought process of addressing my problems, and if I hadn't read some of your the experiences (in relation to the panic attacks / paranoia / anxiety especially) then I really would have believed that I was having some sever mental issues. If I hadn't joined, then I think I'd have just tried to blot out the bad feelings with more drink and started an even worse spiral.

Cake analogy coming up!
You put a cake tin full of cake mixture in the oven, set the temperature and close the door. If you keep opening the door to check on it every five minutes then it's going to go flat and fail completely. You need to walk away and leave it for a good couple hours.

Does that make anymore sense???? I need to walk away a bit and let my cake bake.

I'm going to forget about all this, and set a reminder on my calendar for May 25th when I will have hit 100 solid days without beer.

And I'll probably lurk a bit from time to time. I hope you understand?

beachbeth

I haven't been on this thread for a while. Ive been really stressed and upset and so Ive been drinking too much. They stopped my Incapacity Benefit in November (I suffer with depression) and although its going to a tribunal appeal it takes months and in the meantime Im not getting my IB. A few weeks ago a beloved dog died and I was so upset. She was lovely and I miss her very much. All this has led to me drinking too much.

I went to the docs this morning to see if he could up my dose of antidepressants but he said I needed to stop drinking because it is a depressant and was stopping my antid's from working. He has given me thiamine (vit tablets (I take multi vitamins already so do I really need these? ). He also gave me something called chlordiazepoxide which Im to take 3 times a day to make it easier for me to stop drinking.

Im worried about these though as they will make me drowsy. Am I going to be asleep all day? How long do they take to wear off - if I take one in the evening will I be fit to drive in the morning? Im wondering if I should just abstain from alcohol and only take one of these if I am really craving a drink? The doctor I saw wasn't really that easy to talk to and I found it difficult to ask him all this.

Lurkio

jo1972 wrote: »

.....So, who's good at maths? 20 months sober in 16 years, what's the percentage??

16 years = 192 months

(20/192) * 100 = 10.42%



:wave: everyone

I'm on 11 now, wb. Don't think tonight will be though.....

Miss_Piggy_2

Good morning all

Winebox - 16 for me please

GP You have to do whats right for you. You know we are all here when you need us

Eselt What you said hit the nail on the head. Think we all have to realise that alcohol is not our friend!

Jo1972 Well done on last night. Sometimes it feels we have no control...I know there have been days when I organise everything around me getting to a shop for a bottle of wine. So well done!

Beachbeth - why don't you ring your doctors practice and ask to speak to someone else? Or you could try NHS direct. Am sure they would help. Good luck.

Busy day today. So will lurk later. Be strong all of you who are struggling.

Miss P
xx

jo1972

Lurkio wrote: »

16 years = 192 months

(20/192) * 100 = 10.42%

Good god, so that means I've drank 89.58% of the last 16 years :eek: :eek:

Wished I hadn't asked

eselt, I remember my trigger on my first relapse after the 4 month stint, that was a v. stressful driving situation on Xmas Eve 2006, after trying to find my outlaws new house somewhere in outer mongolia, got very very lost on the way, should have been a 40min trip and it we were 2 hours late....lots of shouting between me and OH and lots of crying (by me!) and as I hated going there anyway it was a stressful visit as I was panicking about the journey home which was equally as awful cos it was dark and raining that misty kind of rain up country lanes that could only take one car with oncoming cars with their full beams on and not turning them off...god makes me shudder remembering it. I can remember the relief of turning into a road I recognised a few miles away and there was this offy with it's lights shining bright and inviting, like a santa's grotto but with beer! It happened so quickly and I didn't have time to do my count to ten and think about it thing that my counsellor had taught me. I told OH I was going to buy 2 cans to 'relax' and 'celebrate' xmas. Obviously then xmas day came and, well, everyone drinks on xmas day don't they , then boxing day, well ditto there it continued.... The other times I think I just became complacent and forgot the real reasons I'd quit, had the obvious 'I'll only do it today' thoughts but it's just like smoking, you have 1 and then back on 20 a day the following day. Good idea about the CBT book, there is a lot to be said about conditioning your mind and preparing...good luck and please do let me know if you find any gems in there xx

GP, we will always be here if you need us, you need to do what is right for you and I'm so glad that you feel you don't have the problem you thought you might have had. Keep popping in though cos I like reading your postive posts and thoughts xx

BB, so sorry to hear how down you've been, I think a few of us understand how you've been feeling. I can also understand why you've been drinking, probably to forget the other carp that's going on in your life...but, your GP is correct in saying that alcohol is a depressant in itself. Yesterday I felt un-motivated, no self-esteem and like I am never gonna be truely happy. Today after just 1 AF day I feel as though there's hope, I feel like I have more energy and actually feel like doing some housework :eek: which is very odd!! Though to be honest, it doesn't really matter what your GP, us or anyone else says, you need to feel as though you want to do it yourself. Maybe try just today and see how you feel tomorrow...one day at a time xx

Lurky, MP, YM, Miss P, Fay, everyone else....hellooooo :wave:

Took DD1 to get her hair cut this morning and ran in the shop to grab bread which is all I need for today as I've got everything else in...have no reason to go out later so hopefully I won't be visiting the shop and getting tempted, still got some Mr T's finest belgian choklit tiffen squares and mint feasts to get me through

Off to do some housework!!

xx

jo1972

BB, forgot to say, definately take the thiamine as this helps to repair the liver....don't know about the other one you've been given, Eselt might know more xx