Worst situation ever!!!!!!

Strapped

siowenson wrote: »

She is a girl who wants more more more and who is never happy with what she has, she always has to have that little something extra.
All these years I've been giving her what she wanted, now that we're stuck, she is bailing.
But, then again, what 20 something female of this day and age doesn't? Consumerism and the strive to get a man who can give them everything on a plate has been drummed into them from a small age.
I don't know about you guys but I've noticed that a lot of people are splitting up recently. It is my view that if my ex-fiancee and I cant make a go of it, no-one can.

This post could've been written by my hubby, 15 years ago. Fortunately she bailed for another man, and although he was left to pay off the negative equity, and spent the next couple of years working double shifts to keep the roof over his head in a house devoid of possessions, eventually he met me ( :A lol ) and I'd say he's much happier now (12 years and two kids together not that we're counting...)

Try to sort out the finances fairly, and get outside help to get an objective perspective if you can. Being friends with an ex is a good start. Personally I'd bite the bullet and make a clean break even if that means you have to take out a loan - better than being repossesed and better than coming to some arrangement where you continue to be dependent on your ex to pay her half of a mortgage.

sheryldoc

This post went totally weird hahax

izzybusy23

siowenson wrote: »

She is a girl who wants more more more and who is never happy with what she has, she always has to have that little something extra.
All these years I've been giving her what she wanted, now that we're stuck, she is bailing.
But, then again, what 20 something female of this day and age doesn't? Consumerism and the strive to get a man who can give them everything on a plate has been drummed into them from a small age. Nope, not all women.. some of us do live in the real world you know!!!
I don't know about you guys but I've noticed that a lot of people are splitting up recently. It is my view that if my ex-fiancee and I cant make a go of it, no-one can.

I think this may be a good thing for you to split up with your girlfriend.. she sounds like she will never be happy with what you can offer her. If she is a materialistic as you say, then nothing you do will ever be good enough. I think if your GF is looking for a man who has everything and more money than he knows what to do with then she will be searching for a long time and will end up very disappointed.

If I were you I would try to sell the house and take the hit now rather than it be a milestone around my neck. Give it 12 months and hopefully you will look back on this chapter of your life as a learning curve you had to go through to make you stronger for the future.

Good luck!

scousethife

I think I just ate some magic mushrooms before i read this thread

its mental!

GDB2222

Dithering_Dad wrote: »

The worst case scenario, would be to get declared bankrupt and then you will have zero liability for your half of the property.

Good luck.

Is that really worse than having say £20k or £30k to pay back (or possibly much more - see below)? What about the money contributed by the girl's parents? Won't they want that back? I am not advocating bankruptcy, as the numbers are not too awful in this case, but it's not obvious it's the worst scenario.

Anyway, they need to market the house asap, and they should assume it's worth the best part of 20% less than they paid for it. Maybe the reduction is even worse if it was a new-build. Who knows? But the worst thing they could do is stick out for too much now and see the market continue to slide away from under them.

Dinah93

Just read this thread and I think it's really sad that she has managed to squash all the optemism out of you. I am a 20 something female, and I used to always want more, but since meeting my OH I couldn't care if we lived in a tiny flat and ate beans on toast, as I know he would protect and take care of me, and things are just things and always striving for the next status symbol is a sign of an empty life. Equally not all the women you meet in bars will be cheap and nasty, many are there trying to meet someone special, but where else do they go nowadays?

As regards the house, you need to sort this, to sell it yes you will likely have to take a huge cut in what you bought it for. But work out what you are paying each month in interest on a depreciating asset that is currently offering you not even a roof over your head and you'll see that taking that drop now will save you bundles in the long run if it sits on the market 3 years. And while you might be getting on great now, you were together a long time, things aren't going to stay so comfy when she brings some new guy on the scene in search of her happy ever after.

Best wishes to you x

siowenson

I wonder if we can take a payment holiday from the morgage untill the house is sold?

Is this a silly idea?

Squish_21

siowenson wrote: »

I wonder if we can take a payment holiday from the morgage untill the house is sold?

Is this a silly idea?

Mortgage company may let you take a payment holiday BUT you would obv be increasing your negative equity.

flaura

siowenson wrote: »

I wonder if we can take a payment holiday from the morgage untill the house is sold?

Is this a silly idea?

perhaps you could change the mortgage to interest only until it is sold ?

would you then be able to afford to rent out the whole property???

siowenson

flaura wrote: »

perhaps you could change the mortgage to interest only until it is sold ?

would you then be able to afford to rent out the whole property???

This sounds like a good idea. Would I need to pay any fee's for changing to interest only?

If I were to rent out the property what would happen if someone wanted to buy it?
Can I throw the tennents out or do they have to stay for a minimum term?