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blacksheep101

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galvanizersbaby

blacksheep101 wrote: »

My husband has to pay a monthly sum to his ex-wife - she does not work and gets substantial benefits due to having rheumatoid arthritis. When they got divorced she got the house (no mortgage - all paid up) and everything in it plus the benefits and monthly allowance from him . Their children are grown up and independent.

Is the monthly sum child maintenance payment? - if so I take it the children are still living at home/ in education?

skintchick

Surely if the kids are grown up and independent he is under no legal obligation to pay her anything? I know my friend only gets money till her son is out of education and then it stops.

Slinky

My Dad's been paying my mum £30 a month for the past 28 years. He got custody of us when we were kids. She was the one who had an affair and left although Dad let it go through as unreasonable behaviour to let her save face.

Divorce laws are an a$$

He daren't go back and appeal against it in case they decide to increase the amount he has to pay her.

saveallmymoney

I think all old court orders can be thrown away and you can just go to whatever the CSA is called now.

Mely

Slinky thats incredibly unfair on your poor dad! He sounds like such a decent and good man. Why does he have to pay your mum money after all these years of paying it?

floss2

Financial settlements & maintenance arrangements such as this can depend upon the circumstances & employability of the person involved. If she has RA, then she very likely cannot work, so that would be taken into account when the finances are agreed.

Has your husband heard anything about a new partner? Would he ask her, and would she tell him if he did ask? Perhaps your husband could ask for a review?

peachyprice

Is it spousal maintenance he's paying?
I guess you could only prove she has a new live-in partner when he appears on the electoral roll, but she may be too clever for that.

Slinky

Mely wrote: »

Slinky thats incredibly unfair on your poor dad! He sounds like such a decent and good man. Why does he have to pay your mum money after all these years of paying it?

Because that's what was on the court order, that he had to pay her £30 a month ontop of a huge lump sum, unless she married again. Of course nobody's been mad enough to marry her. She lied in court, turned on the taps, the judge believed her and Dad's been paying ever since.

Still, I hope the monthly '30 pieces of silver' make her happy. My brother and I haven't spoken to her willingly since 1979, or in my case, at all, for 14 years.

She once threatened my Dad that if us kids didn't speak to her, she'd go after his pension.

Not a nice person. Bet you're glad you're not related to her!

Mely

I wish there was another way to find out if someone is living with her, apart from the electoral roll. Perhaps get a neighbour of hers to verify it? But i expect that would be difficult and may cause problems.

Mely

Slinky.... well your dad has the love of you and your brother and thats priceless and something your mum doesnt have. Yes im glad im not related to her but my dads just as bad....families eh!!!!