Son taking drugs - How would I know?

Geenie

Savvy_Sue wrote: »

If I had a lodger smoking weed, I'm not sure how much longer they'd be staying.

If I had a son smoking weed, I'd want to be d*mn sure he not only didn't smoke anywhere near the house, but never brought the stuff anywhere near the house either.

Too many people think it's no longer an illegal drug. They're wrong. It's not coming into my house, even in small quantities. At least, not in any greater quantities than you can pick up on your clothes in the general environment.

I have just been clearing out a house left by tenants who were into the dreaded stuff big time. They were even growing plants out the back of the house we have since learnt!!:eek:

That aside, they were bright/ intelligent indivuals at one time, but had become so fogged up by the weed they couldn't function or work, and ended up on benefits!

Not a single room when clearing didn't have burnt out spliffs in jars or secret corners, and there were 5 children of 10 years upwards in this house! All the teens bedrooms had evidence of pot smoking, aside from the general debris left!

If you met the adults driving along our country lanes it was truly frightening as they were out of control like any drink driver most of the time!

I pity their new LL's, but we were not asked for references so don't know who they are.

brownbake

hollydays wrote: »

That assumption that weed isn't too harmful is one that nearly destroyed someone close to me .

I would ask him how much he spends on weed a week and watch his reaction-can you tell if he is lying?
Cocaine is also used because it allows people to drink a lot more than they normally could.
agreed though, he may just be a spendthrift.

Quite right - weed is one if not THE most insidious drug available. It DID destroy someone very close to me. These liberal idiots who claim it is harmless are exactly that - idiots. Yes it affects people in different ways but long term users tend to be apathetic complete losers.

Cocaine is equally as destructive - whether he goes clubbing is irrelevant - if he is going round peoples houses he would be doing it there.

FYI an ounce of weed is going to cost from £100 - 150. A gram of coke is going to cost from £40 - 60. If he has a tolerance to the coke then he will need significantly more than that - especially if he is buying for a syndicate. A gram will last 2 people up to 3 hours - an all night session then it is easy to see how £150 gets lost.

Inkedkitten

astonsmummy wrote: »

And smoking weed is not the end of the world, loads of people do it and dont end up psycotic, just like loads of people drink and dont end up as alcoholics.

I never said it wasn't harmful, but come on compared to our legal 'friend' alcohol it's pretty damn safe.

With all due respect, if it's so safe why is it that of all the studies done on it none have proved it to be safe, even when used medically it's controlled extensively. I do agree that loads of people drink and don't end up alcoholics, but it still does damage to their body, just as pot does, even if you're not addicted. I ended up with several broken bones because of my ex's "safe" habit. Perhaps I'm bias, but I can only go on my experience.

In all honesty it's a matter of character, if like me he's tried it and didn't enjoy it he won't smoke it, us teenagers aren't always as thick as we look , so perhaps your son is just having his experiences, just don't let him take it too far.

astonsmummy

Inkedkitten wrote: »

With all due respect, if it's so safe why is it that of all the studies done on it none have proved it to be safe, even when used medically it's controlled extensively. I do agree that loads of people drink and don't end up alcoholics, but it still does damage to their body, just as pot does, even if you're not addicted. I ended up with several broken bones because of my ex's "safe" habit. Perhaps I'm bias, but I can only go on my experience.

In all honesty it's a matter of character, if like me he's tried it and didn't enjoy it he won't smoke it, us teenagers aren't always as thick as we look , so perhaps your son is just having his experiences, just don't let him take it too far.

With all due respect, I have plenty of experience of weed smokers and drinkers, I know who I'd rather sit and have a chat with.
My uncle died from alcohol abuse, never have I known anyone to die from weed abuse.
I have not said it's safe, nothing is safe, but it is relatively harmless compared to alcohol abuse, and I'm not just talking about effects on the body.
Since when do people that smoke draw go out, have fights, throw up all over the street, destroy property, get arrested for being lairy, etc.

hollydays

..the image of the calm,placid pot smoker-oh yes that myth-well trust me theres a lot of other stuff that goes along with pot smoking sometimes,mainly because of the mental damage it causes,i hope you do never experience that,i really do,and you can't chat with someone who is paranoid, they will be too busy climbing the walls and harming those around them,and themselves,but of course,they can stop whenever they want,cant' they?:(

RobertoMoir

chocomonsta wrote: »

I also believe as his Mum I do have the right to know what he is up to, the world would be a better place if parents looked out for their children more.

...................waiting to get slated now:o

Certainly not going to slate you, but if he's 18 your "right" is more along the lines of "decent upbringing should allow this" rather than "I'm legally entitled to know" sort of thing. I agree the world would be a better place if more people made the sorts of efforts you're doing though!

saubryn

Why is it that drugs are the first thing many people assume in cases like this? I know someone who spent £3000 over a period of about 18 months on virtual items for a computer game, but would never admit that to someone who wasn't a gamer themselves.

There are lots of things you could spend a fortune on that aren't drugs / booze / gambling. I remember once ordering some stuff online, then getting hit by an £80 import tax on the delivery - I'd certainly have resented being quizzed as to why a trip to pick up a package led to me pulling £100 out the bank!

Seriously, if he's never given you any reason to think he's doing anything illegal (other than the weed), why not just trust him? If you push it, he'll end up sullen and distant simply because he thinks you DON'T trust him...

astonsmummy

hollydays wrote: »

..the image of the calm,placid pot smoker-oh yes that myth-well trust me theres a lot of other stuff that goes along with pot smoking sometimes,mainly because of the mental damage it causes,i hope you do never experience that,i really do,and you can't chat with someone who is paranoid, they will be too busy climbing the walls and harming those around them,and themselves,but of course,they can stop whenever they want,cant' they?:(

It's no myth, it's my reality, what you describe is very extreme and rare.
No different from me saying that every person who drinks alcohol is a raving alcoholic, with a nasty temprement, violent behaviour and just down right horrible, it's not true.

naturally_2

Forgive me for not having concrete facts to back this up, but it is my belief that a lot higher percentage of people who use weed end up with mental problems than equivalent percentage of people who drink alcohol end up with liver or other associated problems. I believe this is because you don't need anywhere near as much to end up with problems from weed as you do alcohol. But like I say, I openly don't have any concrete evidence on that.

I'm not for one minute trying to belittle the dangers of alcohol abuse.

Many people who suffer from mental health problems associated with weed aren't diagnosed, either because it is impossible to make the link for certain or because their problems are too low grade to be recognised and diagnosed. There are so many levels of mental health problems caused by weed, not just your stereotypical extreme loony case.

Luckily for me I don't know anyone who has had alcohol related problems. Unfortunately for me, I do know a fair few people who have paranoia and irrationality, which they fully acknowledge is as a result of taking this drug when they were younger. Its a distressing thing, to have a mental illness, and KNOW that its not normal, but be powerless to do anything about it. And its horrible to be on the receiving end of it - I don't think the word paranoia fully describes the anguish that these people, their friends and family go through; and I'm talking about cases that would probably be considered low grade.

hollydays

astonsmummy wrote: »

It's no myth, it's my reality, what you describe is very extreme and rare.
No different from me saying that every person who drinks alcohol is a raving alcoholic, with a nasty temprement, violent behaviour and just down right horrible, it's not true.

no,it really isn't rare,as many people would confirm.The sooner a lot more parents get themselves educated about this,the better.
Where ever did i say every pot smoker was that?But mental damage is not rare.