Debt free social life?????

Burlesque_Babe

At some point your wife's 'friends' will get into the point of no return with their debt also and will then become the ones not wanting to be called 'boring' and might realise how unpleasant they had been. Hopefully by then your wife will realise that friends who can't understand the importance of budgeting and only spending what is available are friends not really worth having.

How about a games evening? Drag all the board games out and have Scrabble, Monopoly etc evenings, or have a bit of a 'tournament' going between you - ie best of 3 games of Scrabble over a week gives the other a massage (or something else ) which doesn't cost anything.

£600 a month is :eek: _pale_ :eek: and to be honest, with high debt levels (could you do an SOA so we can help look at helping) spending £200 a month is also _pale_ on a social life.

Use the vouchers board to its fullest - look at Lovefilm and similar sites for free DVD rental trials.

Take up an evening class together - learn Spanish, learn to Salsa or to cook. It will cost £80 - £100 each for the whole term and give you a joint interest once a week.

Look in your local freebie newspaper - there are always loads of things going on in the evenings listed somewhere - rambling, choirs, interest groups, amateur dramatics, book clubs, loads of choices and all free or a tiny subscription.

Plan for a concert - maybe a couple of times a year if you are die hard fans. Look for good hotel offers on MSE and save for the tickets.

Paying off your debts is now officially 'cool' and as times get harder, those still out spending silly money they can't afford and don't have will increasingly be seen as the 'uncool' ones.

How about this as a debt free wannabee social life (if you wanted it!)

Monday - DVD night in courtesy of a free film rental
Tuesday - nightclass together
Wednesday - Orange film Wednesday
Thursday - friends come round for dinner (rotate it between the different addreses) - you cook, they bring the wine.
Friday - some kind of 'interest' group
Saturday - Night out with friends, look to go to places with 2 for 1 drinks offers etc (Wetherspoons are a good place for cheaper drinks)
Sunday - night in front of TV, homemade cocktail night or games evening

Welcome to the 'cool club'..........:D


(blimey, I'd be knackered if I had that kind of social week - be it debt free friendly or not!! :rotfl: )

Jvic28

Jacks_xxx wrote: »

For the cinema there's Orange Wednesdays and SeeFilmsFirst

If you don't know Glen, Seefilmfirst.com gives you free cinema tickets to films before they are released.

annamc75

If you are short of a social life then why not get a job in a bar or club? You get the atmosphere and the drink (and tips).

It sounds a bit like you have both been trying to keep up the Jones and that this lifestyle was never in your financial reach. We have all been there but there has to come a moment when you both realise that mourning the old life will not help moving on to the future.

Have either of you ever had hobbies? I for example do my family tree and restore black and white photos. I am a huge reader (as my grandmother said you are never alone with a book) and would love to join a book club but there is nothing in the area. I have previously joined am drams and choirs and generally find that bored people just lack imagination.

Good luck with your new life

Ax

Burlesque_Babe

Something me and my ex used to do is go on pub walks. There are loads of books for pub walks for all areas of the UK. We used to pack a picnic on a Sunday morning, choose a walk, park in the pub car park, then maybe have 1 drink in the pub afterwards and then find somewhere nice to have the picnic.

I read back on your previous posts Glen and you wanted advice in the summer on helping a friend who had 'been to hell and back' with debt on small salaries, had cleared it but lost their house and was now doing stuff like 5k holidays and 1k watches for his wife (one of your wife's friends). Maybe chatting to your wife about their 'hell' might help you both come to terms with the choice of a few nights in together is much better than what they went through.

SC01

It's not easy cutting down on an active social life but it will show you who your true friends are. If your main reason for going out is to see your friends then I don't see why any of the suggestions above won't work. Perhaps you need to understand why you felt the need to be out all the time in the first place - it may not be comfortable to think about but until you can understand why, you won't be able to be comfortable with the alternatives.

Frankly I much prefer staying in with my friends either at my house or theirs than going out but then I do work in a pub as my second job and that combines the two for the times when we do want to go out!

Hope you find some of this helpful!

milliemonster

some fab ideas on here!! I might have to have a go at some myself!!!

Damita

Have people over, I personally wish I had the time or the money to go out (full-time uni student! All studying no play!), but I meet up with my closest friends once a month and see my best friend for afternoon every week

Watch DVDs.. spend time with your partner, my favourite nights are in watching Supernatural eating dinner with my partner

firesidemaid

this may be on the offers board but i just found it on hotukdeals (fab site).

during half term week Hollywood Bowl are doing games for just 1p for up to 12 people.

one game per day, you have to book online and go between 09.00 - 09.30 am.

obviously they'll want you to spend more while you're there. but if you're savvy just do this and then go home and makes some easy cakes to have with your 'free' drinks at home!

Jacks_xxx

I agree with Burlesque Babe (as I very often do! ) Even amongst my "spend big, live it up" circle to whom £60 a head is a "quiet night" - people living beyond their means or frittering their cash are seen as real idiots these days.

And only a very small minority of f*ckwits and the terminal ostriches with their heads in the sand haven't made some adjustments to their spending to reflect the global financial crisis.

My friends really struggled to understand when we first made changes but now they say that as with the internet, Facebook, skinny jeans, and trying to be "Green" I was just way ahead of the rest of the pack! :rotfl: (Bless 'em. You see! I'm not poor - I'm just an early adopter! )

I used to work for a big pub restaurant company who never ever did promotions and discounts because their over 30 and over 30k customer base didn't need or want them to - and in research the customers said they actually avoided discounted special deals in favour of spending a tenner on a burger cos "you get what you pay for".

All that has changed in quite a short time and the same company is actively promoting two for one deals - and the old customers are using them.

(I'm meeting a new friend on Saturday, and we're using one - and she's getting a discount train fare as well! )

I read somewhere last week that it's estimated that 20 million people have cut down on their social spending because of the current economic climate. That's got to be a large proportion of the adult population.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1074113/The-bitter-truth-credit-crunch---20million-Britons-stopped-going-pub.html

The "friend" :mad: who called your wife a boring cow is not someone whose opinion you should take into account when looking after your family finances - in *my* opinion.

Love Jacks xxx

Burlesque_Babe

awwwwww, shucks Jacks.............blush..........

xx