Daughter going to stay with her Dad - advice needed

Mr_Green_Genes

It's fascinating that there's so much supportive 'girly'-type stuff on this thread so I thought I'd inject a different slant.

I am a single parent, I'm a man and I didn't f**k up with either of my 2 children (don't faint away ladies). They both got top notch A-levels, both went to top-notch universities and both are doing brilliantly (and for the avoidance of doubt are a boy and a girl - ok, no longer boy and girl but you know what I mean).

I hope anniehanlon is completely wrong - I was so miserable whilst my 2 were with their mother and so incredibly happy when they came back home to me. I will never be happy to see the back of my 2, other than in the nicest possible way - to see them making their own lives is what I really want because it means that I (and their mother too, especially when were together) have done something right. On the other hand, a glass of wine always helps, especially when it all looks a bit bleak so cheers!!!

torikate, I can understand your post though. It was so difficult for all of us, for so many reasons, I imagine mainly down to me, because children are actually more flexible than adults I think.

Ladies, some of us blokes can do it too, and I reckon it's more difficult for us because everyone expects us to screw up. I lost track of the number of occasions on which I got asked about how I'd be able to cope with "... you know ... those women things ... er ... um ... well you know". Quite hilarious actually, well, in retrospect anyway.

It's not about men or women, is it? Shouldn't it be about children?

enemes

Mr_Green_Genes wrote: »

It's fascinating that there's so much supportive 'girly'-type stuff on this thread so I thought I'd inject a different slant.

I am a single parent, I'm a man

Hey Mr GG ... I'm a single parent, I'm a man .... too!

Long time no see ... hows you?

Loopy_Girl

Mr_Green_Genes wrote: »

It's fascinating that there's so much supportive 'girly'-type stuff on this thread so I thought I'd inject a different slant.

I am a single parent, I'm a man and I didn't f**k up with either of my 2 children (don't faint away ladies). They both got top notch A-levels, both went to top-notch universities and both are doing brilliantly (and for the avoidance of doubt are a boy and a girl - ok, no longer boy and girl but you know what I mean).

I hope anniehanlon is completely wrong - I was so miserable whilst my 2 were with their mother and so incredibly happy when they came back home to me. I will never be happy to see the back of my 2, other than in the nicest possible way - to see them making their own lives is what I really want because it means that I (and their mother too, especially when were together) have done something right. On the other hand, a glass of wine always helps, especially when it all looks a bit bleak so cheers!!!

torikate, I can understand your post though. It was so difficult for all of us, for so many reasons, I imagine mainly down to me, because children are actually more flexible than adults I think.

Ladies, some of us blokes can do it too, and I reckon it's more difficult for us because everyone expects us to screw up. I lost track of the number of occasions on which I got asked about how I'd be able to cope with "... you know ... those women things ... er ... um ... well you know". Quite hilarious actually, well, in retrospect anyway.

It's not about men or women, is it? Shouldn't it be about children?

Sweeping assumptions all over the place there GG which I am disappointed about as usually you give a balanced thought. Maybe you are still stung by the spat you were having on another thread....we don't all hate men on this board - we just hate the men who don't/won't/can't/shant provide for their kids emotionally and financially.

I know Enemes is a lone male parent and my own Dad actually fought for custody of me when I was 12.

Doesn't matter on your sex so long as you provide a loving secure home - not to me anyway;)

Mr_Green_Genes

enemes wrote: »

Hey Mr GG ... I'm a single parent, I'm a man .... too!

Long time no see ... hows you?

Things are good my friend. Like I just posted, the children are just doing amazingly well and my ex and I even get along (sort of) these days. What's very important, I think I don't have to deal with the Cr*p Shoddy Animals ever again. What could be better than that?

How about you?

scooby1001

Enjoy the time while she is not with you because chances are she will be back. My son went to live with his dad 3 times. 2 times it lasted 2 months and the 3rd time it lasted 8 months and both father and son HATED living together.The grass is not always greener on the other side of the fence.

Loopy_Girl

No it's not. But when you are young and foolish you don't know that do you and kids have to make that discovery on their own.

Hurtful for the parties involved but that's part of being a parent I guess.

Mr_Green_Genes

Loopy_Girl wrote: »

Sweeping assumptions all over the place there GG which I am disappointed about as usually you give a balanced thought. Maybe you are still stung by the spat you were having on another thread....we don't all hate men on this board - we just hate the men who don't/won't/can't/shant provide for their kids emotionally and financially.

LG - another old comrade. I really must stop doing this because I seem to be upsetting people I don't want to upset (as well as some I'm not so bothered about!). How are you?

Btw, I'm not actually stung by that - I put myself out there and got bits of me shot at. If you can't stand the heat ...

Anyway, just put it down to being demob happy, I'm about to go on holiday, so I apologise to absolutely everybody (except those 2 in Plymouth who deserve everything they get).

McKneff

sorry mr green, there was no offence meant, it was very tongue in cheek, i was just trying to make the op feel a bit better, but i shouldnt have done it at the expense of people like yourself whether male or female.

my father in law who is no longer with us brought up a two, three and four year old, single handledly, till they were in there young teens, married again, split up andbrought up another two youngsters on his own. He worked full time, He sewed, cooked, cleaned, made christmas cakes, baked, made
shirts, trousers even coats or his young family on an old hand singer sewing machine. he made his only daughters wedding dress and the bridesmaid dresses with no training so you see i have great respect for single parents. the two, three and four year olds are now 63, 64 and 65 and good old dad only died 2 years ago. my best wishes to all
and have a nice holiday

Loopy_Girl

Mr_Green_Genes wrote: »

LG - another old comrade. I really must stop doing this because I seem to be upsetting people I don't want to upset (as well as some I'm not so bothered about!). How are you?

Btw, I'm not actually stung by that - I put myself out there and got bits of me shot at. If you can't stand the heat ...

Anyway, just put it down to being demob happy, I'm about to go on holiday, so I apologise to absolutely everybody (except those 2 in Plymouth who deserve everything they get).

I wasn't saying it to be nasty, far from it. It was a genuine 'it's not like you'. Men get a fair bashing on here so you are quite within your rights to voice your thoughts.
I upset the applecart on here on a regular basis it seems but I'm always honest!!!

Enjoy your holiday x

Loopy_Girl

Mr_Green_Genes wrote: »

LG - another old comrade

AHEM...less of the old kind sir!!!! I'm a very youthful 33;)