Help, required over housing

ceridwen

..and that thought has certainly crossed my mind too....ie changing the locks behind his back and I have done that myself when occasion demanded (BUT....custody of children wasnt in question...I only had myself to take into account.)

On the other hand....you need to be seen to be a "reasonable" person and "whiter than white" - so doing that might give him some grounds to quote against you to state that you arent!

Make sure that - no matter what he does - you are seen to be doing "the right thing".

Have you got a relative who can come and stay with you for the duration as company/moral support?

Errata

Melc234 wrote: »

Thanks for all comments, hes threating to get kids took off me, if i dont give him the house. Ive no friends as hes stopped me from seeing them. Hes not violent, just controlling

It looks like this is the evidence you need for the Housing Association to understnd that the relationship has broken down because it's domestic abuse.Talk to the the Housing Association.

DeeDee74

im not sure if housing assosiations are different to council but when i was having prob's with my ex and he refused to leave property.. the council had no power's to do anything as it was in joint names,
my ex was violent and the only way thay said thay would rehouse me was if i had to go to woman's refuge..
i know it's not what u wana hear and i hope other councils HA work differently in other area's but mine was waste time..

do hope things work out for you
dee x

Mojisola

Start making a diary of all the events like upsetting everyone til they are in tears. Contact the domestic violence website - controlling the family to that level is a form of abuse.

onlyroz

The person who normally gets custody of children is the one who has been the primary care giver. This is usually but not always the mother.

Paparika

I had a joint tenancy with the ex hubby.

he refused to leave etc, threats....

Once i went to the solicitor and she sent him a letter he then relented, realised that i meant business.
GL don't believe the twaddle he tells you, is he really able to cope with all the children? i doubt it if he is a control freak

xcat_girlx

Krystaltips wrote: »

Does he ever leave the house? I would sorely tempted to completley lock him out, double lock the door and leave the key in if you can't afford to get the locks changed... If he kicks off then call the police and get an injunction on him... Job done...

this is easier said than done! i tried to get my friend to take out an injunction against her ex partner for months, its a very long and complicated process.

xcat_girlx

Melc234 wrote: »

My partner and i have decided to go our seperate ways. We have 3 kids, one disabled, live in a housing association, joint tenacy. He is refusing to move out. Short version is he had us all in tears yesterday, dont want to put kids through any more upset. Ive not a lot of savings, as im a full time carer for my son. Is there any way, i can get rehoused. Dont want to go to a b and b, as son only sleep 2 hrs a night, so the other 2 wouldnt get a sleep. Please help, am sitting in tears again.

do you have any parents or family nearby who might be able to help out? maybe with caring for your other 2 children whilst you stay with your disabled son? might get them away from the bad atmosphere, even if just for a few hours.

otherwise, i would ring the HA asap.

Melc234

Ive not got any contact with my family, he stopped me having contact with them 6 yrs ago. Just feel really trapped. Hes went out this morning, but took babys carseat with him, so i cant get out.

xcat_girlx

Melc234 wrote: »

Ive not got any contact with my family, he stopped me having contact with them 6 yrs ago. Just feel really trapped. Hes went out this morning, but took babys carseat with him, so i cant get out.

this really is mental abuse

im sure if your family etc are still living in the same place, they will easily have you back in these circumstances.