The ultimate incentive to get debt free, can I do it by New Years?

Dinah93

Birdie85 wrote: »

I have a feeling our wedding will end up being a simple do at a registry office and a big party with a curry buffet! I hate the idea of paying £60 a head for reatives I never see to eat eat food they won't appreciate and talk about how I shouldn't be wearing white behind my back!

Sounds much better to me, who wants to pay for people who are strangers but happen to share a few genes to whinge that they have to get you a gift and travel half way across the country out of obligation, this way you get to only be with those who really matter to you

Birdie85

Dinah93 wrote: »

Sounds much better to me, who wants to pay for people who are strangers but happen to share a few genes to whinge that they have to get you a gift and travel half way across the country out of obligation, this way you get to only be with those who really matter to you

My thoughts exactly! But OH has a big family (his mum is one of 7!) and wants them all there and to put a big fancy show on for them... I barely know his Aunts and Uncles, who he claims to be so 'close' with! :rolleyes:

My mum keeps saying that if his parents want us to do a big wedding for all of his family then they can contribute but I can't see that happening! My parents have given us money towards the flat so I can't expect them to pay for the wedding therefore it has to be on a strict budget. Luckily I'm crafty so I'll be able to stretch our money!

Dinah93

I'm afraid given the oppertunity to pay a huge chunk off my flat/stay out of debt or spend a huge ammount on one day, I wouldn't hesitate for an instant. Weddings are very, very expensive things (one of many reasons why I dread having one), and the people who are most important in the whole palava are you and him, and there is absolutely no point spending such a stupid ammount on other people if one of you is unhappy. If his parents want to chip in then fair enough, but you've worked hard for your money, and I would be very, very upset/angry to have to pay out for people who neither of you have seen for years.

My friend is paying £9k for a sit down meal for 65, it terrifies me how much this would be for a 'big' family. Was on the radio only this morning that the AVERAGE (ie half are higher!) price for a wedding has now passed the £20k mark. If he wants all his family there he can have them, but at a less formal affair, or it can be smaller and formal, but there is going to be a life after the wedding, and you want to start it on the best possible foot, and being terrified about meeting the bills for that one day now in the dim and distant past isn't it.

Sorry, rant over, I just think weddings are stupidly expensive for just one day. It's the quality of the marriage that counts, not whether you start it off in a place built in 1402 with a £2k fruit cake!

Birdie85

Dinah93 wrote: »

Sorry, rant over, I just think weddings are stupidly expensive for just one day. It's the quality of the marriage that counts, not whether you start it off in a place built in 1402 with a £2k fruit cake!

You're so right! I used to want the big fairytale wedding, and if I won the lottery I'd do it but as it stands I'm broke and the most important thing is a marriage, not a wedding. OH has said that he'd rather have a cheapo wedding and a brilliant honeymoon, as you say, we're the most important people so surely 2 weeks of memories together is worth more than 1 day when you're so stressed out because you're worrying about everyone enjoying themselves that you miss most of it! I'd never spend anywhere near £20k on one day! That is insane!

Lara44

Aww thanks guys that's made me cheer up - dodgy hug for everyone :grouphug:

I've spent the day working on my college study proposal, so making a bit of progress there. No proposal forthcoming from OH either, you are right Dinah I should step back a bit.

On the wedding note - isn't the average wage in the UK £22,000? So the average wedding costs a year's wages? Yikes.

My cousin got engaged just before Xmas. When my Mum called yesterday she was having a whinge about my Auntie being wedding obsessed. The wedding is a year and a half away, but apparently my cousin has started growing her hair! They are also booking the photographer now - a snip at £3k :eek:

clearmydebts

Birdie85 wrote: »

You're so right! I used to want the big fairytale wedding, and if I won the lottery I'd do it but as it stands I'm broke and the most important thing is a marriage, not a wedding. OH has said that he'd rather have a cheapo wedding and a brilliant honeymoon, as you say, we're the most important people so surely 2 weeks of memories together is worth more than 1 day when you're so stressed out because you're worrying about everyone enjoying themselves that you miss most of it! I'd never spend anywhere near £20k on one day! That is insane!

Wow, what fantastic news!!! You must be thrilled. My little sister got enaged 2 weeks ago so there is great excitement in my family at the moment! She is the last to get married and I can't wait to help her plan it!

As a married woman, the only advice I can give is to make sure that the day is exactly the one you want. Don't get swayed by tradition and other people's expectatations.

clearmydebts

LaraHoust wrote: »

Aww thanks guys that's made me cheer up - dodgy hug for everyone :grouphug:

I've spent the day working on my college study proposal, so making a bit of progress there. No proposal forthcoming from OH either, you are right Dinah I should step back a bit.

On the wedding note - isn't the average wage in the UK £22,000? So the average wedding costs a year's wages? Yikes.

My cousin got engaged just before Xmas. When my Mum called yesterday she was having a whinge about my Auntie being wedding obsessed. The wedding is a year and a half away, but apparently my cousin has started growing her hair! They are also booking the photographer now - a snip at £3k :eek:

Hi Lara,

Sorry you had a rough day. Hope your feeling a bit better soon.

Birdie85

Thanks CMD, and Lara, I can't believe your cousin is paying £3k for a photographer! That's ridiculous! Oh dear, I'm far too tight to have a wedding, luckily it's going to be a while until I have to worry about it!

Tete_en_l'Air

Hi girls and CONGRATULATIONS BIRDIE!!! How exciting!! I totally agree with whoever said they'd rather have a fantastic honeymoon than a posh wedding, I just don't like the idea of spending that kind of money on food for myself, let alone the distant rellies!

Just got back this afternoon from our dirty... ahurrm... romantic weekend in Buxton. Had planned a lovely long walk on Sunday but this was scuppered by fog and drizzle so we ended up spending most of our time in the sauna and pool. Had a fab time just getting away together though and I feel all refreshed and happy now. Also managed to get a few more lengths in to go towards my challenge!

I hadn't realised I'd been on NIM's dooyoo either, I just click on people randomly sometimes and have a read. Now I know who he is though I'll go on later and rate your churning to go towards the camera fund

Hope you're doing ok Lara, I'm so glad I'm not a student anymore I have to say! Have a hot bath and and early night, all will feel better in the morning!

Birdie85

Glad your dirty/romantic weekend was good Tete! What a good girl you are to get some lengths in for your challenge too!