ex and would be ex-gamblers support thread

cantcope

Hi Glen,

if you read through the whole of this thread you'll see we are all the same and there are plenty of sites you can download. I personally use k9 which is a free child block but has the option to block allg ambling and gambling related sites. It takes minutes to download but you need someone to set the password for you, OR, close your eyes and stamp your fingers on the the keyboard so you dont know what it is. I'd recommend getting someone else to do it though.

Your debt at the moment is £0. Leave it any longer and it will be thousands. Stop now while you are not in debt. Life is great without gambling.
You can still get the highs and lows, you'll just be able to cope with them like thousands of others that dont NEED a bet to cope wtih them

Good luck x

moneyspender1981

Hi All,


I have used this site for a number of years mainly to pay off my debt but now I'm looking for support through my Gambling.

Me:-

Well I have been in debt since I was 18 and slowly but surely managed to pay it off. I have a goodish job earning approx 34k I have a loan for 10k and well now two payday loans.

I started gambling in the beggining because I didnt really have anything... I used to pay so much out that what little I had I would gamble in the hope the big one came in and I could be debt free.

Over the years I got better jobs but still gambled, I ahve missed out on alot of my youth due to debt and I guess gambling.

I now live with my GF and her Daughter and we have a nice house etc. I am fortunate that due to being in debt at an early age I cant get credit so don't really ahve any creidit cards etc. I have approx 950 a month on paper which is my own after paying bills.

I have a 10k loan that my gf got and mainly was due to me gambling etc. I have also 2 payday loans for 1k in total becuase I ahve gambled.

I know i am now lucky to have some spare cash ( recent) but never see the bennefit as i just gamble it all away and never have anything to show for it.

I am so carefull with money when buying things yet when gambling I dont care. The other day I got a payday loan as was skint but ended up putting it all in the roulette machine. got another for 400 and did the same I just cant learn.

My GF has helped me out before but when she found out last time she told me near enough that next time it's through. My argument is that I have som much free money, but I dont really as I gamble it all away.

I'm letter her down and my step daughter as we have to be carefull with money where as with my free money we should be able to ahve treats etc.

I am now trying to repay back the loans and not tell my gf, I appreciate that telling her is prob the right thing but it would be over.

I am trying not to gamble at all, lotto excluding. £10 a month. it's really difficult as never new how addicted I was.... I do sometimes win and treat them and ahve big plans but then just gamble it all.

When I think back of all the things I could have bought.

So today is the day where it stops.....

If anyone is in the same boat... good to hear from you guys.. or any advice.

I plan on doing a weekly update, so follow me through and hopefully mayhelp some others

GeorgeUK

Hi moneyspender

Hope you're still keeping away from the gambling. Are you updating on a diary here, or was it supposed to be on this thread?

When i stopped, it was difficult to avoid places that had gambling or that would make me thing about gambling. Yes, it is difficult and the best option is to go cold turkey - you can't spend a little on gambling to try to wean yourself out of it. With problem gamblers, there is a lack of control - there will be a certain point where we will not be able to stop or we over react to a situation. We cannot trust our judgement when it comes to gambling so it needs to be stopped dead.

Have you identified what triggers you to gamble?
I know it is habit forming, but i discovered that i was using gambling as a crutch. Have a read of a few of my posts at the start of this thread and you will understand what i mean. When i was depressed, bored, angry or just greedy i gambled. I had to develop coping mechanisms so that i could deal with the problem or remove myself from a situation or mindset. Until i did that, i couldn't really deal with the gambling problem.

Hope you and everyone else are okay.

Triggles

Hello there. I've decided I want to stop spending money in online gambling sites. I don't spend an astronomical amount, like some of the thousands at a time some have done. But I spend more than I would like (up to £100+ in a month sometimes) and would like to stop spending. I like to play the free bingo on two sites, as well as free games on the Iceland site to win Iceland vouchers (free groceries is good, right?). Does anyone ever just quit depositing and go from there? I know that sounds silly. I know for a fact that if I just say "that's it.. I'm not going on those sites again" that I will slip quickly. I understand the logic behind going cold turkey and blocking them entirely. I've gone in an put my spending limits to £0 which means I can not deposit, but can still play the free bingo. I am hoping to try that for a month or so and see how I do. Every time I want to deposit, I'm going to log in to my bank and transfer the tenner I would have spent into my savings account. I'm hoping that it will help me see how the money adds up. I plan on stopping here each day to keep me accountable. I hope nobody minds this. I don't want to put this on my regular blog, as my DH is very "oh, it's just a tenner and you don't spend money on anything else" and I really would like to break this habit, before it becomes quite seriously damaging to our bank account.

cantcope

Hi Triggles. Well done on realising that you have a habit that could gradually get worse. See how you go just playing the free games but as soon as you feel tempted to deposit any money then i would advise putting a block on.

keep us updated. x

Triggles

Thanks. Doing okay today. so far so good....

Tr@cker

Ive only had one day gambling in the last 18 months-in January this year-and it was expensive. Prior to that i gambled most days of the week for 25 years though i wasn't a compulsive gambler.

Even though I knew pretty much all there was to know about my chosen betting medium-the gee-gee's-i still steadily lost and it worked out at around £2.5k a year.

I still get occasional offers of ' free ' bets especially from betfair where i did most of my gambling but these are of course just to tempt you back in.

All that !!!!!! about them promoting responsible gambling. They wouldn't give a toss if you lost EVERYTHING you owned.

Im hoping the recession puts some of these internet betting sites out of business. The ability to bet on-line with plastic is the worst thing ever allowed in this Country its caused misery to so many.

Triggles

Doing okay so far, I think. I did win £15 on free bingo and played that through, so no damage as free money. But next time, I want to just withdraw it and not play it through. Small subgoal, I suppose. Better than playing it.

riquelme

bump- hows everyone

all ok here.

in my opinion people need to be careful playing free sites, the intention is to tempt you in.

keep posting people and stay strong

cantcope

Hi Riq glad to hear you are well

Have to agree about the free sites if there is an option to win money. I didnt realise this when i posted.

Bit tough going here but not on gambling front. Just coming to terms with helping hubby to be work through his debt etc... at least i've been there and come through the other side so i can help him and know how he's feeling.

Keep strong everyone.

Just for today i will not gamble x