This is the new me!!!

Snaggles

Hiya Sea :wave:

It's lovely to see you back, so many people seem to have disappeared recently, so I'm very glad you're not one of them.

You do sound very positive and hopeful for the future - good luck and remember we are all here to support you.

Sea78

Hi

Had a bit of a wobble yesterday - he's now gutting DD's room and painting it all - with paint I then have to buy, but she is loving the changes so far!!

I've got a couple of hours to myself now as he's taken the kids over to his mum's which is nice. He's being very calm and it's all going well, which rather worries me, as I'm waitin gfor it to all blow up really. But maybe that's me being silly.

Been ont he entitled.to website - has a large amount of tax credit for me and even larger if he took it for his wage, which I just can't see being realistic, so will ring them up later.

Looking for a car at the moment - max budget of £500 (hah!!) but I only *need* it for a year, and then DS will start school so I won't need to take him to the childminders. I am not going to move chlidminders, she is amazing and I'd rather eat value pasta for a year than give that up!!

Today my CJ arrived from ISOM, and thank you sooooo much to all those involved - it made me well up, it's just beautiful. Interesting to see just how much my scrapping style has changed since we started as well!

Well, better go tidy so there isn't an atmosphere when I get home!

Sea xxxx

taxi73

You are best claiming the tax credits so that you can put the child minding figure in as no doubt you will end up paying for it.Also if you need before and afterschool care claim for that.Tax credit pays 70% of the childcare bill.
I worry about him claiming it as you need to be in control of the finances and to be sure that your childcare etc is paid for.Can you seriously trust him to hand the money over to you or to pay the childminder?...if the answer is no then I wouldn't allow him.Sorry for sounding harsh but I only have your interest at heart.
I'm sure you have had problems with money with him before.What does your mum think?...huggles to you and the kiddies xxx

taxi73

Are you ok Sea?

Sea78

Hey
Yes, thanks - meeting a friend for lunch today so that'll be nice. OH is now saying he's not going to move out til we have something legal sorted that means he'll definitely get his money - he thinks I'm going to screw him over. I need him to go so I can get the finances sorted - argh!!

Money situation is shocking - can't really bear to consider it today, so will look at it all tomorrow. It's OH's birthday tomorrow - should be so much fun

hypno06

Have you started the legal process at all? Might be worth setting the wheels in motion if you have not already done so in order that you can get things sorted asap finance wise.....perhaps he will move out once he knows that things are actually "happening".

Other than that I have no ideas on these sorts of things, so can't offer you anything other than positive vibes and those dodgy hugs!

Have a good lunch - it will be good to take yourself away from it all for a couple of hours x

CAFCGirl

Hey Hun,

Just wanted to jump in, although a bit late and say welcome back xx

taxi73

I don't know the answers Sea but have you been to see a solicitor yet?..they can advice you of what's best I guess...keep your chin up ..you are doing fantastically well.Hugs from here.

chevalier

Hi Sea
He may just be trying to stay because he wants to. Is it you only who wants it to end? It is a big change for him to accept, whereas you have already known about it and prepared for it mentally for x time.

Ref the tax credits, logically it makes sense it he earns less for him to claim it BUT, if there is a child care element, then I would make sure that he sets up a direct debit to the child minder to pay it straight over to her. That way it can't get used for other purposes.

And I guess you need to start doing the paperwork for it. Hope that you can get through politely
chev

taxi73

How are you today Sea?