Single and in debt.

Buffythedebtslayer

right I am off to bed, well to finish marking first and then go to bed!

xxx

TDQO

Nooo I've missed you all again, stupid work internet not playing ball! Night night...

Bowski_1011

I was here TDQO but only just realise you are and now you're probably gone lol

Oh I'm thinking of going to the Manchester meet too! It's only a couple of weeks before I go to Benidorm though, that's the only problem. But it shouldn't cost me too much coz I dont need to drink and I could drive home so don't need to shell out for accommodation. I don't think I could go on my own though, would have to take my sister along !

Bowski_1011

Well I think I'll go to bed now. I'm not tired as I spent most of the day in bed. DD slept out lastnight so I didn't need to get up this morning. I lay in bed reading and nodding off between chapters! But I must go to bed else I'll never get up for work in the morning.

Hope everyone has a good week

TDQO

Grrr the internet at work was playing up all day, I left early after I'd waited 20mins for one page to load and it froze completely... Hopefully it'll work tomorrow or I'm going to start throwing things! I'm working on a research project so am using the internet solely atm, without it I have zilch to do!

Paulgonnabedebtfree

skint_spice wrote: »

I don't know that they do get lower, you get used to being on your own and less likely to give it up for imperfection! although personality is more important now and looks less (although not unimportant).:o

You may have a point there. I'm 51, never been married and never had any children - though have co-habitated with two women (at different times I might add ) . Although my life is far from perfect, it would take someone VERY special (to me anyway) for me to give up being single. A lot of my current debt issues are because I didn't fight my corner very well with the last co-habitee (it's called saying "no") . We were a bad match really. Neither of us were bad people but it can seem that way if you are pulling in opposite directions most of the time. Fortunately, I'm not a person who has become cynical about relationships. The trouble is that I sometimes feel that I get more choosy and less desirable by the year which does seem to narrow down the choices a bit . I would certainly want to reduce my debt levels substantially before I went down the road of a meaningful relationship. That might sound funny to much younger people but being 51 is only getting older if you allow yourself to think old (not that there's anything wrong with getting older because it's a heck of a lot better than the alternative). I love life but am having to find cheaper ways of enjoying. The best things are free but a few of the others things wouldn't go amiss as well .

Paulgonnabedebtfree

sarahb123 wrote: »

Same here on all counts. You forgot to mention your own sitting room to keep your books in, with big comfy chairs and a coal fire. Where you must never be disturbed!

I had a partner like that. The trouble was she wanted her own bedroom too LOL. I ended up being virtually a lodger while paying more into the household than most husbands. Even the cat got to sleep with her . Can you imagine being jealous of a cat ?
It was like I had more responsibilities than I could cope with but no rights whatsoever. Relationships are about teamwork IMO - not WW3.
I don't want to sound bitter because I did get over it after a while - and there is a funny side to such things once a few years have passed and you can look back.

Paulgonnabedebtfree

SuSu1871 wrote: »

My friend moved in with her now-husband when she was in her early 20s and they had their own bedrooms. They always slept in his room, but she kept her room in case one of them had a cold or an early start the next morning. Now that's a good idea methinks!

That happened with my ex partner and myself. The problem with it is that it's very important not to let the sleeping apart bit become a habit. The relationship can lose a certain amount of its intimacy IMO. I'm not just talking about sex here either. There is something more intimate about waking up and falling asleep together even if you're going through a phase where only hugs and cuddles are on the menu - or even if you're having a phase where you're feeling a bit hacked off with each other (well let's be real - it can be like that sometimes).

eco

Hiya,
i finally got my act together and cracked on painting my stairs, it hopefully will be done by the weekend, and I was going to come on here last night to catch up but I got a chinese to celebrate my hard work and ate too much and couldn't move, but it was nice.
I'll be back later to make a proper contribution to the chat on been single and not wanting to be.

PinkTwirl

SunderlandBlackCat wrote: »

Yep, if anything I'm less likely to settle now than when I was in my twenties as I already knw settling doesn't work. I also find I'm becoming increasingly jealous of my "space" the longer I live on my own.

I struggle to imagine living with anyone else now.

Yes, settling is impossible (for me). I wouldn't have a problem living with a partner again though, I wouldn't mind sharing things again.