Breast feeding, pros and cons

sarymclary

I successfully BF all 4 of my boys until they were each about 2yrs. I initially found it quite difficult with my 1st, had cracked nipples (nipple shields were a life saver) and I was able to express well too, although the baby wouldn't take a bottle teet, just loved mummy! However, once I learnt how to properly get the baby to latch on, and if you get the help of member of the NCT or someone in the hospital before mum & baby come home, they'll show your partner that the baby has to take a really massive gobfull of breast to be fully latched on, but then the baby will heartily feed away, and you don't get sore.

All my boys fed really well, slept well, and gained weight as expected. There wasn't the bad tummy aches that my sister's bottle fed babies had at about the same time, and nappies were not nearly as smelly, if a bit alarming in their appearance like piccalilli!!

I would definitely encourage any new mum to try to persevere, feeding can be done very discretely in public (I used to pull up my top just enough, place baby to the breast, then drape a muslin towel over baby to conceal all) and I never felt self-conscious because I chose my places/seating appropriately. John Lewis and Boots have feeding rooms too.

You do have to take on board the vast majority of feeding responsibility as a BF mum, but my DH used to do nearly all nappy changes when he was around, and helped me out alot when I was stuck feeding for up to an hour at a time. Provided you deal with all of the chores a new baby brings along, and work as a team things will be fine. I definitely found BF helped me lose my baby weight, and it helps your uterus contract faster after the birth too. It can make you more tired, but then you're usually exhausted with a new baby anyway. I also found laying down in bed feeding helped me to lightly doze once baby was a bit older too, rather than sitting in the chair in the nursery, nodding off!

Most of all I would say it helps to know exactly what you want to do yourself, and to have belief in yourself as a mum. Sometimes easier said than done I know. There is support out there to be found, and BF advisors who will come to your home to help. I'm in Lincolnshire too, so don't know if you're local to my area where I had support.

Good luck, and CONGRATULTIONS!!!!!:T :T :T

bylromarha

Have BF 2 until 1 year old.

Pros, easy, quick, cheap, no sterilising, good stuff for baby

Cons: HATED getting my boobs out in public. Didn't like night feeds being solely my responsibility (OH did use expressed bottles at times, but by the time he'd got up, warmed up the milk baby in screaming fit and didn't settle so easily after feeding-me giving the feed in the night meant it was a drowsy feed and baby settled back down with a full tummy.) Didn't let hubby touch my boobs at all during sex as it immediately turned me off by reminding me of my cow like status.

Didn't love it, didn't hate it-just a practical and cheap way to feed baby overall.

Whilst I agree mum should get final say, I think you have the right OP to share your opinions and thoughts on the matter (in an encouraging way obviously) I'd certainly speak up if hubby was feeding the kids apples every night. As a parent I get a right to speak up over my childrens diet. You are the father and your opinion should have some value to the discussion. i wanted to give up BF after 3 weeks due to the cons listed above, and OHs encouraging words reminding me that BF was best for long term health of baby and me, and to give it one more day (several times) and see how I felt tomorrow got me through a low patch where I just couldn't contemplate BF anymore-and I'm SO glad he did.

melancholly

BernadetteN wrote: »

Times have changed. I know a set of twins now aged 12 who were born at 22 and 24 weeks who were "breastfed" with expressed milk, but don't rely on anectdotal evidence such as this, but do rely on the fact that it's normal practice now for premature babies to receive their mother's milk, with the mum expressing in a rather undignified manner.

my point was mainly that no mother should be made to feel guilty for how they choose to feed their child. the specifics of how early milk can be produced aren't really the issue as far as i can see it.

Only_Girl_in_the_House

Just wanted to add my tuppenceworth.

I breastfed all of my 3 children until they were 2 and I absolutely loved every minute of it and was really sad when I finally called it a day with number 3.

One point I'd like to make to people saying that NOT being able to give the baby to anyone else to feed is a disadvantage - actually it's really good that, especially in the first few weeks, there is something that makes you sit down and have a rest.

When people visit you with the baby, they want to do the nice cuddly stuff like feeding while you wear yourself out doing jobs. Instead, ask them to help with jobs while you do the feeding. It's one way of making us give our bodies time to heal after childbirth.

Just a thought.

Maz

There's no right or wrong answer to this one, it's a very individual choice and sometimes the choice is taken out of your hands. For example, if the mother isn't producing enough milk, it's painful or if the baby doesn't latch on etc.

From my own experience, baby 1 was a guzzler and would feed all day without interruption if I let her but baby 2 wasn't really that bothered, to the extent that I had boobies like zeppelins and had to express loads and got mastitis! With baby 2, I experienced the pain of my uterus contracting but I was told this was quite normal, especially with the second baby. (?) Felt like being in labour again to me but it didn't last long. Neither of them took to bottles though and both grew up to be healthy. Big pluses of BF are that it costs nowt, no preperation, your womb returns to normal quicker, you burn fat (yay!) and your baby gets the necessary antobodies to stave off illness and boost their immune system. Women used to employ wet nurses if they couldn't or didn't want to BF but I don't think that's in common practice anymore!

I know some men will disagree with this but that what you've got boobies for!

I know a lot of mums who chose to bottle feed and tbh, their little 'uns aren't any worse off for it, only their mums and dads that are a bit more skint! Plus, it means that someone else can take over if you need a break.

As long as you're giving your baby what they require for the first year or so of their lives, does it really matter?

tbh, I was never embrassed feeding my two in public, you just find somewhere discreet and drape a towel or something over the 'offending' bits! Always feel a bit gobsmacked that some people object about a mother feeding her child but make no objection whatsoever about top shelf mags etc.

SarahFx

I think it's really good that someone so young and also a male is even considering the breastfeeding issue. There is a pretty low take up rate of breastfeeding in young mums for one reason and another, mostly peer pressure and lack of support I think.

I'm still breastfeeding my 7 month old son and have to say it's one of the best things I've ever done. He is so healthy (had cause to go to the doctors once in his life so far) and we have such a fantastic bond which I think is largely down to breastfeeding. I had a difficult start with it but I was completely determined this was something I was going to do despite the times when I wanted to give up because of the pain of the early days (Lansinoh is your saviour!) There are a small percentage of women who cannot breastfeed but it is a very small percentage and if she really wants to do it, chances are she will.

I would imagine your partner will be offered the chance to attend a Breastfeeding Workshop when she is a bit further on in her pregnancy where she will get the chance to speak to real breastfeeding mothers who will go through the pros and cons with her. It would really be worth her going along and I'm sure you could go too.

inaspin_3

Pros: Free, good for the baby (even if its just the first few days), no waiting for the bottle to warm up with a crying baby! That's just to name a few!
Cons: Leak quite a bit at times... but that does die down after a while. Can be painful and it's not always easy!

I've bf my daughter for 3 & 1/2 months so far. I have been through the highs and the lows (mastitis, sore nipples, etc) but I love the closeness I have with my baby girl. I wasn't too keen on the idea of breastfeeding at first, mainly due to showing my boobs off to people, being told it hurts and the fact it meant I had to do all night feeds, therefore I'd be the sleep deprived one! I told myself I would try it, I did and now wouldn't look back, though I would have struggled without my partners support and encouragement!

I think it's great that your looking into it, if your partner doesn't like the idea now though, i wouldn't rule it out, when she holds her little baby, she may change her mind completely.

Good luck with it all.

inaspin_3

Pros: Free, good for the baby (even if its just the first few days), no waiting for the bottle to warm up with a crying baby! That's just to name a few!
Cons: Leak quite a bit at times... but that does die down after a while. Can be painful and it's not always easy!

I've bf my daughter for 3 & 1/2 months so far. I have been through the highs and the lows (mastitis, sore nipples, etc) but I love the closeness I have with my baby girl. I wasn't too keen on the idea of breastfeeding at first, mainly due to showing my boobs off to people, being told it hurts and the fact it meant I had to do all night feeds, therefore I'd be the sleep deprived one! I told myself I would try it, I did and now wouldn't look back, though I would have struggled without my partners support and encouragement!

I think it's great that your looking into it, if your partner doesn't like the idea now though, i wouldn't rule it out, when she holds her little baby, she may change her mind completely.

Good luck with it all.

gorgeous_gwen

I fed DS until he was somewhere in his third year and I have to say I would never consider formula feeding. The nutritional factors are an outright winner for me, as well as the sheer convenience, when DS was very little I frequently used to feed him half asleep in the night and his dad would put him back in his moses basket/cot, and it's great as a comforter for when baby is upset/tired/distressed/etc, I must admit I used to wonder how parents of ff babies used to comfort them (sounds bizarre but anyone who's had a breastfed baby may understand!)

Also DS is vegetarian so even if I had've considered ff, he'd only have been able to have certain formulas (eg soya) as the mainstream brands have fish in them (this used to be the case and I understand still is?)

3onitsway

I fed DS until he was 8 months ( i had to go back to work full time), and found it really easy - he fed well, slept well, and lost loads of weight!

I was expecting to find it just as easy with No.2, DD born 3 years later and it was the total opposite. Sore boobs, blistered nipples, feeding constantly etc etc. I carried on for 6 months, but i dont remember anything of those 6 months - i was walking round like a zombie!!

No.3 is due in February and i plan to try again and see how it goes.

I'd advise your gf to try it! If it works it works, if not, no worries.