Breast feeding, pros and cons

PeskyPenguin

Lincsdan, if you do come back to this thread (which I know I wouldn't do after the Sermons on the Mount on their soapboxes have had their say), congratuations to you both and try to be supportive of your partner whatever she decides.

Luckily for me, I only ever encounter people who have such opinionated views about BFing on this site, never from my MW's, HV's, friends or family so I hope your partner's experience is the same.

bylromarha

PeskyPenguin wrote: »

Luckily for me, I only ever encounter people who have such opinionated views about BFing on this site, never from my MW's, HV's, friends or family so I hope your partner's experience is the same.

Seriously?!

Our pregnancy notes had a box for the midwife to tick to ensure she'd spoken to the woman about why mum should try breastfeeding at the booking in visit, and again around 20 weeks and 35 weeks.

Our local council has posters everywhere, side of buses, billboards about the benefits of breastfeeding.

In our hospital ante-natal classes my friend said she was going to bottle feed from birth and the midwife publicly laid into her.

The post natal ward is covered in pictures of newborns suckling at the breast and telling mums why they should give BF a go, even if it is only for a few weeks.

At the 6 week check of my first my HV told me that she was glad I was still BF as so many people give up too easily and then listed all the benefits as to why I should continue.

Most of my friends, who'd breastfed themselves, were horrified when I began to talk to them about bottle feeding.

My advice to all my pregnant friends is don't feel bad if you go for the bottle-you can't get away from the fact it's easy to feel a bad mother if you don't choose BF as I certainly was swamped from all sides from early pregnancy that breast is best.

melancholly

PeskyPenguin wrote: »

Lincsdan, if you do come back to this thread (which I know I wouldn't do after the Sermons on the Mount on their soapboxes have had their say), congratuations to you both and try to be supportive of your partner whatever she decides.

Luckily for me, I only ever encounter people who have such opinionated views about BFing on this site, never from my MW's, HV's, friends or family so I hope your partner's experience is the same.

but the OP did ask what people thought the pros and cons were..... so opinions were kind of guarenteed?!

starbump

My baby is now over 12 months and we are still breast-feeding. The first 6-8 weeks were really quite painful. Paracetamol and homeopathic remedies helped with the pain. Expressing (hand or manual pump) a feed when sore also helped - my baby never had a problem with expressed milk in bottles, even at a few weeks old. After a few months, you can't express more than 2-4 ounces at any one time. This is normal. Baby extracts way more milk than a pump. If you want to share duties, I suggest mom does the feeds and dad does the nappies. Don't worry about teeth - baby won't really bite and there are lots of ways to stop them from trying. Alas, cannot say the same for rest of body - baby is happy to sink teeth into shoulders.

Pros: free, perfectly nutritionally balanced, less tiring (co-sleep so you don't have to get up for night feeds), nothing to forget when going out, baby poos allegedly less solid and smelly than infant formula fed baby poos, no need for any extra food or drink (including water) for 6 months, suitable as main drink (and lots of nutrition - "until one, food is for fun") for as long as you and baby are happy to continue, get your figure back quickly (the fat you stored up in pregnancy is turned into milk - otherwise you have to diet/exercise it off).

Cons: harder to share feeding duties, may feel uncomfy feeding in public (we express or feed in car), difficult and tiring if mom works (may not be able to express enough - electric pump may help, as will photo of baby and regular "pump" breaks to express).

Crispy_Ambulance

Pros - it is the very best food for a baby. Formula does not compare to breastmilk in anyway.

Also, it's free, always at the right temp, always available.

Cons - it might take a bit of perseverance to start with - but it is so worth sticking with and if you have a supportive partner, that is all the better.

And not being able to give the baby to someone else to feed is not a disadvantage. It allows the new mum to rest and spend time just enjoying her baby. Dads can do baths, change nappies, have cuddles etc.

Katgoddess

I have a 10 week old baby who is exclusively breastfed with the odd bottle of expressed milk. Lots of good advice above.

If you want your OH to breastfeed you can make sure she has all the correct information so she can make an informed decision for herself. But at the end of the day it is her choice and no one elses. I will probably have buns thrown at me but I think that breastfeeding is the most important decision a parent will make about their child's health and it is their responsibilty as a good parent to make an informed decision about it. (It's so important I've bolded it.) If after reading all the books/leaflets/websites, attending workshops and even trying bfing in the hospital where you will have support from the midwives, you decide that it's not for you then fair enough.

You need to know that for most women it isn't easy. I've had severe problems and it's only because I'm a stubborn lazy moo and have a supportive partner that I'm still breastfeeding at 10 weeks. It's a pain to sort out the odd bottle of expressed milk so I can't imagine doing it all the time.

I've had mastitis. Sore/cracked/bleeding nipples so bad that one of them has a chunk missing out of it and I don't know if it will ever look normal again. The let down reflex pain that is suppost to dissapear by two weeks has only just gone at 10 weeks. Pain so bad that I would dread my son waking up as I would spend the first 10 mins of each feed crying in agony. Feeding for an hour every two hours. My son *apparently* isn't gaining weight and I've had health visitors demanding that I use formula. I'm too embarrased to bf in public so far because of the pain so express a bottle or feed in the car or feeding room at shops.

A lot of this would put people off and I doubt I'm going to make it until 6 months, but we'll see. There are lots of positives for me which have all been mentioned previously. If your OH decides that she really wants to BF then she needs to be prepared for the worst otherwise she will give up.

As a supportive partner you need to be prepared to do EVERYTHING but feed the baby. Cooking, cleaning, nappies, winding etc. All your OH should be doing is nursing and sleeping. If she can manage it she should eat and drink while nursing so she can spend as much time as possible sleeping. Take as much time off as possible and when you do go back to work make sure there are plenty of sandwiches and other one handed food available for her to eat and drink.

Good luck.

lincsdan86

Hi again,

Sorry for not replying sooner but I have been busy with doing other things. We heard our babies heart beat the other day for the first time and it was great. Also managed to feel it moving around, so at the minute I am the happiest person in the world!

Thank you all for your advice and helpful tips. I'm sure my OH will get alot of information from these pages, good points and bad points, but whatever she chooses to do I will do my upmost to support her.

Thanks again

Lincsdan86

ginvzt

Good luck!!! And whatever you choose, the most important is that the baby is loved!

RoxieW

Hi there -just my side after breast feeding 2 babies.

The cons for me were being tied to baby 24/7 - small things like not being able to go get a haircut bothered me.
Having to do all the feeds - even when exhausted or ill. It is a lot of work and completely shattering at night if you have a baby like I did who wants it every 1 - 3 hours from birth till 7 months old.
Cant wear your nice normal underwired underwear.
Leaky boobs - I'd often dream that I was on a boat then wake up to find bed, sheets and hubby soaked in my milk. They'd also leak when out and about, not pleasant.
Feeling decidedly unsexy - your boobs go huge, leaky, hard and heavy and your forever plopping them out for a baby to suck on.
Society/other people - although professionals all agree breast feeding is best for baby, the reaction of other people when you have to feed in front of them is quite something else. I've been tutting and frowned at in public, asked to move in a cafe to where customers couldnt see me, and the worst was when we were amongst relatives or friends (dad, granddad etc bleurgh) - getting your breast out makes for an uncomfortable atmosphere. It was often suggested to me that I could go upstairs to feed - well I would have been there for the vast majority of time anyone visited and why should I be banished upstairs to sit alone and feed!

That said, the benefits outway the cons and I'm planning to feed baby number 3 due in February.

hayleyc_2

I have a 9 month old baby, and always planned to BF because of all the obvious benefits. It was very painful for the first 3 weeks, which I think it's important to be prepared for. I think the best way to look at it is to always assume you can and will BF but to read as much as possible so that you're prepared in case of any problems. I think some people underestimate how hard BFing can be in the first few weeks and give up just at the point when it should start getting easier.

The only 'con' I can think of with BFing is the fact that feeding is 100% reliant on the mother which can be exhausing at times, especially during the 1st 6 months before solids or water are introduced. When I say exhausing, I mean more mentally exhausing because you end up attached to the baby with no time to yourself. However, when you think of all the health benefits for Mum and baby I think it's a small price to pay. Also, on the plus side, it's a great way to get time to sit down and watch tv/read/go on the computer etc because you're not being lazy, you're feeding . I know some people successfully express milk and share feeding with their husbands/partners but I found it more hassle than it's worth. I can't see any benefit in getting my partner to feed expressed milk during the night as it's a million times easier to just lean over and BF in my sleep (we co-sleep). Most of the time my partner doesn't even wake up until the baby is really screaming (which is very rarely) so leaving him to do night feeding would just cause more stress than necessary.

I've BF in public many many times and never had any negative reaction. It's something I was nervous about when I was pregnant but I think by the time I'd been through the birth I lost some of my inhibitions!

Good luck with the pregnany and your baby

Hayley