Breast feeding, pros and cons

galvanizersbaby

billieboy wrote: »

Oh and it helps you lose weight after giving birth and gives you an excuse to eat more as you need the extra calories for baby:j .

I had heard that this was supposed to be one of the benefits billieboy - was it the case with you? - I found the opposite that I didn't start to lose the weight until I stopped feeding and was the same story with both pregnancies and with a lot of my friends so they say :mad:

oldMcDonald

I bottle fed all five of mine.

With each one I attempted to breast feed, but even with support from NCT etc, sadly it just didn't happen for me. The one plus for bottle feeding is that both parents can share feeding right from the moment the baby is born. Other than that I genuinely cannot think of one. I guess you could say that if Mum didn't feel comfortable breast feeding baby in public then that would be a pro-bottle reason, but it isn't one I agree with.

Breast milk is chemical-free, the right amount of everything that baby needs, no faffing about with washing / steaming bottles (unless you express, but even then it is nothing like the amount of bottles a bottle fed baby goes through), no 'new mum' panic when Tescos runs out of SMA and you worry what will happen if you use a different brand, cheaper than formula, what nature intended......I am sure I could go on and on.

I would say breast feeding was definately the best option, even as someone who bottle fed her own. (though not through choice )

Mips

It doesn't matter which is best or which isn't.

When the time comes your partner will decide, and she should be respected for her decision either way.

When my husband can sit up for an hour with his sore nipples providing milk to our babies, then I may just hear what his views on the subject are.

Until then....

galvanizersbaby

*Louise* wrote: »

OP - I breast fed 3 children, and I am going to be brutally honest here - I hated it. I done it for the babies, to try and do my best for them but never for one moment felt the lovely bonding feeling that some mums talk about. It was painful, uncomfortable and embarrassing. But that's my experience.


Sorry, if I sound a bit harsh, it's just I resented the midwives and health visitors who pestered me to 'keep going' when I was crying with pain every time the baby latched on, and it was obvious by their poor weight gain that I wasn't producing enough milk.


Lots of people will post how wonderful the experience was - I just want to let you know the other side. What's right for most might not be right for your partner, she will know when the time comes.

Oh dear Louise - sounds like your experience of breastfeeding was very similar to mine :eek: agree with you think it's very much a what's right for mum when the time comes - unfortunately you can't really plan ahead with that one

Ishtar

I breastfed DD for 12 months. It wasn't always easy, sometimes quite challenging, but it was always her choice as to when to stop.

Has your partner had a chat with her midwive about it? In my experience they are very pro-breast, which might be a bit off-putting if you're unsure. Local support groups (I'm sure there's a pun there!) can give advice - the midwife is sure to have details.

Pros: no bottles, etc, to have to wash up and sterilise. Always 'on tap' and at the right temperature. Breast milk adapts to your baby's needs as s/he grows. You get some quiet time with little one....no-one else can feed her so you get to be with her. For me there was a great sense of it being a continuation of the nurturing before birth.

There are some downsides, though, and maybe this is what's putting your partner off. I'm sure you're finding that people delight in telling you their baby-related horror stories - I know I heard loads, and yes, there were one or two sneers from people I knew when I said I wanted to breastfeed. All quite off putting!

Take care
D.

lincsdan86

Dippychick wrote: »

It doesn't matter which is best or which isn't.

When the time comes your partner will decide, and she should be respected for her decision either way.

When my husband can sit up for an hour with his sore nipples providing milk to our babies, then I may just hear what his views on the subject are.

Until then....

Talk about opening up a can of worms with this.

As I have said before I just want my OH to know both sides of the story and if she still doesnt want to do it then that is fine. But sometimes it is good be the whole story, good things and bad things before a choice is made.

Dont you think that comment about your husband is a little harsh, Im sure there are my men out there that would be more then happy to help with breastfeeding just nature didnt see it that way. That doesnt mean that their feelings on the matter should be disregarded completely!

*Louise*

lincsdan86 wrote: »

Im sorry if it came across like that, i didnt mean it to, I just want my oh to know both sides of the story before she makes her mind up. Of course i wouldnt force her into doing something that was hurting her.

Baby is due 21st December, Bit of time to wait but we are both excited about it. so please no comments about it being too early to start thinking about this.

Thank you

Awww, okay - I'm assuming now that you're just trying to be really prepared. Never too early to start planning

I just got the impression you were really 'pro breast' lol and were trying to talk your partner round. No one knows whats best until the baby arrives.

Best of luck to you both.

galvanizersbaby

lincsdan86 wrote: »

Talk about opening up a can of worms with this.

As I have said before I just want my OH to know both sides of the story and if she still doesnt want to do it then that is fine. But sometimes it is good be the whole story, good things and bad things before a choice is made.

Lincsdan - I think it's great that your trying to get all the info you can on breastfeeding but in my op the trouble is your OH can't really make an actual decision on it before the baby is born and she tries it herself - best she can do is make the decision to give it a try.

Trouble is it's not as easy as some would have you believe and yes it's undoubtably best for baby if you are producing enough milk but it can be not so good for mum for a variety of reasons.
I know I was made to feel quite guilty about not continuing with feeding and a bit of a failure - I know there are others that feel the same
I will be shot down in flames here but I think this is really a mummy decision/subject not a daddy one and in that respect I do think that the fathers feelings on the matter should be disregarded - soz lincsdan I know you are well meaning x

Mips

lincsdan86 wrote: »

Talk about opening up a can of worms with this.

As I have said before I just want my OH to know both sides of the story and if she still doesnt want to do it then that is fine. But sometimes it is good be the whole story, good things and bad things before a choice is made.

Dont you think that comment about your husband is a little harsh, Im sure there are my men out there that would be more then happy to help with breastfeeding just nature didnt see it that way. That doesnt mean that their feelings on the matter should be disregarded completely!

My husband told me he would do the nightfeeds if I expressed - my baby couldn't latch on again after she got teat confusion. That upset me.

I had got over the hardest parts of breast feeding and was doing it great - I was just losing all my weight rapidly and couldn't eat

I was not being harsh on you.. but ultimately, you have to realise that you forcing the BF issue on your girlfriend, who may struggle from the onset for any number of reasons.. will NOT be welcomed by a very hormonal mum with new baby!

Mips

lincsdan86 wrote: »

Im sorry if it came across like that, i didnt mean it to, I just want my oh to know both sides of the story before she makes her mind up. Of course i wouldnt force her into doing something that was hurting her.

Baby is due 21st December, Bit of time to wait but we are both excited about it. so please no comments about it being too early to start thinking about this.

Thank you

Oh don't worry there Dan.. she will have the BF hounds onto her as soon as baby is born