In a daze

jenjade

well as for parting with things i went round the house with a box for car boot e bay and i try not to think about what is costs if you are not using think about how good it would be to replace it with cash. i am now completly addicted and it has reduced my buying as i think do i NEED this???
think of it as your house is full of cash sat there while to are stuggling to pay back debts!!
join a challenge on her make £10 a day or e bay challange great for motervations and ideas!

kimlisa66

Hi StuntmanBob

Just to chuck my two pennies worth in as well to the excellent advice and guidance given by the others. It may seem hopeless, but to us outsiders who have all been there, done it, worn the t-shirt, its not impossible

You have a considerable income coming in, its what you are spending it on that's causing you the problems. You recognise you need to radically overhaul your lifestyle and it might be worth taking a deeper look as to why you are spending so much on socialising, drinking and smoking etc.

Please please do not take this as a criticisim, it isn't, but I was in your position last year, spending ridiculous amounts of money because bascially I was in an unhappy marriage. We spent on meals out, luxuries etc just to paper over the cracks. I am not saying you are unhappy in your present relationship, far from it, but once you have identified where you are going wrong and why, then you can do something about it.

StuntmanBob wrote: »

It's a mess. There's still lots of stuff on here which I know I have to change, like quitting smoking, stopping going to the pub.

[FONT=&quot]Statement of Affairs and Personal Balance Sheet[/FONT][FONT=&quot]

Monthly Income Details
Monthly income after tax................ 4500
Partners monthly income after tax....... 0
Benefits................................ 0
Other income............................ 0
Total monthly income.................... 4500

Monthly Expense Details
Mortgage................................ 0
Secured loan repayments................. 0
Rent.................................... 750
Management charge (leasehold property).. 0
Council tax............................. 90
Electricity............................. 53
Gas..................................... 41

[/FONT][FONT=&quot]No reason why your landlord can stop you switching suppliers[/FONT][FONT=&quot]
Oil..................................... 0
Water rates............................. 30
Telephone (land line)................... 40
Mobile phone............................ 20
TV Licence.............................. 12
Satellite/Cable TV...................... 25
Internet Services....................... 30

[/FONT][FONT=&quot]I would look at combining the landline, homephone, internet and satellite tv...I know you said you need a professional service etc, but there are some good deals out there, you just need to find them[/FONT][FONT=&quot]
Groceries etc. ......................... 290

[/FONT][FONT=&quot]You can definitley save here, set yourself a weekly budget of say £50 a week, shop at Lidl, Aldi, go online to see which supermarkets have special offers etc[/FONT][FONT=&quot]

Clothing................................ 0
Petrol/diesel........................... 187

[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Why so high if you work from home ? I drive to work and back every day and ferry my daughter to various afterschool stuff and im spending about £15 to 20 a week[/FONT][FONT=&quot]

Road tax................................ 15
Car Insurance........................... 52
Car maintenance (including MOT)......... 72

[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Ive a suggestion, look at leasing a brand new car, Im about to lease a brand new Mini Coooper. My parents took possession of a brand new citroen today, £90 per month leased, includes road tax and full warranty, their petrol bill on their old Rover was double the monthly cost of this lovely little brand new car[/FONT][FONT=&quot].

[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Car parking............................. 0
Other travel............................ 0
Childcare/nursery....................... 0
Other child related expenses............ 100
Medical (prescriptions, dentist etc).... 67
Pet insurance/vet bills................. 0
Buildings insurance..................... 0
Contents insurance...................... 20

[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Contents insurance too high, you can definitely save
[/FONT][FONT=&quot]
[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Life assurance ......................... 48
Other insurance......................... 0
Presents (birthday, christmas etc)...... 70
Haircuts................................ 3
Entertainment........................... 350
[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Holiday[/FONT][FONT=&quot]................................. 60
[/FONT][FONT=&quot]You already know this has got to be reduced dramatically, now and again is good for you but all the time is crippling you, works out at nearly £90 per week just for your entertainment bill. Presents fund is too high, works out at £840 per year, kids don't need that much spent on them, they just need your love which they already have.
[/FONT][FONT=&quot]
Emergency fund.......................... 0
(Unnamed monthly expense)............... 0
(Unnamed monthly expense)............... 0
Cash Spending........................... 450

[/FONT][FONT=&quot]See above - you could lease a brand new top of the range Mercedes for this dosh if you wanted too, but better spent on paying HMRC ![/FONT][FONT=&quot]![/FONT][FONT=&quot]
Wine and Beer........................... 175
[/FONT][FONT=&quot]
On top of Entertainment ??? Thats £525 per month on drinking and eating, that's a massive amount of money.

[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Maintenance and Child Support Payments.. 705
Total monthly expenses.................. 3755

Assets
Cash.................................... 0
House value (Gross)..................... 0
Shares and bonds........................ 0
Car(s).................................. 500
Other assets............................ 0
Total Assets............................ 500

No Secured Debt

Unsecured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Loan: Barclaycard..............11043.....298.......0
Loan: Coop.....................14081.....300.......0
Loan: Direct Line..............15044.....320.......0
Overdraft......................12000.....0.........0
Card: Natwest..................8538......196.......0
Card: Lloyds...................1.........0.........0
Card: John Lewis...............4901......253.......0
Card: Coop.....................11185.....226.......0
Card: Beneficial...............6958......173.......0
Card: Barclaycard..............16312.....374.......0
Loan: Natwest..................14510.....230.......0
Loan: Egg......................10913.....330.......0
Total unsecured debts..........125486....2700......-

Monthly Budget Summary
Total monthly income.................... 4,500
Expenses (including secured debts)....... 3,755
Available for debt repayments........... 745
Monthly UNsecured debt repayments....... 2,700
Surplus(deficit if negative)............ -1,955

Personal Balance Sheet Summary
Total assets (things you own)........... 500
Total Secured debt...................... -0
Total Unsecured debt.................... -125,486
Net Assets.............................. -124,986

Created using the SOA calculator at www.makesenseofcards.com.
Reproduced on Moneysavingexpert with permission.[/FONT]

Also I have to pay HMRC £5000 by the end of the month.
I posted on another thread, it's BR time for me.
Which I've been expecting for months but haven't been able to face.
Now the doodah is hitting the fan. I feel like putting everything into storage and running away. But I have a job to hold down and two kids whom I love so much, so I can't do that.

Sorry I'm just wallowing in self pity today. I stayed up all night and the tiredness has messed me up.

You can sort it there is plenty of scope to do so, the kids need you to stay focussed and strong, and everyone will support you on your journey.

Big hug to you

Kim :T:T:T

StuntmanBob

jenjade wrote: »

well as for parting with things i went round the house with a box for car boot e bay and i try not to think about what is costs if you are not using think about how good it would be to replace it with cash. i am now completly addicted and it has reduced my buying as i think do i NEED this???
think of it as your house is full of cash sat there while to are stuggling to pay back debts!!
join a challenge on her make £10 a day or e bay challange great for motervations and ideas!

Yes, I do need to re-program my thinking. When I moved into rented accom after my divorce, I bought a beautiful (and expensive) picture which I swore I'd never part with. I love that picture. It's symbolic of my new start. But today I went back to the gallery where I bought it from and asked if they could sell it for me. I could weep at the thought, but it's probably better to stay in the house without the picture than live in a cardboard box with it.

I've found all the old crates of lego and scalextric (loads of it) and I hoping to at least get a few pounds back. And I've listed 12 boxsets of DVDs on Amazon. There's some bargains to be had!

Anyway I'm feeling much better now than I was earlier. I'd forgotton just how quickly the darkness descends and how thoroughly it envelops you. Living alone can be very daunting at times and often depressingly lonely.

And I've just smoked my last ciggie :rolleyes:

What a day. Thank you everyone who replied to my post. It's made a huge difference and I feel resolved not to sink but to plough on regardless.

Thanks all for listening to my waffle.

GeorgeUK

That's another good thing about this board Bob - most of us have stared into that same chasm and thought the darkness would just swallow us up. We can give support as well as advice.

Now the old hands here still look into that chasm, but spit and listen for it hitting the bottom... while giggling, imagining which creditor it's going to land on.

There's always a solution - even though it's not always the one you hope for. It took years to get into debt and could take years to get out. Even when you feel you've had enough, there's always something else that you might be able to do that can snap you out of it.

You say you haven't had any late payments to bank or credit cards - that probably rules out reclaiming charges, but you should also look to see if you were missold any endomwnet policies or PPI.
http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/reclaim/

It won't make pretty reading right now, but you can see how long it may take to repay your debts by using the snowball calculator. The debt free date (DFD) spurs alot of people on and gives them motivation to better the target date.
http://www.whatsthecost.com/snowball.aspx

Let us know about that tax thing and i'll try to think of any other ways we can reduce the monthly payments at least in the short-term.

RAS

Smallthing, but do you have an immersion heater? if so find the thermostat, usually towards the bottom of the cylinder. There should be a large screw that adjusts the temperature. make sure it is set no higher than 60 degrees and you can save a few pounds.

Also if you do not already have them, buy a couple of energy saving light bulbs and put them in the rooms that you use the most. They will repay the cost in about 2 months and save you money over the winter.

Red_Fraggle_3

Does your girlfriend know your position ?
How old are your kids? when DD was 8 I explained the position I was in not being able to spend like her friends, they do understand it and 6 years on she even has her own budget which she uses for clothes etc. She see's now how wasteful some of her friends and has a clear out evry few months for ebay/charity.
Also from experience with my DD and her dad - its the quality of time not the stuff they remember :-)
good luck - wish i had known about ebay when i sold all my old stuff at a car boot only to then find it would have sold for more on ebay - lol you live and learn x

StuntmanBob

GeorgeUK wrote: »

I take it you need to find out the APR's and Lloyds isn't really only £1
It's usually advised to pay off the highest interest rate first and pay the minimum on everything else. There are a few exception if you can get incentives to keep your account open though. Sometimes after you clear a cards balance you will be offerred a 0% BT for x months or a low life of balance deal. These will help you to clear your cards quicker if you are not needing to pay large amounts of interest.

Have you looked at your credit report? You can view it free at experian (if you cancel within 30 days). I would look to see how many credit checks you have had recently. You can usually have 3 within a 6 month period before your credit score is affected.

If you have not recently applied for credit you may be able to get a 0% card from virgin money or MBNA. I suggest these because they have 0% interest for 14/15 months and the minimum payment is 3% in 1st month and £25 minimum thereafter. With these cards you can do a "super balance transfer" and BT the money from the card to your current account. This may be used for things such as paying overdrafts, loans or TAX. If this is a one off tax collection then this may be an option.

Not too sure, but could you request a payment holiday for some of the loans? Getting some of the cards on to 0% will help but you may not be able to tackle everything at once. You need a little more breathing space and this is the only thing i can think of without going on a DMP.

Some great advice here! Thanks.

Lloyds really is only £1 (in fact I paid it off two days ago). All other balances are low APR (they are all BT). Some 0% some 6.9% for life. Loans also are around 7%. I like the idea of a payment holiday.

Last time I looked, my credit ref was very good. But I'll never deal with MBNA/Virgin as I've heard they are real bad-asses if you get into arrears with them. No thanks.

StuntmanBob

Red_Fraggle wrote: »

Does your girlfriend know your position ?

Yep she knows. Luckily we don't share any finances whatsoever. In fact she jokes about never sharing a bank account with me! She always pays her half of everything (meals out, cinema tickets). We don't live together. It's pretty cool to be with someone who isn't put off by the financial situation.

My kids are 14 and 16. I spoke to them last week about the fact that things had gotton pretty serious now on the money front. They'll miss the treats but they'll cope.

P.S. eBay is a giant hassle. I'm going to find a local car boot if poss.

RAS

StuntmanBob wrote: »

Yep she knows. Luckily we don't share any finances whatsoever. In fact she jokes about never sharing a bank account with me! She always pays her half of everything (meals out, cinema tickets). We don't live together. It's pretty cool to be with someone who isn't put off by the financial situation.

Well done to you both, as there are loads of folks who do not talk about it at all. Have you considered ferreting round the freebies board for vouchers and pressies, to get treats? Also maybe a lazy bunch/lunch at home or a barbie sometimees, if it ever gets to be summer.

StuntmanBob wrote: »

My kids are 14 and 16. I spoke to them last week about the fact that things had gotton pretty serious now on the money front. They'll miss the treats but they'll cope.

Glad you ave done that. They will learn a lot more about the value of money if they have a practical example of coping with the problems. The most important thing is your love and support not stuff.

StuntmanBob

GeorgeUK wrote: »

you should also look to see if you were missold any endomwnet policies or PPI.
http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/reclaim/

Let us know about that tax thing and i'll try to think of any other ways we can reduce the monthly payments at least in the short-term.

PPI - no, I never buy it.
Endowments - almost certainly mis-sold but I binned all the paperwork 5 years ago when the house was sold and I cashed them in. Oh well.

Tax - I'm waiting for a very tardy customer to pay me some money. If they do I may be able to postpone the wrath of HMRC by the skin of my teeth, until the next big tax bill is due in January (then I'll defo have to go BR).

Edit: I could always get a cash advance on my Lloyds ccard to pay the taxman off with !! But I can't think about that right now.