In laws, grrr!

Kaz2904

All the kids are back at school after Christmas so we'd have to do it in one of the school holidays. Not a problem for anyone as SiL doesn't work, BiL can take leave whenever he wants and DH and I would just book the time well in advance.

*Louise*

Kaz2904 wrote: »

Would I be being unreasonable if I said there was absolutely no beeping way that he was taking the kids away for 2 weeks to Cuba over Christmas without me? That's my initial reaction. Christmas is about family and being together and we get some time together even with me working. We go to church on Christmas eve and visit my side of the family locally. My DS's birthday is on 19th December too.
....

WHAT????:eek:

They are all planning on naffing off abroad without you at the most family-orientated time in the year, leaving you to spend Christmas working, not seeing your kids and even missing out on New Year and your son's birthday??

My OH wouldn't even ask - he knows it would be a cold day in hell before I would give in to a request like that And I would be bloody miffed that I wasn't important enough for them to consider.

I don't think you are being unreasonable in the slightest. YOUR immediate family come before whatever your MIL wants to plan. They should be considering you and trying to plan this big trip at a time when you CAN get away from work.

They are the unreasonable (and selfish) ones imo.

Penny_Watcher

Kaz2904 wrote: »

Kids are 6 and 4, will be 7 and 5 by then.

What happens to the 'magic of Christmas' for them if they are separated from Mum, bundled onto a plane for a 10 hour flight to a hot, alien place (to them).

We once suggested to our kids at a similar age that we go into a hotel a Christmas. I would have been lovely - for me. No cooking, cleaning or any of the usual chores.

DD2 burst into tears and asked how Santa would find her if she wasn't at home? I didn't want to go that much that it would upset my kids so we stayed at home.

Christmas is for children. Grown ups can go on holiday any time of year.

If I was you I work on getting your OH on side before your MiL has chance to ask him.

SarahNeedle1872

I don't think you are being unreasonable at all!
If it were another time of year and you still couldn't get the time off work, that would be a different story, and then I wuold probably be glad of it!

But at Christmas, and one of your childrens birthdays, I think it would be unreasonable of MiL/DH to even ask! Stick to your guns, and let us know the outcome

Sarah x

whitewing

I totally agree that if you can't get time off, then neither you, your OH or your children should go. I also agree that if they know/knew that it is impossible for you to get time off then they shouldn't have even asked.(Or maybe asking is okay but a no is a no without any form of pressure).Having said that, if you are on your lonesome and seething, I expect I'll be on MSE at some point, lol!

Craftyscholar

Kaz2904 wrote: »

It wasn't until later in the evening when BiL said he had no bother getting 2 weeks off over Christmas that I realised MiL wanted everyone to go.
SiL sais that she'd been on about it for ages, taking everyone away together.
She seems really excited about it and is planning how fab this trip would be to get away from England at Christmas time.

Or am I over reacting?

Discuss........

Apparently she had been 'on about it' to everyone except you and your OH.
When was she planning on telling you?
No, you are not over reacting.

floss2

Perhaps she has been wanting to take BiL & SiL, but hadn't asked you because of your job & work committments....after all, it is SiL who has told you MiL wants to take "everyone away together". Maybe MiL was thinking about taking you & your DH & kids away another time, but not at Christmas, and that is why she hasn't spoken to you about it?

miserly_mum

I was wondering how your hubby and the inlaws would get round the practical side of Xmas for the kids?

They are still young enough to believe in Santa so are they planning to take all their pressies with them pre wrapped. (not very practical I would have thought)

Or are the kids expected to wait till after Xmas to get their pressies simply because their Granny doesn't like Xmas?

whatatwit

I don't think his family have fully realised the implications of your job.
They no doubt think that you will be able to get time off especially as it's for a holiday.
I think the kids are too young to go just with dad, not because of the practicalities, but because you'll really miss them.
Maybe when they are grumpy teenagers that struggle to surface before 3pm over the Christmas break, whilst you are working all hours and arrive home to find the house a tip, then you might be glad to be rid of them and have a bit of peace.

Bennifred

Are you sure you, your OH and children are included in your MIL's plans?? I'm just thinking - wouldn't it have been mentioned to you by now if you see them every week? Maybe you're not invited......:eek: