How Cheap can a Funeral Be !

Reverbe · 22 July 2009 at 1:16PM

Related to this I have seen an ad for a tv show that has me quite concerned. When I die I do not have a partner and children but havent bothered with a will as it is costly and I have no beneficiaries. This show said they track down ppl who may be related to you and I am concerned as I do NOT want any of my dads family getting their grubby hands on anything that used to be mine. Is this tv ad claim true?

Molly41 · 22 July 2009 at 3:03PM

hi,
Yes it is true. Have you watched Heir Hunters on BBC1 at 9.15? This is a daily programme that follows these heir hunters. They track down the nearest blood relatives. Have you thought about charity? You need to make a will to stop any money being distributed to your blood relatives. If no relatives it goes to the government so charity might be a option? So much choice too...Im leaving mine to Westie Rescue!!!

Molly

ubamother · 22 July 2009 at 3:05PM

unless your assets and money are very complicated making a will isn't costly. A friend who died recently wrote his own will stating where the money would go, and named an executor. Two friends signed it - I was one so I know. The executor only needed this will and death certificate to sort out the money and belongings, including a pension payment. Family can make a claim when there is no will, but I don't know the ins and outs. I would strongly suggest if you have a favourite charity or good cause you will your pennies to them - pretty sure some of them have will forms you can use.

Phoolgrrrl · 22 July 2009 at 5:01PM

making a will isn't difficult. Just make sure it is witnessed properly by 2 independant people ie not a benificiary or a spouse of a benificiary. Best practice is to have them both watch you sign and watch each other sign. By watch I mean be in the same room. You can have 1 witness at a time but better to have both together, they can then vouch for each other and your signature.

mary-op · 22 July 2009 at 5:49PM

For making a will try the Cancer Research site........they sent me a form which I took to the solicitors and it covered the cost. They do like a donation but that comes from the estate and can be however large or small you want it to be.....or none at all. We specified a donation anyway.
lollyhith - so sorry to hear about your Dad x
My Mum died in February, she'd made a will and paid for her funeral in advance (£2,500) so it was all arranged and we didn't have to think about hymns and such like. She'd chosen them. But there were still newspaper announcements to pay for and as she'd been in a care home and both me and my brother live away the undertakers did the catering............not very good for what we paid. Flowers for funerals always seem to be a lot more expensive than if you bought a bunch from the florists and got them to tie a pretty ribbon round it.

OH and myself have opted for a green burial in the simplest way possible but we're still going to need undertakers as far as I can gather. But it will be what we want and a lot cheaper (I hope)

kayjay1809 · 22 July 2009 at 6:19PM

I lost my mum last year and we chose the cheapest 'wood' coffin, firstly as we preferred it and secondly my dad was paying for everything so we were trying to keep costs down. I have to say the cardboard coffins were awful.. they were rectangle and looked just like a cardboard box AND they cost as much as the 'wood' coffin. I liked the wicker coffin for me, but tbh I'm not religious and I don't care what happens to me when I'm gone. I keep thinking we must research non religous funerals but hopefully it won't happen for a (long) while as we're only in our 40s!!!

ceridwen · 22 July 2009 at 6:53PM

I've not read all the way through this thread - so forgive me if the answer is contained in it.

I have been concerned for some time as to how the costs for my parents' funerals are going to be covered come the time - as it will be me arranging it all. I know theres enough money tied up in their house to cover it all no problem and that they have made a will.

As far as I am concerned - I'll just do whatever they have left me instructions to do - and, if they havent, then I'll do whatever I think they would have said if they had IYSWIM. If I think theres money wasted - oh well....thats up to them...they will be paying for it after all (from their house).

What DOES concern me, however, is wondering whether the bills might require to be paid before the house money is actually available. I'm anticipating it will take months to sell the house and have the money available - and I simply dont earn enough to be able to lend out ANY of my own money to pay bills and then wait for it to come back to me again when the house is eventually sold. There would also be rows about it too - as I would obviously ask my brother to "lend out" half the money required - rather than do it all myself anyway (if I HAD the money for my half share of the loan) and he would refuse.

So - all round - short of me winning the Lottery - it is actually simply not possible to pay literally a penny of the costs until the house money is there in the bank. I've reminded my parents how low-paid I am and that I simply couldnt "make a loan of my money" in that way and asked them to take out some sort of prepaid plan - and they refused.

So - what would I actually do in those circumstances? Would I have to tell the local hospital to keep the bodies "in deep freeze" for however long it took till the house was sold - and only then be able to have the funerals or what? Obviously - I wouldnt want to take that option anyway - as I would want them to be at the time they were due - ie within days. I'm going to be pretty upset when my father dies anyway - without that bit of "unfinished business" hanging over my head - but I simply cannot think what else I COULD do. I would certainly wish to be able to sit down one month from the time and think "Right - I've held the funeral and wake/paid all bills/cleared their house and the only thing that might still be needing to be dealt with is the house hasnt yet sold and the Will not yet implemented". So - I'd know all the practicalities had pretty much been dealt with - I was just waiting on an estate agent to finalise the sale of the house and I only had to concern myself with the emotional side of things IYSWIM.

I cant be the first or last in this situation - ie knowing the money to cover it all IS there, but cant be released for goodness knows how long. What do other people do in those circumstances? I would be unwilling to even try expecting a funeral director to wait that long for his bill to be paid - I would want that dealt with promptly. Anyway - there would be the cost of the "wake" - food, etc, for that would have to be bought - and Tesco certainly wouldnt wait for the cost of that to be paid later...

With the age my parents are - this situation is looming closer and closer and concerning me.

As my mother has got everything else planned - has had for years - I am somewhat upset now at the thought that she has given no apparent thought as to just how the money to deal with that is to be there available as soon as it is required - despite my requests to let me know how that will be dealt with.

buxtonrabbitgreen · 22 July 2009 at 7:03PM

I was fortunate that my mum had a life insurance policy and the benificiary was my brother. The insurance company paid out really quickly so the funeral was paid for out of that. We then repaid my brother out of the priceeds of the house when it was sold.
I did have to put the cost of the food and drink in th epub afterwards on my credit card. Fortunatley I had enough of a limit to make it possible.
So, would your parents condider getting a life insurance, at least for the cost of the funeral

ceridwen · 22 July 2009 at 7:11PM

Thanks for that.

As far as I am aware my parents have no life insurance policy - and I dont think they would take one out anyway - in fact I'm sure they wouldnt..

I see your point re paying on your credit card - errr...but I cant see the house being sold quickly enough to be able to pay the very next monthly credit card statement in full as normal - so I'd be left with a debt that was nothing to do with me hanging round my head. Obviously - I could reckon up how much the interest was and deduct that from the house money when it eventually sold - but it would worry me having an apparent debt attached to my name for months at a time and no guarantee that it wouldnt be me stuck with it in the end (who knows what state the housing market will be in come the time?:eek:). That scenario would also lead to rows with my brother as well - as I would point out that half the credit card debt was to be in his name - and he would refuse that as well. As you can tell - my brother and I get on really well - not....

I worry a LOT about having debt that is MINE anywhere near me - I mean one heck of a LOT! - at the best of times. This wouldnt be the best of times obviously - and I know I simply couldnt handle having an apparent debt on top of everything else. My job is, in a variety of ways, very insecure and it worries me how I will manage financially as it is if/WHEN that goes "belly up" - so I just dont have the financial security to cope with that anyway.

ceridwen · 22 July 2009 at 7:37PM

I think one of my fears about this whole thing is that everything will explode around my head - as my mother manages all the finances of her and my father. I know my father cares about me and I think would be concerned to ensure that I dont worry how this is to be dealt with. My mother - I have little idea what she thinks of me/feels for me after all these years - but I DO know that she has a basic belief that seems to run "hardship is character-forming - I've had plenty - so I dont think in terms of dealing with this so my daughter knows what is happening as a way of showing I care - she can work it out for herself." Hence my fears that she will leave me running round in circles come the time wondering how to deal with this and not think to prevent that unnecessary worry for me. She simply wouldnt see leaving it all in a mess the same way I would/will if it turns out that I have no idea how its all to be paid for at the time - as I suspect will be the case.

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How Cheap can a Funeral Be !

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