I've mucked up. Really badly.

[Deleted User] · 13 February 2018 at 11:18AM

ohbumstoitall wrote: »

It's the "safe for work" version of how I actually feel!

Thanks, I've got a long road ahead with this bloody 10k. Ugh. Maybe...just maybe this will finally teach me a lesson

It's going to be tough but I think you realise that.

There are a lot of very helpful friendly people here, that will offer advise and support (as you've seen), as you go on.

Keep posting and may be start a diary? xx

lambda · 13 February 2018 at 11:52AM

Hi There

Well done for coming to terms with this and for starting on the right path. You have done a very grown up thing and the most important thing is that you know that you have to sort this out.

I think first things first in that you absolutely *must* have a household budget. Part of the problem with your spending is that you didn't appreciate the value of your income against your expenses. Without a budget, it's impossible to know where your money is going. There are a lot of free apps now that will help you with this. I think it is the first crucial step. You need to learn to control your spending habits now before you tackle your debt, otherwise you will never get out of it.

Unsecured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly.. .APR
HSBC...........................6004.55...150...... .0
Family Loan....................6740......130.......0
OH DMP with Payplan............10303.1...105.......0
Barclaycard 2 .................1378.57...35........0
Tesco Credit Card..............190.93....25........0
TSB............................1412.62...25....... .0
American Express...............4083......50........21
Halifax Card...................2617.94...28........0
BarclayCard 1..................2335.51...54........0
Total unsecured debts..........35066.22..602.......-

I see your OH is on a DMP. I think that credit just doesn't work for you guys at all. I really think you should go an immediately cut up all of your credit cards, and cancel them as soon as your refunds have cleared on them.

But tackling the debt itself is a bit tricky as you don't have a huge amount left to play with at the end of the month. The family loan, can that not be deferred for now until after the loans are cleared? That would give you another £130 a month to play with.

How long have the loans got left to be paid?

I think if you first tackle that little Tesco Card, to be honest I would aim to just clear that in a month, then cancel it. That'll clear £25 a month more. And then the BarclayCard2 and so on, until they are all clear. Just pay minimum payments on all the cards and blast the ones with the smallest balances first until they are paid and then cancel them.

And then after this, I think you don't ever want to have credit again. No credit cards, no car hire schemes, just live within your means and pay for things in cash. Life is less stressful that way.

And remember, if you have any questions at all, don't hesitate to ask them on here. We are here to help and support you! You can do it!

LJB290 · 13 February 2018 at 1:20PM

I'm glad your're getting some counselling and help with one of your addictions but are they/you addressing the other one .... shopping to make yourself feel better?
Its clearly making you stressed and depressed.
MIND offer counselling and are very good (and inexpensive) so it may be worth addressing this particular issue too otherwise the behaviour may continue.
I hope you get the help and support you need - its horrible having to deal with things on your own.

a_silver_lining · 13 February 2018 at 1:27PM

Read everything and just want to say a BIG well done! I did the Marie Kondo way of tidying and it made a big difference. I kept the bags of items separately and then slowly put them on eBay. My items are low value consume jewellery and skin care but I!!!8217;ve made almost £200 back so far. I!!!8217;d suggest returning the items you!!!8217;ve found receipts for and also your high value items like mobile phones and have some small auctions for items you will get £5 mixed in with higher value actions. It can be hard to list loads of actions for little profit, so higher value mixed in there can help with the motivation.

I can see that selling could become an addition in itself but if you cut off access to credit it could be a great way to make back some money. I bought my packaging for posting from the pound shop and it worked out pretty cheap.

And don!!!8217;t forget to pay it straight of the card. Once my bill comes through from eBay and comes off my paypal I transfer the money straight over.

jubilee14 · 13 February 2018 at 4:28PM

Hi there lots of good advice regarding dealing with debt. Just wanted to say i had to get security clearance with my old job when i was on DMP and had no problem with it. I just had to declare i was on DMP and what arrangements were in place and that was it no further questions or queries. So if you can get on DMP then it shouldnt affect your job. Hope this gives some assurance at least on that point.

susanthunt · 13 February 2018 at 5:16PM

I note a few Amazon purchases? When were they? Check returns policy - pretty sure Amazon has a VERY long returns policy. You would need to pay return postage if over 14 days and you have simply decided you don't want something.
But larger items such as Nintendo MIGHT be returnable if you have kept the packaging safe?? Worth a try.
Sorry, in a rush but I really feel for you. You say you can't tell husband but if he finds out, that will be worse than coming clean.

ohbumstoitall · 13 February 2018 at 6:31PM

lambda wrote: »

Hi There

Well done for coming to terms with this and for starting on the right path. You have done a very grown up thing and the most important thing is that you know that you have to sort this out.

I think first things first in that you absolutely *must* have a household budget. Part of the problem with your spending is that you didn't appreciate the value of your income against your expenses. Without a budget, it's impossible to know where your money is going. There are a lot of free apps now that will help you with this. I think it is the first crucial step. You need to learn to control your spending habits now before you tackle your debt, otherwise you will never get out of it.

Unsecured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly.. .APR
HSBC...........................6004.55...150...... .0
Family Loan....................6740......130.......0
OH DMP with Payplan............10303.1...105.......0
Barclaycard 2 .................1378.57...35........0
Tesco Credit Card..............190.93....25........0
TSB............................1412.62...25....... .0
American Express...............4083......50........21
Halifax Card...................2617.94...28........0
BarclayCard 1..................2335.51...54........0
Total unsecured debts..........35066.22..602.......-

I see your OH is on a DMP. I think that credit just doesn't work for you guys at all. I really think you should go an immediately cut up all of your credit cards, and cancel them as soon as your refunds have cleared on them.

But tackling the debt itself is a bit tricky as you don't have a huge amount left to play with at the end of the month. The family loan, can that not be deferred for now until after the loans are cleared? That would give you another £130 a month to play with.

How long have the loans got left to be paid?

I think if you first tackle that little Tesco Card, to be honest I would aim to just clear that in a month, then cancel it. That'll clear £25 a month more. And then the BarclayCard2 and so on, until they are all clear. Just pay minimum payments on all the cards and blast the ones with the smallest balances first until they are paid and then cancel them.

And then after this, I think you don't ever want to have credit again. No credit cards, no car hire schemes, just live within your means and pay for things in cash. Life is less stressful that way.

And remember, if you have any questions at all, don't hesitate to ask them on here. We are here to help and support you! You can do it!

Unsecured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
HSBC...........................5252.98...135.......0
Family Loan....................5950......130.......0
OH DMP.........................9883.17...105.......0
First Direct Loan..............2577.77...112.......0
BarclayCard 2..................1210.3....35........0
Tesco Credit Card..............596.86....25........0
TSB 03/18......................1325.66...15........0
Amex...........................11000.....400.......0
Halifax Card 03/19.............2449.94...0.........0
BarclayCard 06/18..............2034.16...0.........0
Total unsecured debts..........42280.84..957.......-

So it has changed, sorry I kept meaning to get round to this. Some has gone down, then the AMEX has gone up and there's now a loan (OH didn't look after his car properly, it went boom so I took out a loan for a 2012 car, in hindsight I should have just got another banger)

I need to BT from the HSBC to the TSB card as the interest free period is running out. Then I can cut the TSB card up and chuck it. I don't have any pins for the credit cards, I shredded them.

And I think you're right, I just shouldn't have credit cards. There is one credit card that isn't on the list, I have an asda credit card which I use to get cashback. I remember when they sent it, I had a £3000 limit and I reduced it to £400 straight away which is my petrol and food budget. We both have a card and it gets paid off in full each month, the cashback pays for Christmas Dinner.

I will do a SOA at some point however I actually need to work out first what's going to happen over the next year. For example, husbands last student loan comes in April (£2500 or something) but that's already accounted for in YNAB (old ynab) and I'm moving to the new ynab but can't work it out. then once that loans gone he's either got to get a job or do a masters degree, so I just don't know what's happening

Toomuchdebt · 13 February 2018 at 7:08PM

If you put any of your Korean skincare on eBay do let me know as I love it, but don't often buy due to shipping charges.

a_silver_lining · 13 February 2018 at 8:49PM

Sorry I'm a little confused, does you DH make payments from his own budget for the car or does it come out of your joint budget? I'm just wondering who is paying for what debt or if your finances are joint?

lika_86 · 13 February 2018 at 11:29PM

ohbumstoitall wrote: »

I will do a SOA at some point however I actually need to work out first what's going to happen over the next year. For example, husbands last student loan comes in April (£2500 or something) but that's already accounted for in YNAB (old ynab) and I'm moving to the new ynab but can't work it out. then once that loans gone he's either got to get a job or do a masters degree, so I just don't know what's happening

He has to get a job. He might want to do a Masters but as a couple you can't afford for him to continue to be a student when you are in so much debt.

I've mucked up. Really badly.

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