The Garden Fence - proper Old Style support and chat!

Softstuff you sound like you are doing it like I did which largely depends on seasonal stuff. I will think up some cheaper ways of doing the meals.

You're doing marvelously it took me nearly a year to lose ten pounds on a high protein low carb diet. I need to do it again. DS's ability to eat a diet and then another 5000 calories on top does not help. I promised myself I would go on a diet when he moves out.

Been to the Christie again today. Not a bad journey it's always much quicker when there are very fewer students around. Nothing to report all is well for now and I have heard nothing about the flats I have applied for.

That's great Softstuff, are you finding that you have more energy?

Morning all,

I too had an interrupted night, but I did get back off and managed to sleep until almost 7. It rained very heavily last night and everything is quite soggy today, but the heavy fog has finally lifted.

Monna, I know exactly what you mean about seeing something that says it has been done up and then wishing they hadn't bothered. There are many I've seen in my house dreaming forays onto Rightmove. One is just a few down from where we rent and has been on the market for a long time now. The price has been reduced twice. It is a perfectly nice house and I can't help but think that the issue has more to do with most people not fancying a mirrored black kitchen (floor to ceiling) and a similar treatment in the bathroom. It probably cost a fair amount to do and I've no doubt the current owners are very pleased with it, but I'd have to start from scratch.

Last of the marking this morning, along with a few other tasks and then to the shops as we're having friends for lunch and a trip to the garden centre this morning. I'm back to feeling a bit anxious again today so hopefully this distraction will help.

Silver--I'm so relieved for you. I know there is still a lot to think over, but really that is the sort of thing they should have told you about to begin with!

Softstuff--Well done! It is ok to spend money on healthy food. I know not everyone has it, but as long as you can make it work then try not to worry about it.

Hugs to all who need them.x

Hester, that's tricky. I have been in both roles - the one taking stress home and the one getting it from DH. There is lots of advice about techniques for leaving stress at the door (or in your case the gangplank) on t'internet but it is not that easy, is it?

Eventually I persuaded DH to leave his job, as there was no way of getting a reduction in workload or sensible response from senior management. Again, not always possible to swap jobs, of course! We were in a position where we could live off less money and my job brought in a steady income while DH built up a his small business.

Could you both make a living from fettling boats, or offering gardening services to nearby houses (most households have all the kit they just don't have the enrgy or time to do the mowing, so no need to have equipment and storage for it!)

Best tips for those that have to stick at it?
Minimise other stress re things you CAN control - have stuff ready for work so not rushing round on the last minute. Ask for help so you can make enough time to do other things, rather than meeting yourself coming back. Don't over commit outside work, you need down time to indulge in pleasure (steady on, Girl, I meant hobbies, well other hobbies, as well as that :rotfl:).

Another helpful, if wacky, tip I was given is to mentally pack up the stress into a box, shut it, and place it outside. Sounds ridiculous but it does mean you have to conciously acknowledge the stress and consciously try not to take it home. Doesn't always work but helped sometimes.

CHS also needs to acknowledge that while it is very considerate to be worried about his friend/colleague, his worrying is only doing one thing - upsetting himself! I am afraid that nowadays I find myself saying 'there is nothing i can do about that so I am not going to devote any more energy or thought to it'! I spent years trying to find solutions to other people's problems but it is so draining.

If CHS is being told to do more than he is physically able to he should explain this to his employer. They have a duty of care to him and should not endanger his health in that way. Is there a Union rep he can speak to?
.
Just a thought but do you think that moving the boat frequently is adding to his worries? Is this necessary or could it be kept to a minimum for a few months?

Sorry to ramble. Hope it helps a bit! Mx

Hi all,

SO I cant believe they let you fret and worry prior to the meeting, still not a nice position to be in, but hope that now the financial concerns have gone you can relax x

Monna No one will refuse to buy a house because the owner hadn't dusted - unless you can write your name in in, it doesn't count - have that extra cuppa in bed and relax before you go off galavanting x

Hester When DH starts snapping at me (rare) when stressed I tell him in no uncertain words that the issue is NOT my fault, that I am happy to help, but as most issues cannot be helped, what's the point of stressing - like others have said, it's a leap of faith, but his handyman skills would be appreciated by many, so going self employed would be my advice too x Alternativey flash yer B oobs at him - it won't help the stress, but it'll bring a smile to his face and a twinkle to his eye :rotfl:

Softstuff I have been stirfying and cooking up a storm with my fancy sauces - I must be doing it wrong, I haven't lost an ounce

I was due to have my eye dialation yesterday, to find out whether the thingy was anything serious. turned up for my appointment, only to be told they were running over an hour behind, which would have meant I couldn't get a lift home, so had to rebook for next week - it can't be anything too serious or they wouldn't make me wait

I know I have missed people, but my brains overloaded now - hugs to those that need them and I promise to try harder x