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  • FIRST POST
    • MSE Sarah
    • By MSE Sarah 8th Oct 19, 4:01 PM
    • 208Posts
    • 88Thanks
    MSE Sarah
    0 WOW
    Money Moral Dilemma: Should we split our holiday refund?
    • #1
    • 8th Oct 19, 4:01 PM
    0 WOW
    Money Moral Dilemma: Should we split our holiday refund? 8th Oct 19 at 4:01 PM
    This week's MoneySaver who wants advice asks...

    I booked a holiday for myself and a friend, and we split the cost equally. The accommodation wasn't the best, and my friend felt he'd had such a bad experience with dirt, insects and mould that he wrote to complain, explicitly saying the complaint was just from him. The company responded to us both, as I booked the holiday, and refunded 20% of the cost to my credit card. My friend says he should get the full refund as it was his complaint - should we split it?

    Unfortunately the MSE team can't always answer money moral dilemma questions as contributions are often emailed in or suggested in person. They are intended to be enjoyed as a point of debate and discussed at face value.

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Page 1
    • TELLIT01
    • By TELLIT01 8th Oct 19, 4:23 PM
    • 7,058 Posts
    • 7,666 Thanks
    TELLIT01
    • #2
    • 8th Oct 19, 4:23 PM
    • #2
    • 8th Oct 19, 4:23 PM
    It can be argued either way. Both were staying in the same conditions so both nominally suffered in the same way. However, if one party didn't have an issue with the conditions and only one was prepared to complain there would seem little justification in the 'unaffected' party retaining any of the compensation.
    • FtbDreaming
    • By FtbDreaming 8th Oct 19, 4:29 PM
    • 59 Posts
    • 70 Thanks
    FtbDreaming
    • #3
    • 8th Oct 19, 4:29 PM
    • #3
    • 8th Oct 19, 4:29 PM
    If you're friend was decent they'd split the refund. If theu insist on keeping it all then give it to them and you keep the moral hogh ground that you're not a snake.
    • JGB1955
    • By JGB1955 8th Oct 19, 4:35 PM
    • 352 Posts
    • 396 Thanks
    JGB1955
    • #4
    • 8th Oct 19, 4:35 PM
    • #4
    • 8th Oct 19, 4:35 PM
    Surprised the company responded to YOU (given all that data protection stuff going on). Having said that, the money's in your account now, so, if you're a really good friend, you might just let him have half of it.. despite him not appearing to have a contract with the holiday company....
    • Pollycat
    • By Pollycat 8th Oct 19, 5:54 PM
    • 23,658 Posts
    • 63,804 Thanks
    Pollycat
    • #5
    • 8th Oct 19, 5:54 PM
    • #5
    • 8th Oct 19, 5:54 PM
    Really?
    He complained 'explictly from him'?
    Find a new friend.
    One with better morals.
    • Oxo1
    • By Oxo1 8th Oct 19, 9:05 PM
    • 13 Posts
    • 7 Thanks
    Oxo1
    • #6
    • 8th Oct 19, 9:05 PM
    No friend
    • #6
    • 8th Oct 19, 9:05 PM
    I would give all the money to him, and then get a new friend
    D
    • Nuadha
    • By Nuadha 8th Oct 19, 9:08 PM
    • 10 Posts
    • 9 Thanks
    Nuadha
    • #7
    • 8th Oct 19, 9:08 PM
    Yes!
    • #7
    • 8th Oct 19, 9:08 PM
    He should get it all the 20%. But only on the half he paid. If he is claiming he only complained on his behalf, then it's none of his business if they also gave you a bit of a refund too.

    I'd also rethink this particular friendship.
    • Ally3558
    • By Ally3558 8th Oct 19, 9:36 PM
    • 1 Posts
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    Ally3558
    • #8
    • 8th Oct 19, 9:36 PM
    • #8
    • 8th Oct 19, 9:36 PM
    I feel as your friend complained he should get the refund. I don't feel you could call yourself a friend in all honesty if you don't give him the refund as he did all the work. If you felt as bad as him you would've complained also. I wouldn't want someone i classed as a friend to do that to me and I would just walk away from that so called friend as obviously money means more than a friendship. I am talking from experience and it's not nice to have it done to you.
    • Pollycat
    • By Pollycat 8th Oct 19, 10:05 PM
    • 23,658 Posts
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    Pollycat
    • #9
    • 8th Oct 19, 10:05 PM
    • #9
    • 8th Oct 19, 10:05 PM
    I feel as your friend complained he should get the refund. I don't feel you could call yourself a friend in all honesty if you don't give him the refund as he did all the work. If you felt as bad as him you would've complained also. I wouldn't want someone i classed as a friend to do that to me and I would just walk away from that so called friend as obviously money means more than a friendship. I am talking from experience and it's not nice to have it done to you.
    Originally posted by Ally3558
    Would you want someone as a friend who explicitly complained on his own behalf about something both people experienced?
    Personally, I wouldn't just 'walk away' from that 'so called friend'.
    I'd run for the hills.
    Because to complain explicitly from him obviously means money means more to him than a friendship.
    And...the OP has the 20%.
    Love it!
    • Alexjacka
    • By Alexjacka 8th Oct 19, 10:12 PM
    • 1 Posts
    • 0 Thanks
    Alexjacka
    I think if youd have felt as bad about the accommodation you would have complained also. If you're not that type of person I think more fool you because the accommodation sounds terrible!! I think the moral thing to do would be for you to give all the refund to your friend (I'm sure 20% isnt actually that much) and let your friend decide what the moral dilemma is here as they spent the time and had the guts to complain. I'm sure if they hadn't been given the 20% refund youd be thinking what a fool for wasting their time writing the email??
    • REJP
    • By REJP 8th Oct 19, 10:19 PM
    • 117 Posts
    • 142 Thanks
    REJP
    Give your friend the money. You never know, he might split it with you.
    • mrpunk50
    • By mrpunk50 8th Oct 19, 10:37 PM
    • 8 Posts
    • 35 Thanks
    mrpunk50
    Give your friend 20% of the money he paid. Unless the holiday company has "explicitly stated" that they are giving him a 40% refund on his money, and nothing for you.

    Obviously we are only hearing one half of the story, but your friend sounds very selfish in this story.
    • kimplus8
    • By kimplus8 8th Oct 19, 10:44 PM
    • 849 Posts
    • 2,302 Thanks
    kimplus8
    The company has given you an overall refund of 20%, that is for both of you.
    Therefore he is entitled to 20% of his half of the money. The face they have given you some too is nothing to do with him.
    Regardless of who made the complaint you both stayed there, both paid and should both benefit from the compensation refunded to you.
    Mum to 8 troopersDave Ramsey and Martin Lewis are my Money Saving Heros.
    • Deedee9
    • By Deedee9 9th Oct 19, 6:04 AM
    • 26 Posts
    • 33 Thanks
    Deedee9
    The refund was 20% on the whole cost of the holiday - so give them their half - not all of it. The company has made the refund based on the fact that only one of you would deal with a complaint anyway - but two of you were on the holiday so you were both affected.

    The wording of the response is key.
    • warby68
    • By warby68 9th Oct 19, 6:25 AM
    • 1,363 Posts
    • 10,878 Thanks
    warby68
    The circumstances behind a so-called friend trying to claim purely for themselves is probably the key as its unusual. Did the friend want you to complain as the booker and payer and you didn't want to ? Did you argue? Were you being blamed for the rubbish accommodation? If that's the case then probably it is all due to the friend from the moral perspective. IF the friend was just trying to take advantage of your more relaxed attitude and get a 'double' refund for themselves, then that's not really a friend and they might be getting their comeuppance as you have control of the funds and the refund did cover both of you.

    It doesn't seem like a true 'friends' situation. Proper friends would probably split the money and the one who did the work would get some other favour or treat from the one who didn't.
    • Marko979
    • By Marko979 9th Oct 19, 7:12 AM
    • 1 Posts
    • 1 Thanks
    Marko979
    No you should not split it. Not a moral thing in my opinion.

    The compensation was 20% and not a fixed amount. Even though it was 1 complaint, they have refunded both of you. Or would they have refunded 40% if you both complained?

    Your friend loses nothing. And they shouldn’t be upset that you also gain.

    Although technically you should probably tell the company you don’t want your half and return it to them if you have no complaint yourself about the holiday.
    • gaving7095
    • By gaving7095 9th Oct 19, 7:14 AM
    • 165 Posts
    • 132 Thanks
    gaving7095
    You paid on your card, that in its self is a risk / hassle so in my mind you're certainly due a share of the refund.
    Mind you, just the fact that you were on the holiday & paid for your share would entitle you to some of the refund in my opinion anyway.
    Your friend sounds rather unreasonable to me. Writing an e-mail or letter of compliant is hardly a massive inconvenience.
    Thankfully I've never had a friend like that, so I can't be sure what I'd do, other than take this scenario (whatever the outcome) as a cue to distance myself from that person.
    If your "friend" doesn't see sense in sharing, then resolve the financial issue by doing whatever feels right to you, then ghost them. Life's too short to spend any of it arguing with supposed "friends" over money.
    Last edited by gaving7095; 09-10-2019 at 7:15 AM. Reason: Spelling mistake
    • Potbellypig
    • By Potbellypig 9th Oct 19, 10:25 AM
    • 538 Posts
    • 384 Thanks
    Potbellypig
    Right off the bat I thought I'd give them the 20% and find a new friend. You don't need people like that in your life. But my only question would be did you sleep in different rooms/apartments? If so, then was the friends room bad and yours was good. If so, then I can kind of see why they would expect the full 20%. For me, the correct answer is the refund should be split 50/50.
    • MDSDerby
    • By MDSDerby 9th Oct 19, 10:36 AM
    • 8 Posts
    • 0 Thanks
    MDSDerby
    Give him half and tell him to get lost. You don't need friends like that.
    • EtheAv8r
    • By EtheAv8r 9th Oct 19, 10:39 AM
    • 8 Posts
    • 9 Thanks
    EtheAv8r
    You both experienced the same holiday, and the same "poorness", and presumably paid 50-50, so it is fair and right and proper that the refund is shared 50-50 regardless of who made the complaint. To claim 100% because they made the complaint (for themselves and not on behalf of you both??? Unbelievable).

    Some friend - not. pay the 50% to them ans say farewell.
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