Redsquirrel's 'Striving For Better Days' Diary

redsquirrel80

pepe2008 wrote: »

I notice that you are not feeling:A Squizz.

That goes without saying...

redsquirrel80

Pepe! How was Sunday?!

Been busy busy stress stress here, more of the same as before.. but only 2 more days of work till hols, and I get paid on Friday :j

Relationship stuff still needs to be sorted, but I've made a decision, just have to think how to go about it... sad but it's for the best, and hopefully we will still be friends in the long run. I might have some other news on that front, which seems quite ridiculous in the current circumstances.. but could be very good..

Am entertaining some relatives that I rarely see tonight - for some reason they've decided to come and visit me as they are driving down from Scotland to other family further South. So will be a mad dash round supermarket on the way home, not sure if they're just expecting a quick cuppa or what, but I don't even have milk at home at the mo!

pepe2008

Sunday was a very nice day;) thanks Squizz. the best news is that I had got it wrong and she is not flying out until NEXT Tuesday:j :j .

Time for some more Goodbyes then.
On the other hand six months of chats over coffee, with a couple of days together, but nothing physical and now....shes leaving and realises how she feels!! This is going to take some thought, I know where I'd rather be.

edit; not so difficult escaping to North London occassionally, but Greece!

redsquirrel80

Aww Pepe, I'm glad it went well, hope that you can figure it out, and be very happy x

pepe2008

redsquirrel80 wrote: »

Aww Pepe, I'm glad it went well, hope that you can figure it out, and be very happy x

Its a prob Squizz. Although you can know yourself when something is over ther is still that inability to inflict pain on someone you've beenwith for years, although in doing so, you, yourself are experiencing the pain.
When suddenly being presented with 'the reason I've been looking for to finally do something ' the decision is hard to take. Its a bit like hiding the debts to prevent damage...when they were found out it was a massive relief.
Aaaarrrggghh.
No BIG decisions til after Xmas, and see how the Contact remains once she has settled in Greece...........probably meet some Greek God:cool:

edit, Sorry squizz, how ignorant of me...how are you?

Karmacat

Pepe, sorry to hear you're going through it, but also sounds like it could be fairly wonderful if it works out .... hope it goes the way you want it to.

Squizz, you're probably with your rellies now ... hope thats going okay.

boredofbeingathome

We shall have to call you tatty pepe now! Has a certain ring to it i think..

Hope you are coming out of the quagmire now young squizz and also hope rellies bought you some nice pressies.x

redsquirrel80

Thanks Bob & Karma Ugh.. well they didn't bring pressies but they did bring wine.. oh my head. It went ok although I did get a bit fed up with my aunty telling me about all the wonderful things my cousins had been doing - think cousins were a bit embarrassed as well.

OH turned up later on as he was out with workmates, so drank some more wine and had difficult conversation, he keeps asking me for a decision, but when I tell him I've had enough he tries to talk me round.. aargh.. it's so hard and I really don't want to have to do it just now.. why has it turned round from him telling me it's over to me being the one who has to decide?! Ah well, guess it will work itself out eventually. I really feel for you Pepe in your situation, but as you say you can see how it goes - am sure no Greek God will be as nice as you

Better do some work I suppose.. yawn!

Karmacat

Oh poor you! Thinking of your aunty telling you how wonderful the cousins in your face are, while they're all accepting your hospitality .... hmmmm!

Your OH sounds ... confusing. He tells you its over, then decides he wants you to decide, then won't accept your decision. He's giving you mixed messages for sure. But Squizz, I hate to say this, but.... you're calling him the OH, not the ex. I guess you feel a lot for him still, sweetie. These things take time to work out. Just be kind to yourself while you're doing it.

redsquirrel80

Hmm, you have a point Karma - he doesn't really feel like either OH or ex at the moment, somewhere inbetween. Yep I do still feel a lot, but not the same as I did - that was really obvious to me when I saw him last night. Supposed to be spending the day together on Saturday so we'll see what happens. I wish I was tougher!