Wot a life's thread.

blind-as-a-bat_2

wot_a_life wrote: »

I'm off to phone cccs, should I tell them it's joint debt or go it alone with just mine?

Give them the full picture, as Richard said wether your OH likes it or not your best doing this together so give them that info, you can always split it to compare as your going through it later, but for now you need to start by getting advice on the full situation

Richard_S

wot_a_life wrote: »

To be honest guys, my marriage is in turmoil, I've showed him this board on numerous occasions, then he takes out a credit card!

Can you believe it because I can't, this just adds to the pressure and worry, just to add, he's not using the card for anything constructive, it's for his own pleasurable use, not mine

(having a particually bad day - sorry)

Hi Wot a life,

There will come a point when your O.H won't be able to use the cards, and he'll have to acknowledge that something needs to be done. It's probably best if you don't put too much pressure on him, as that'll probably make him even more determined not to cooperate.

Meanwhile, can you open a basic account in your own name and start putting some money aside?

It seems quite rare when a couple get into financial trouble that the pain is shared equally. Inevitably, there seems to be one partner who does more, if not all, of the "spade work" while the other partner seems quite happy (or unhappy) to let them get on with it. That responsibility seems to have fallen squarely on your shoulders, and you're going to have to be the strong one, until such time as your O.H comes to his senses.

This website doesn't just have the information you need; it's also an incredibly powerful resource for emotional support, and you'll always find someone who's already gone through what you're facing.

Best regards

Richard

RAS

wot_a_life wrote: »

To be honest guys, my marriage is in turmoil, I've showed him this board on numerous occasions, then he takes out a credit card!

Can you believe it because I can't, this just adds to the pressure and worry, just to add, he's not using the card for anything constructive, it's for his own pleasurable use, not mine

Hi Wot a life

Glad you were able to say that up front.

The news was there in your first posts, in what was not said.

DFWers and BKers say sorry when they have deliberately offended, otherwise you will find that these forums are places to say a lot of things that are challenging. People will be here whatever the outcome of your financial or marital situations.

We get the odd !!!!!! (lovely word that the MSe spell checker has not picked up yet) who tries to wreck havoc but bear with us and they will be dispatched.

fermi

RAS wrote: »

We get the odd !!!!!! (lovely word that the MSe spell checker has not picked up yet) who tries to wreck havoc but bear with us and they will be dispatched.

*adds that to the Firefox dictionary*

RAS

You another Linux freak?

Think it is hypno's creation, but anyway in regular recent use on the troll thread on DFW.

wot_a_life

Well,

I have spoken to the cccs who have advised me to pay my OH's ccj's and make them a priority, they told me to continue with my mortgage, get 4 forms N245, fill them out and offer them £1 a month.

In the meantime, I am to offer my creditors £1 a month also, if they do not agree to my offers, then I am to wait for them to issue a ccj and follow the above process. (in the meantime sending them token payments)

I can't say I'm happy about the outcome as at the moment I have NO ccj's against me, they belong to OH and while he is merrily spending away on another cc, that will be more debt for me to sort out!!!

It's like banging my head against a brick wall, screaming and not being heared, It's bl00dy awful to say the least!

RAS

Wot a life

i can only assume that CCCS think this is a holding arrangment as per the help line whilst you wait for more detailed advice.

Have you spoken to NDL or the Insolvency help-line?

That would mean paying the mortgage plus £20 a month, then trying to survive on peanuts.

I amke that £163 per month after you pay the mortgage, the CT and the £1 per creditor. It will barely cover your utility bills.

CCCS_Matthew was on here earlier, can you send him a pm?

wot_a_life

No, I don't think it's a holding arrangement RAS, unless I missed something.

This is what they told me to do and they have downloaded a booklet onto my account so I could read through what they had told me.

It doesn't seem to help me much does it?

betterlatethannever

Hi WAL.
I'm afraid theres good and not so good in all these debt charities.
Mostly (thankfully) i've only ever heard good things about CCCS, but just occasionaly someone comes along and feels the advice wasn't what it should have been.

I totally agree with RAS, call National Debtline. It doesn't hurt to get a second opinion. (i used CAB/ND and CCCS- you can never have too much advice:rolleyes: )

I'll also Pm debt doctor, who works for CAB and posts on here. He's a total star and will give you some excellent advice. Hes very up on BR and CCJs etc.

I think its time to start looking after number one. Your getting advice and support but only you can do something with it all.
You've made huge steps already and you should be proud of that. How many people are happy to say up front to strangers that things aren't working out in their life. It takes some guts!

I'll Pm Debt Doc now, and just hope that he's around soon.

Best of luck xx

RAS

wot_a_life wrote: »

No, I don't think it's a holding arrangement RAS, unless I missed something.

This is what they told me to do and they have downloaded a booklet onto my account so I could read through what they had told me.

It doesn't seem to help me much does it?

Wot a life

Not a lot of help at all.

Was OH self employed?

This is one area where we certainly have seen some very variable responses from CCCS. I will rephrase that; one area where some CCCS staff on the help-line seem to be in need of training.