Marriage and living apart?

floss2

I would suggest your OH contacts the trustees of his pension fund & clarifies exactly whom he can name to benefit from his pension. That may solve all your immediate concerns and those details can be added to his will.

elisebutt65

Merlot wrote: »

If the DSS got wind of this marriage and you are not living with a husband who is well off, and claiming benefits, it will look like fraud to them, and you could well be living apart at HM pleasure. It's not worth it...Get legal advice and get a will.

I would tell them anyway - it's not like I would try to cover it up - like I said, I don't want to commit fraud!

We can wait another year anyway until I'm earning - it's not like there's an emergency situation right now - He's contacting his pension people to see if he can put me on as his SO whether we live together or not - I just want to be able to have some say in health matters as well though.

vik6525

elisebutt65 wrote: »

I would tell them anyway - it's not like I would try to cover it up - like I said, I don't want to commit fraud!

We can wait another year anyway until I'm earning - it's not like there's an emergency situation right now - He's contacting his pension people to see if he can put me on as his SO whether we live together or not - I just want to be able to have some say in health matters as well though.

I dont have any advice at all (being the dumb @ss that I am!)
But i just wanted to say I think you're being incredibly 'mature' (wow, how patronising am i!!) about all this, so good luck to ya!

Merlot

elisebutt65 wrote: »

I would tell them anyway - it's not like I would try to cover it up - like I said, I don't want to commit fraud!

We can wait another year anyway until I'm earning - it's not like there's an emergency situation right now - He's contacting his pension people to see if he can put me on as his SO whether we live together or not - I just want to be able to have some say in health matters as well though.

I don't think you are going to come to a satisfactory conclusion either way, if you don't tell them, your in trouble, If you tell them, then you are opening a can of worms, i.e the house, tax credits, any other benefits you receive will be stopped until an investigation has taken place...it really isn't worth it, just do the will until you start earning, and even then, the council house could become an issue.

Take legal advice.

I hope it works out for you whatever you decide to do.

Merlot.x.

elisebutt65

vik6525 wrote: »

I dont have any advice at all (being the dumb @ss that I am!)
But i just wanted to say I think you're being incredibly 'mature' (wow, how patronising am i!!) about all this, so good luck to ya!

Cheers vic!! Having 3 crappy marriages tends to mature you - RAFLMAO!!! Getting my priorities straight this time!!!! Hence waiting until kids are all growed up before we settle down together first as well.

lady_stardust

I don't know what sort of legal standing these have, but you might be able to cover some of the angles by getting a solicitor to draw up a partnership agreement. Also I think that even though you are a heterosexual couple, you can be civil partnered which means you would be married in all but name. It's not usual for mixed couples, but I think it can be done.

findingmyownway

Good luck in finding a solution for this. My mum and her partner (who i constantly refer to as my step dad but he's not really!) still live apart. They are waiting for my brother to grow up and leave home before moving in together (he is 23yo and counting LOL)

nearlyrich

You can name who you like as your next of kin with responsibility for medical decisions.

elisebutt65

findingmyownway wrote: »

Good luck in finding a solution for this. My mum and her partner (who i constantly refer to as my step dad but he's not really!) still live apart. They are waiting for my brother to grow up and leave home before moving in together (he is 23yo and counting LOL)

I ain't waiting that long!!! Kids will be booted out when they start Uni :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

calleyw

lady_stardust wrote: »

Also I think that even though you are a heterosexual couple, you can be civil partnered which means you would be married in all but name. It's not usual for mixed couples, but I think it can be done.

Don't believe that is so as the civil partnerships only extend to same sex couples. Because heterosexual couples have a choice they can get married or not.

Yours


Calley