student living @ home - how much is fair to contribute?

Savvy_Sue

megsykins wrote:

If it helps, out of my friends who got jobs instead of uni, the average board and lodgings is about £40 pw, although most offer their parents petrol money and pay their share of phone bills.

However, those who stayed at home and were studying weren't charged anything, their parents (and mine) said that they didn't want work to get in the way of studying and would rather support their kids so they didn't need a part-time job. I know not everyone is in the same financial situation, but I'm very surprised at parents trying to take rent money off a student child.

Don't mean to offend anyone and I can see where you're coming from with the responsibility side, but wouldn't you rather that your dauaghter could concentrate on her degree and not have to worry about working enough hours to pay the rent.

Well I think most of us would set the rent according to what they were able to earn in a reasonable amount of time, rather than expecting them to take 2 or 3 part-time jobs to pay for whatever rent we felt would cover costs! Daughter in this case is already working, if she carries on working 16 hours pw @ £4 ph that's £64 pw 'pocket money', now what comes out of that? Travel, phone top ups, clothes, toiletries - all of that, I hope, rather than expecting parents to cough up for them as well!

But in light of increased responsibility - turning 18, becoming a student, expecting to be treated like an adult! - I'd want a little towards food, thank you very much. Plus, as I've said before, a contribution in terms of effort - washing up, cooking, shopping etc.

While my son's been in the 6th form, he's had a part-time job at local cinema - 2 evenings and Sunday afternoons. I haven't taken anything off him, but another consideration is that I would have done if he'd been the kind of lad to spend it all. As it is he's in a position not to have to ask us to pay his fees now he's off to Uni. When (IF?) he comes home for the holidays, I probably won't charge him, although if he gets a job round here next summer I may do so, as another poster has said, I've lost his Child Benefit and he will expect to eat!

I'm sure it varies from course to course and student to student, but I think my son is capable of balancing his studies, his social life (he's not a party animal, which helps!) and a part-time job if he chooses to. If he was at home he would certainly be able to do so!

Stevenj214

megsykins wrote:

I know not everyone is in the same financial situation, but I'm very surprised at parents trying to take rent money off a student child.

Do you have any idea how patronising that sounds? I live with my gran, and there's no way her pension could pay all the bills and buy all the food (that I mostly eat).

A part time job (16 hours at the weekend) is not going to interfere with studying.

16hours @ £5p/h = £4160pa (tax free)
My student bursary = circa £2000
My student loan = circa £2000

So my annual 'income' would be £8160

My grans would be around £5500

So to me, paying rent is a no brainer

Darren21

I'm sorry but I fail to see how a part-time job of 16hrs a week would not affect study (unless its a very undemanding course).

Uni's would certainly frown upon this many hours and I think more time studying is much better than earning poxy money while studying.

It's all down to circumstances really, if you have to work to pay the bills you have to, but certainly not a good idea to work 16hrs if you don't have to. There's no way I'd of got a 1st doing that!

I lived at home 2yrs out of 3 at uni and didn't pay anything. Same for everyone else I knew who lived at home and went to uni. But obviously if you have to charge your kids to pay the bills then you have to, end of story.

fruityslh

I was in the same situation as Stevej214, I lived with my Nan during holidays while I was studying and i paid her £100 a month plus phone charges when the bill came in and I was more than aware after living in digs during term time that it wasn't sufficient to cover what I actually consumed, however only you can set what you feel is a reasonable amount. Maybe you could come to a deal and say she needs to save money to pay her fees next year and she gives you that amount and you save it

Stevenj214

Darren21 wrote:

I'm sorry but I fail to see how a part-time job of 16hrs a week would not affect study (unless its a very undemanding course).

16 hours is saturday and sunday 9-5, or 3 evenings a week in a bar.

about 2/3 of students have a part time job

Darren21 wrote:

IUni's would certainly frown upon this many hours and I think more time studying is much better than earning poxy money while studying.

most uni's offer an employment service to find part time work

Darren21 wrote:

It's all down to circumstances really, if you have to work to pay the bills you have to, but certainly not a good idea to work 16hrs if you don't have to. There's no way I'd of got a 1st doing that!

I think that says more about you as a person. There is plenty of reasons why people would take a part time job even if they didn't need money - meeting new people, gaining experience, enjoying the whole experience of university and starting to do things for themselves.

Darren21 wrote:

But obviously if you have to charge your kids to pay the bills then you have to, end of story.

Obviously if you can leech off of "mummy" and "daddy" then you're a much better person than people who can't.

stellagypsy

Son is staying at home as he is going local and is dyslexic soneeds support. He will be on 75% loan and has P/T job 10 hours per week in a bar. I wasn't going to take anything from him (I can afford not to) but I feel that at 19, he should pay something towards the cost of his keep so I am going to charge him £50 per month which is roughly 1 week's shopping money. The only extra he costs me really is the food he eats - gas / electric would be same, he keeps his room tidy (strange boy!), doesn't create a lot of washing, prefers shower to bath so water meter doesn't whirr round, buys his own clothes and anything "fancy" he wants, pays his own mobile phone top-ups. Also re the food, he is on a diet at the moment (getting rid of his pizza belly before freshers week!) so he isn't really eating a large amount!

He has no idea with money and I am hoping between us we can sort out a basic budget for him which I can supervise and then he can try it on his own, but it won't be easy! Although he has got to Uni it is not an academic discipline, it is something he is gifted at. He finds anything to do with numbers horrifying.

gemma1585

I lived at home for the first two years of uni and found I honestly couldn't afford to pay my parents any rent...the reason being - I bought a car.

My mum appreciated that I wasn't drinking my money away so any luxuries and all my clothes and toiletries I paid for, (basically she provided my room space, hot water, most of my food and she also done my washing).

She made sure I made a fair contribution to the cleaning and upkeep of the house, and to be honest you can't really get much fairer than that!

venace

I think charging your child to live with you while they are still in education is abit unfair, id be abit ticked off if i had to work in uni, and then work a job, and then not have enough money to enjoy myself cause my parents took it, when you probably dont even need it. But im a student so im baised

Savvy_Sue

venace wrote:

I think charging your child to live with you while they are still in education is abit unfair, id be abit ticked off if i had to work in uni, and then work a job, and then not have enough money to enjoy myself cause my parents took it, when you probably dont even need it. But im a student so im baised

If you read this and the linked posts, you'd see that most of us are considering whether or not the parents NEED the money.

Once you are 18 you are seen as an adult, if not by your parents (I know, mine will always be my babies ...) then by the benefits system. You may not realise it, but as soon as you turned 18 your mum (probably her claiming it) lost over £40 per month Child Benefit off her budget, and in some families that's a heck of a lot of money. Plus in other families there will be a loss of Child Tax Credit, possibly Working Tax Credit, not to mention the possibility of losing Housing Benefit and / or Council Tax Benefit if either of those are being claimed because there is now another ADULT living at home.

Plus as parents we are keen for our offspring to grow up into responsible adults, and there is a consensus among most of the students that those whose parents constantly bailed them out and / or threw money at them have graduated with NO IDEA of the cost of living in the real world.

If my sons feel that I'm being unfair in what I expect of them, now or in the future, I expect they'll tell me, and we can discuss the household budget. As it is, my eldest isn't complaining that I've told him we can't pay his fees, in fact he lent me money this week to tide us over the fact that I was locked out of our savings account and couldn't transfer the money I needed to pay a bill!

ben500

student living @ home - how much is fair to contribute?

I reckon about three bottles each should be fair :beer: