student living @ home - how much is fair to contribute?

harpo1

Eldest is starting uni this term.
She will be living @ home - well at least for the moment. She works 16 hours a week in M&S and keeps it all
Feel she is adult enough to contribute to the family coffers - but how much is fair. We have 2 other teenagers, who require food, water & other maintenance
We will be paying her fees about £1000 I think, and although both her dad & I are lucky enough to earn, I feel this is a preparation for the big world or am I completely old fashioned & out of touch
Any advice guys?

nearlyrich

I have 2 student children, they will both be living away all acedemic year and returning home in the holidays. I don't take any board money off them in the holidays but I expect them to save a good portion of their holiday earnings, live on the budget we agree and not get into debt except student loan.

I understand that the student loan is less when living at home but to be honest the basic student loan won't cover my daughter's hall fees and I will have to pay tuition fees too. My son is in a student house this coming year and his rent has dropped but he will have to find bills on top.

In your position I would probably charge a small amount of rent and if it wasn't actually needed to run the household, bank it in a high interest account. If you can afford to carry on feeding No1 Daughter ( I know Child Benefit stops etc). If she was paying rent, feeding herself etc she would be much worse off than living at home and paying board, it probably isn't realistic to have student loan and earnings and not have any responsibility. It is a tough one to call.

johannamse

Whatever you make her pay, show her your monthly utility bills and council tax and all your food receipts for a month. This will show her what a good deal she is getting.

pavlovs_dog

there were several threads in the same vein on the familes and relationships board a while back, such as

how much housekeeping for a 19 yr old?

house keeping charges

and

grown up kids and contributing to household budget

probably worth a punt

Savvy_Sue

I agree she should contribute, just don't know how much! Would depend what she was earning at M&S, how much loan she is getting etc.

Also feel she should contribute as in helping around the house, if not doing so already. My eldest is off in a couple of weeks, but has been doing his own laundry for the last year, and while he's at home this summer is my chauffeur when required (I can't drive at the mo), has also had to go shopping when needed, and has to cook for the family at least once a week (and I usually insist he does this on a day when he's working that evening, to get him used to the idea of pre-planning - if you've got to leave the house at 6.30 pm, only thinking about what we're going to eat at 6.15 pm is NOT a good plan!). As well as playing his full part in washing up. Oh and doing any other odd jobs needed in the garden or around the house.

I feel these things are good preparation for living alone: not just the concept of doing your own laundry, but realising that if you wait until you've got no clean pants, you're going to look pretty silly in the launderette ...

jr666

You can ask her to do as much as you like, but dont expect it to get done. Once she's into the student lifestyle she wont be planning your evening meals or washing your car.

Ask her for a percentage of her salary (40%) to cover everything. When she's living with you, you probably won't be buying all the posh food you may normally. It'll have to be basics tins of beans and tomatoes. Its not fair to ask her to keep up with paying for "non-student" foods.

Are you sure you want to live together next year? :rotfl:

hippypixie

My 19 yr old stepson is doing an apprenticeship and earns around £150 a week, he gives us £30 a week, which is meant to cover all bills, food etc. Of course it doesnt even half cover it, but he is pretty sensible and doesnt go out alot, so has now got almost £3000 saved, which hopefully he will be able to use towards getting his own place eventually.

loopyloo1986

Hi, I'm 19 and earn about £400 a month. I'm getting a loan of £3000 for Uni.
I am an only child and my parents wanted £200 a month off me - I nearly died!
After a wee bit of bargaining I got them down to £150 a month.

Hope that helps.

megsykins

If it helps, out of my friends who got jobs instead of uni, the average board and lodgings is about £40 pw, although most offer their parents petrol money and pay their share of phone bills.

However, those who stayed at home and were studying weren't charged anything, their parents (and mine) said that they didn't want work to get in the way of studying and would rather support their kids so they didn't need a part-time job. I know not everyone is in the same financial situation, but I'm very surprised at parents trying to take rent money off a student child.

Don't mean to offend anyone and I can see where you're coming from with the responsibility side, but wouldn't you rather that your dauaghter could concentrate on her degree and not have to worry about working enough hours to pay the rent.

Stevenj214

Since I went to uni ive paid £30 a week (rent, food, most bills), paid for my own broadband and paid for my own mobile contract

summerday

I can't see whether the OP has said whether her child will be applying for/ receiving a student loan? Quite a few of my friends who studied at home didn't and their parents didn't want them to (to avoid debt etc). Because if your daughter literally only has her part time M&S earnings I guess it is easier to talk about a percentage of what she earns because the figure won't be so high.

IMO you're not be old fashioned at all, I think it's important to encourage kids to be independent. When I moved home after uni to save up a house deposit I insisted on paying my mum a reasonable rent (I paid £120 a month plus £50 for one food shop a month) but she wouldn't have asked for it had I not raised the subject! My sisters do try to milk it sometimes though but in the long run it won't benefit them as the real world and household costs will be a real shock to them!