Depression Support Thread

Horasio

Sorry to hear about your hamster FG

(((Big hugs)))

LadyMorticia

Heya everyone.

I'm so sorry to hear about your hamster FG. [[[[[[hugs]]]]]]

Sorry I haven't posted earlier. I feel really faint and weak so just about have the energy to type.lol.

I hope everyone is doing okay.

xx

Tiff_2

Hi guys!:hello:
Whut?!
Can't a Tiff get any sleep around here?!!
All right, all right - I'm vertical, okay? This however, may only be a temporary situation!





_pale_ :silenced:!

NO - it is not because of the catnip!......



Always blaming the catnip!

How's peeps this afternoon? Morning sazzy!
Well, we've got 28 degrees, (not related to the Three!), here in the Costa del Warwickshire, and as Windsor Davies and the gang used to say, ''It Ain't Half Hot, Mum!'' You'll only remember this if you were conscious around 1977.

As you've got me up,, I'll do a spot of Tiffing until the caffeine wears off. You have been warned!
Tiffy hugs to all.
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

Tiff_2

Hi drifter!:hello:
How are you drifter? I hope you're feeling a bit better this afternoon. I hear you were in a car accident hun - hope you're ok!

drifter wrote:

i get called+have no friends i noticed people bogged off th eother night i sick of exsisting[/drifter]

I'm sorry you felt this way drifter. Nothing could be further from the truth sweetie. You've had quite a few sincere welcomes here angel, from diamond, ladym, shaz, fg and myself to name but a few.
I'm sure everyone understands that you've got such a lot to deal with hun and you won't find a nicer bunch of people than on here - promise! I think there's just been a misunderstanding drifter, because you tend to post around 2.00a.m.- 3.15a.m., and so most of the thread are asleep then, or are finally able to go to sleep after some insomnia. Please don't take it personally angel, you're not being ignored. Feel free to post whenever you want hunnie and I'm sure people will understand your health situation and will reply as soon as they can.
I hope this has reassured you drifter hun. Take care angel.
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

LadyMorticia

Heya Tiff.

Tiff_2

Hi shaz!:hello:
How's you hunnie? You're another soul who sounds as if they're in a really low state right now. I'm sorry I didn't see your post before now hun. Let's have a look...
MEGA TIFFY POST WARNING!!!
PART 1

shaz wrote:

morning all, hope everyone is feeling better day. i have an awful headache, my own fault, drank loads of cider last night, i've been so good with cutting down til this week, but it did help me sleep,
the reason i had so much to drink, was i felt so low last night and so very ashamed of myself, wanted to SH again, but knew that would make things at home a thousand times worse right now.
hate myself so much for what i've done, so ashamed and so upset.

You're using a very common weapon here angel - you're destroying your self-estem with punishing thoughts. I understand that you have double the issues that most of us have with having the twins to look after, but you have to look after yourself too hunnie. On top of your own mental health issues shaz, you've got too disabled boys to look out for, and hunnie, anyone would feel exhausted with all of that!
I can understand how desperately tired you feel and how much you need to sleep, but please try and stay away from alcohol sweetheart. Are you on any medication hunnie?

Okay, I'm going to stop !!!!!footing (groan ) around angel...
- You wanted to self-harm, BUT YOU DIDN'T!
- Thank heavens you've got nothing else but a hangover!
- You have nothing to be ashamed about and no reason to hate yourself!
- We're right there with you too hun - getting upset is allowed!
- You sound as though you're physically and mentally exhausted hunnie, so you are bound to feel this way!
- No-one declared you super-woman, but that's the role you're expected to take.

shaz wrote:

if my sons hadnt seen the scars from the SH i doubt he would have done what he did yesterday :mad:
he only 13 and cut both of his arms, whan i spoke to him, he said it was cos he was angry and upset, and if it helped mum, then it would help him. crying as i type this, hurts so much, to know its my fault he did something like that
big hugs all shaz xxx

I'm so sorry to hear about DS's s-h, angel. Again, I won't waste time fluffing around because you wanted some input angel.

- Have you told your sons why you have the scars hunnie? S-h is part of your mental health issue shaz and doesn't make you a bad parent.
- We can all guess at how and what might have happened sweetheart, but it doesn't help you. For example, did you start s-h because of someone showing you how, hunnie?
- You have to remember angel, that your DS is also suffering from mental il health. You can't take the blame for everything shaz hun.
- I can understand why this has devastated you sweetie - any mom would feel the same, regardless of the situation, if their child is hurt.
- In my humble opinion, it's time to step back and honestly re-evaluate your situation hun and work out a plan for what happens next. I know that's easier said than done angel, but you've got all the support of the peeps here.

Practical things first...
- The priority is to keep DS and yourself safe. Yes, you'll need eyes in the back of your head but try and remove anything obvious that DS might use for further self-harm. And who better to know what might be put to that use? Equally though, you can't watch any child 24/7.

- Discuss with DS that he has to find another way of dealing with his anger - see what possibilities there are, like coming to talk to you. I know it's hard with any teenager, hunnie.

- Do you have any family or friends nearby that can lend a hand - or even an ear?

- Do you have a social worker assigned to you angel?

- Make sure you forewarn DS's school about what has happened with his self-harm and tell them that you are in contact with Social Services.

- Monday a.m. - call social services as soon as they open and tell them you need an emergency call/apointment or visit. make sure they understand that ''No.'' is not an option and that if they don't give you something in the morning, you'll have no choice but to bring the children into the care of the Children's Team at their offices as you cannot manage any more. You see what sudden resources might become available then hun! Every social services department in the country has this issue but that is not your problem - your problem is that you and your children are at risk and you need the to assist you. I'll warn you hunnie, they'll um and ahh about it, but you have to stand your ground. If they don't do anything for you toorrow, appear at their offices on Tuesday morning.

- An uneasy thought I know - although maybe sometimes we parents just need to know that it is okay to make this choice - but how would you feel about them going into temporary respite care angel? You'd know they were safe and as soon as you were on your feet, they would come home. Meanwhile, they could visit you at home or you could all meet up elsewhere, plus there's the phone and computer and letters to keep in touch as much as you all want. They'd be placed as close to you as possible. You could tell them that they're just going on a little holiday - they won't know your reasons. Isn't one of the boys at residential school in the week, hunnie?
There is nothing to be ashamed of hunnie. You all just need some extra support for right now. Getting on your feet and you all being safe is what's most important shaz.

- Also on Monday, make sure you book into the drs for yourself, and maybe even DS angel. Drs carry a lot of weight and you're obviously struggling and in need of immediate help.:A
Nearly broken MSE...
PART 2 next post shaz!
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

Tiff_2

Hi shaz!:hello:
Right - where was I? Oh yes...PART 2...

gilly wrote:

Aren't there services that look after them for a day or weekend? I'm sure I've heard of this...........Tiff will know.xxx

Yes hunnie, gilly-badgie is absolutely correct - there are services in place to help you with respite and support. I went off down into the Tiff Archives and found some research for you and so this little lot should keep you busy until Christmas! Here are some links - I've tried to keep them local to Wakefield shaz - but as usual sweetheart, use your own judgement because I'm not a professional...

http://www.wakefield.gov.uk/HealthAndSocialCare/ChildrenAndYoungPeople/ChildrenWithDisabilities/ChildrenWithDisabilitiesFAQs.htm?wbc_purpose=basicdefauefdefault.htmdefault.htmdefault.htmdefault.htmdefault.htm

http://www.wakefield.gov.uk/HealthAndSocialCare/ChildrenAndYoungPeople/ChildrensDirectory/ChildrensServiceDirectory/Default.htm?recordID=133&searchType=sss

http://www.wakefield.gov.uk/HealthAndSocialCare/ChildrenAndYoungPeople/ChildrensDirectory/ChildrensServiceDirectory/Default.htm?recordID=76&searchType=title

http://www.wakefield.gov.uk/HealthAndSocialCare/ChildrenAndYoungPeople/ChildrensDirectory/ChildrensServiceDirectory/Default.htm?recordID=98&searchType=title

TitleContact a FamilyAgencyVoluntary OrganisationArea(s)WF1, WF2, WF3, WF4, WF5, WF6, WF7, WF8, WF9, WF10, WF11, WF12, WF13, WF14, WF15, WF16, WF17, All AreasDescriptionContact a Family is a UK charity supporting families with disabled children, including health conditions and rare disorders. We provide information and advice including factsheets on all issues affecting families e.g. assessments, benefits and special educational needs. We also produce the Contact a Family directory for specific conditions, rare disorders and national support groups. Age Groups :0-4, 5-13, 14-19


TitleFamily FundAgencyVolunatry OrganisationArea(s)WF1, WF2, WF3, WF4, WF5, WF6, WF7, WF8, WF9, WF10, WF11, WF12, WF13, WF14, WF15, WF16, WF17, All AreasDescriptionThe Family Fund is the largest independent grant-giving organisation, helping families in the UK caring for a severly disabled child/children living at home. The Fund supports families through the provision of grants that relate to the needs of their disabled child or young person, provided the family meets the Funds grant making criteria. Help is given in the form of grants that must relate to the disabled childs needs and can only be offered for children aged 15 and under. The Fund works with an annual fixed budget.Age Groups :0-4, 5-13, 14-19


TitleI CANAgencyCharity (Childrens)Area(s)WF1, WF2, WF3, WF4, WF5, WF6, WF7, WF8, WF9, WF10, WF11, WF12, WF13, WF14, WF15, WF16, WF17, All AreasDescriptionI CAN exists to help children communicate. Our special focus is the children who find this hard: children with a communication disability. I CAN provides a combination of specialist therapy and education for children with the most severe and complex disabilities, information for parents and training and advice for teachers and other professionals. We also work to ensure that the needs of these children are taken into account in all childrenAge Groups :0-4, 5-13, 14-19


TitleLeisure Link (The Home Based Break Service)AgencySocial Services and Health and Children's FundArea(s)WF1, WF2, WF3, WF4, WF5, WF6, WF7, WF8, WF9, WF10, WF11, WF12, WF13, WF14, WF15, WF16, WF17, All AreasDescriptionLeisure Link is for children and young people over the age of 8 years old who have disabilities. It provides them with the support they need to take part in leisure activities in the community. Time is spent with individual children to identify favourite activities, going out and about after school or at weekends to parks, swimming, bowling, shopping etc. This can be on a one to one basis but often the children and young people prefer to meet up with their friends and join in with group activities.Age Groups :5-13, 14-19


TitleRainbow HouseAgencyHealthArea(s)WF10DescriptionWe provide short break care to children who meet our access criteria. A multi disciplinary team work with families to improve the health of the child and the family by providing support away from home and strategies to put in place in the home focusing on the childs needs.Age Groups :5-13, 14-19


TitleRiding for the Disabled (Ackworth Group)AgencySports for recreation and therapyArea(s)WF7, WF8, WF9, WF10, WF11DescriptionThe centre provides therapeutic riding for a complete range of physical and learning impairments and also for children and young people with behavioural problems.Age Groups :5-13, 14-19


TitleSaturday ClubAgencyEducationArea(s)WF1, WF2, WF3, WF4, WF5, WF6, WF7, WF8, WF9, WF10, WF11, WF12, WF13, WF14, WF15, WF16, WF17, All AreasDescriptionA youth work provision for 13-19 year olds. The service targets people with disabilities.Age Groups :All age groups


TitleSpecial AbilitiesAgencyCommunity Group/Organisation/ClubArea(s)WF1, WF2, WF3, WF4, WF5, WF6, WF7, WF8, WF9, WF10, WF11, WF12, WF13, WF14, WF15, WF16, WF17, All AreasDescriptionSpecial Abilities is a peer led organisation working to promote equality of opportunities, choices and independence for all disabled children and adults across all services including education, training, work placement and employment. We provide information, advice, training and support around disability issues to parents/carers of a disabled child and adults with a disability.Age Groups :All Age Groups


TitleThe Home Based Break ServiceAgencyFamily ServicesArea(s)WF1, WF2, WF3, WF4, WF5, WF6, WF7, WF9, WF10, WF11, WF12, WF13, WF14, WF15, WF16, WF17DescriptionThe Home Based Break Service is based within the Childrens Disability Service. It is an outreach service which offers care and support to disabled children and young people between the ages of 0-18 years and their families. This support may take the form of: HOME SUPPORT, care and support in a child/young persons home. This may be alongside parents/carers or independently of them. Or Membership of the LEISURE LINK SCHEME, for children with disabilities or young people over the age of 8. It provides them with the support they need to take part in leisure activities within the district. Age Groups :0-4, 5-13, 14-19


TitleThe Hyperactive Childrens Support GroupAgencyCommumity Group/Organisation/ClubArea(s)WF1, WF2, WF3, WF4, WF5, WF6, WF7, WF8, WF9, WF10, WF11, WF12, WF13, WF14, WF15, WF16, WF17, All AreasDescriptionThe hyperactive ChildrenAge Groups :0-4, 5-13, 14-19


TitleThe Open DoorAgencyClub for young people of all abilities including learning disability / sensory-physical disabilitiesArea(s)WF1, WF2, WF3, WF4, WF5, WF6, WF7, WF8, WF9, WF10, WF11, WF12, WF13, WF14, WF15, WF16, WF17, All AreasDescriptionAn inclusive youth club setting providing activities and opportunities for young people of all abilities.Age Groups :5-13, 14-19


TitleWakefield Autism Leisure ClubAgencyCommumity Group/Organisation/ClubArea(s)WF1, WF2, WF3, WF4, WF5, WF6, WF7, WF8, WF9, WF10, WF11, WF12, WF13, WF14, WF15, WF16, WF17, All AreasDescriptionTo provide sports and leisure activities for children and adults aged 7 upwards with autism and other learning difficultiesAge Groups :5-13, 14-19

TitleWakefield Parent Partnership ServiceAgencyFamily ServicesArea(s)WF1, WF2, WF3, WF4, WF5, WF6, WF7, WF8, WF9, WF10, WF11DescriptionWakefield Parent Partnership Service offers independent advice, information and support to parents whose children have special educational needs. We aim to meet the needs of children with SEN by enabling and supporting parents. The Parent Partnership service aims to develop partnerships between parents, schools, the local education authority and voluntary groups for the benefit of all children with SEN. It aims to give parents a voice so that their views are taken into consideration in the planning and delivering of services.Age Groups :0-4, 5-13, 14-19


TitleWakefield Riding for the DisabledAgencyCommumity Group/Organisation/ClubArea(s)WF1, WF2, WF3, WF4, WF5, WF6, WF7, WF8, WF9, WF10, WF11, WF12, WF13, WF14, WF15, WF16, WF17, All AreasDescriptionTo provide riding and carriage driving for people with special needs.Age Groups :All Age Groups


TitleWakefield Support Group for AutismAgencyCommunity Group/Organisation/ClubArea(s)WF1, WF2, WF3, WF4, WF5, WF6, WF7, WF8, WF9, WF10, WF11, WF12, WF13, WF14, WF15, WF16, WF17, All AreasDescriptionSupport group for families of children and adults with autism, who also arrange various activities for children and their families. We hold monthly adult only meetings, with speakers and produce a monthly newsletter. We also have a comprehensive library and a website.Age Groups :0-4, 5-13, 14-19


National Autistic Society
http://www.nas.org.uk
The UK's foremost charity for people with autism/Asperger syndrome and those who care for them. About Autism
http://www.aboutautism.org.uk
A website written by parents for parents with autistic children. It includes constructive advice based on experience, and a section on education. Wakefield Support Group for Autism
http://www.wakefieldsupportgroupautism.org
The local support group which offers help for parents and people with autism.

After 16 – what’s new?
http://www.after16.org.uk
This website is for teenagers and young people in the UK who have an impairment or disability and describes the opportunities and services available once they leave school.


http://www.wakefield.gov.uk/HealthAndSocialCare/Carers/WakefieldCarersAssoc/default.htm
What can Carers Wakefield and District do for you? Carers Resource Room, Helping Carers to Take a Break - ‘My Time’ holiday/college/trip assistance for carers,

Connect
The ‘Connect’ scheme was set up to help support families who have a child with a disability.



We are an independent advice, information and support service for parents/carers of children with special educational needs.
http://www.wakefieldparentpartnership.org.uk/

Parentline Plus (http://www.parentlineplus.org.uk/)
Parentline Plus is a UK registered charity that offers support to anyone parenting a child - the child's parents, stepparents, grand parents and foster parents. It can be accessed by a freephone helpline.


http://www.wakefieldsupportgroupautism.org/
http://www.wakefieldsupportgroupautism.org/activ.html

http://maps.google.co.uk/local_url?q=http://www.southwestyorkshire.nhs.uk/content/services/servicedetails.aspx?SiteID=163&dq=social+services&hl=en-GB&ie=UTF-8&near=Wakefield&fb=1&view=text&latlng=974719714603938026&oi=md_references&sa=X&ct=reference&cd=1&ei=T5AmSKzfI4bk2wK-qp3tCg&sig2=By-emR-hcrJKKWZAq_Rtvw&s=ANYYN7nfjCFKE1NGO8XK12V4YW4b8iiymA

http://www.locallife.co.uk/wakefield/socialservices3.asp

Now these agencies will offer different things - from new activities for the boys, even with their disabilities to short respite care to short breaks away for you all. There are parental support groups listed too. In addition, you may want to contact your local children's mental health team for advice. And a referral from your social worker, mental health team or gp may get help with finances or arrangements from the Family Welfare Association. As your boys are both disabled, you should be entitled to some kind of Direct Payment assistance from social services probably even for respite care, which you can also check out on t'interet!
Sorry for the length of this post guys and also for any repetitions in the list shaz angel and I hope something here will at least help a little.
Be kind to yourself hunnie and keep us posted okay?
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

Tiff_2

Hi guys!:hello:
I'm so sorry that there's so many of you I want to reply to and haven't yet, including ccstar and ladym (I know about DLA and IS, hun. You can spend that cheque. - and make sure you drink and eat something little throughout the day in this heat - you don't want to get dehydrated hun!)), but I'm all out of Tiffing for right now.

Sending special hugs to pc. And I'm sorry to hear about your hamster fg hun.

So...



...or better still, sazzy's windows! - loves ya saz - honest!
To all you lovely peeps, huge Tiffy hugs.
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

LadyMorticia

Thanks Tiff. I was getting worried in case I wasn't entitled to it. My project worker said "Spend it. The government is so tight with their money they're not exactly going to give it to you if you're not entitled to it".lol. But I just wanted to make sure, so thank you.

I'm trying to drink but eating is the part I struggle with. =/

xx

Tiff_2

LadyMorticia wrote: »

Thanks Tiff. I was getting worried in case I wasn't entitled to it. My project worker said "Spend it. The government is so tight with their money they're not exactly going to give it to you if you're not entitled to it".lol. But I just wanted to make sure, so thank you.

I'm trying to drink but eating is the part I struggle with. =/

xx

You're welcome hunnie. They're streamlining (yeah right!) the benefits, so that they can pay all in ne go where possible. If you're on long term DLA, you get it separate from your IS and it is paid to you every 28 days exactly.

I think we're all struggling with eating in this heat sweetie. Try salad or fruit at least. if you ca, get some soup inside you. Little and often is the trick, hun.

...Hey...when did we change the topic to my love life?!...
I'd be grateful for either! Sorry guys!
I bet sazzy's coffee just sprayed everywhere!
Much Love,
Tiff xxx