Am I right to feel so annoyed?

Dammam

Also, isn't it a pain when people assume you're well off? People have said constantly that because the town I come from is known as a wealthy area, I must be "loaded" - where's the bloody logic in that? If I lived near Buckingham Palace I wouldn't have as much money as the Queen would I??????

Its' become apparent to me that many people who appear affluent on the outside are actually living on credit, and therefore walking a financial tightrope. Try to live within your financial means leaves you open to ridicule. What would happen to this woman if the maintenance stopped coming in, tax credits were suspended etc?

And I agree so much - bricks & mortar can't replace family & friends.

Sarahsaver

ancasta wrote:

I know this is a harsh thing to say, but cant you report her for benefit fraud or something similar as she is TOTALLY playing the system and people like that give genuine cases a VERY bad name.

Slap the b!tch is my suggestion

*rant over*

Here Here!

larmy16

Hi Rage in Eden

I typed out a reply to you, then the computer went all funny, so I am trying again.

I have a former close friend who is a single parent, gets income support, works off the cards, gets maintenance (unknown to CSA), but it is the unending financial support of her family which puts her in a financial category far superior to my own!

Am I jealous? At times yes!!! However, when it really boils down to it, I would not swap my life with anyones, neither hers nor Victoria Beckhams!

When I do get those envious flashes I try to remind myself of wise words contained in the poem Desiderata.

"Never compare yourself to others as you may become vain or bitter. For always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself......"

Those women you work with sounds like major bi***es, so I hope you can get the hell out of there. Incidentally the situation you have described is why I made going self employed my major goal in life!!

One day, when you are holding that baby in your arms, remember those old harpies, give baby a big cuddle and count your very many blessings (even if you are skint)>

By the way, I cant afford holidays either. People think I am wierd because I love my home so much, that to me having a week at home is a holiday in itself!

Good luck

tr3mor

ancasta wrote:

I know this is a harsh thing to say, but cant you report her for benefit fraud or something similar as she is TOTALLY playing the system and people like that give genuine cases a VERY bad name.

Slap the b!tch is my suggestion

*rant over*

Seconded, shop her to the benefits agency, and then see the smile wiped off her face when she can't pay her credit card bills!

trafalgar_2

ancasta wrote:

report her for benefit fraud

This sort of thing is why people who really need it can't get as much as they should.report her if you know she is doing wrong

Bargainloverbec

Rage - it must be so frustrating working with people like that - she has no right to pass judgement on you or anyone else with what you choose to do with your money.

Having said that, no one really knows what goes on in other people's lives, she may 'seem' better off but who knows whether she is happy and I certainly wouldn't want to increase my income by fraudulent means. I'd rather have money that I had rightfully earned and felt I deserved.

Grit your teeth and keep smiling Rage - these people are not worth your time worrying over.

Hugs,

Rebecca

benjacksmum

Hi Rage,

I completely agree with everyone else and this woman is nothing more than a fraudster! You mentioned that she was always in the pub - ask yoursefl where are her children while she's boozing away? I am sure that when the time comes you will make a far superior mother filling your children's memories with happy days at home.

One thing I did pick up on was the fact you mentioned she took other people's children to school and got paid for this. I have just finished as a Registered Chlidminder and can tell you that if these children are under 8 they fall under Ofsted's jurisdiction. Childminding works to a set of National Standards, one of which mentions that is it illegal in this country to look after children for reward for more than two hours per week. If this is the case, I would report her to Ofsted if I were you. The number to report her on is 0845 601 4772. Just say you know of an unregistered childminder and give them the relevant details, address etc and they will take it from there.

Regarding the maternity pay bit, 3 years ago I was EXACTLY like you! I took on a 9-5 job in an office and absolutely hated it with a passion!!! Double standards, !!!!!ing, it all went on there. I would have left but it coincided with us wanting to try for our second child and I knew I would qualify for the maternity pay if I hung on. I feel pregnant pretty quick and had already worked out my leaving date but then, possibly to some degree caused by the stress of that hell hole, I suffered a miscarriage at just under 2 months, started whilst I was sat at my desk. It took me another 12 months to fall pregnant (we think it happened whilst on a couple of weeks off when I wasn't so stressed out) but it was worth it to come out being paid £100 per week for the next 6 months and knowing full well I wasn't going back but I didn't tell them that until about 4 weeks before I was due to return, citing my reasons which were I was not prepared to put up with such childish behaviour from other fellow, so called senior employees! It felt wonderfully smug and of course during those six months, I had got myself registered as a childminder so had already got a 'job' to return to.

Rage, you are well above these people at work, cause a little hell for them, get pregnant and then leave them high and dry! I bet they will soon miss you when you're gone!

All the best
Ang x

Loadsabob

That IS frustrating. I know Family Tax credits benefit some people, and I am all for lifting children out of poverty (however, I'd rather see the money and the cost of administering it go into free childcare across the board for those who want it, so every penny earned working actually makes them better off, OR into making a decent living wage across the board, of at least £7 an hour).

BUT, I have known two people receiving these benefits who really made a mockery of it. One worked full time with me, had two children, was a single parent, owned her home, her parents had paid of most of her mortgage, and gave her pocket money. She had a new car, bought new clothes most lunchtimes and went on at least two foreign holidays per year...oh, and had facials, manicures and leg waxing every other week! This is when we were on £9600 in the building society. And yet, because of her various benefits and tax back, her take-home was more than my gross pay!!!!

The other was temping in my office, and her husband was a builder. Considering the amount of tax credits she had, I assume most of his work was cash in hand. They had four children, a detached house with pool, two cars, the biggest TV you can imagine, and went to Florida twice a year. When she received a revised tax credit assessment, which she insisted on opening in the office, she said "Oh, £100 extra week, time to go shopping!". I could have thumped her.

Makes a mockery of those who really rely on these benefits to make ends meet.

Anyway, I agree that those who appear affluent are often living on credit. And I agree too how annoying it is when people make assumptions about your finances. I live in a really nice part of town, now, all big houses and sea views. However, I rent, and my place is stuck onto the back of one of these houses, with only a view of walls. But I love my little house, and have a garden. I live well because I budget carefully. I really want to go to Japan and Iceland, but really am not happy to go into debt to do so. But other people think nothing of it. But I've had some lovely cheap holidays that my friends seem to envy.

I think your annoyance is justified!

Bargainloverbec

Forgot to say in my last post about maternity pay - in order to qualify for the full entitlement you only need to have 6 months service with your employer by the time you get to the Qualifying Week which is 15 weeks before the baby is due.

If you work this out it basically means that as long as you don't fall pregnant until the SECOND week in a new job you will get your full entitlement which is 90% of average earning for the first 6 weeks of your mat leave, then statutory maternity pay for the next 20 weeks (currently about £106/week). This is the statutory minimum; some companies offer enhanced packages.

So, if you do decide to change jobs then don't worry too much about falling pregnant really quickly as long as you bear these timescales in mind.

HTH.

Rage_in_Eden

i know i should be nice and calm but, well my moniker does give away a facet of my personality doesn't it? I just get sooo annoyed when I see people wroking the system like this because I was a child when my Dad died and Mum promised him she would always be there for me - hence she didn't work and money was a major issue (or the lack of it) - I could tell it was sunday because we had sausages for tea! so I get very angry when i see people who are just laughing at everyone else and taking the money and running - especially when there are so many people out there who are just above the poverty level and don't qualify for much. mind you if i say she was trying to buy live 8 tickets you get the drift of the person......... i did point out to her that the point of live 8 was the G8 summit and did she want to buy a white band off me (I was going to go on the march but that's when i hurt my foot - much better thanks - so didn't) she said she couldn't care less and just wanted to see a great line up!!! :rolleyes: I think I will bide my time on this one.......

Thanks for all your support though.

This might cheer everyone up. At weekend we went to the local greengocers stall on the market and OH wanted me to pay for my veg with the loose change - i pointed out that he knew full well that goes into the piggy banks and then into the ISA. The stallholder listened to this with great interest and chimed in that she saves her 20ps and the other week she emptied her giant bottle and was able to pay her poll tax for the month, her phone and her electric out of it!!!! She has also previously saved £1s and once paid for ther £350 holiday with the contents of that bottle. She then proceeded to tell us about people who turn up with bank bags of 1ps and 2ps and use them for their greens. So we are not alone!!!! (or is that the X-files?) :T