Lending money to friends & family

alex2796

This is such a useful threat, a friend actually just asked me to help her out with getting a flat as she just broke up with her bf etc. After reading this, I guess I will have to think twice about it.

But in case I AM her last hope from being homeless, does anyone have a load agreement sample I can have please? thank you

John_Pierpoint

Get an undated cheque off her for the repayment of the loan.

Bouncing a cheque would make it very difficult for her to argue that it "did not exist" or "was really a gift" etc. etc.

The boot is then on the other foot and the borrower has to explain in court how it is that YOU broke the agreement. In theory she has to go bankrupt to avoid paying up.

Jenna

Alex,

It would probably be better for you and your friend (in the long-run) if you offered her your couch to sleep on whilst she saves up for a flat - I am assuming she plans to rent, so say 2-3 months to save up?

If you decide to lend her the money, mentally, you have to regard it as a gift - don't expect to ever see it again. You can protect yourself to an extent by drawing up a formal agreement about it, you both signed, get it witnessed by an independent person etc ... presuming all parties are over 18 of course ... but if she doesn't pay, think about the impact on your friendship, are you prepared to wreck it by taking her to court over the money? As that's what it may take...

My advice, speaking as someone who lent my ex (partner at the time) several thousand pounds, is that you may get it back eventually - but in dribs and drabs as and when they feel like it. 8 years on I'm still getting the odd £50. Not worth the aggravation and resentment.

allisonmurray783

I think there is no case for borrowed money that has not been paid. Sorry about that.

Lou67

I agree that if someone asks you for money, you have to be prepared to never see that money again, and to be able to let that money go. I would frankly never ever lend anyone money; and I would never ask anyone I knew to lend me some.

adelight

Can anyone advise me on being the one given money?

Ex gave me money as a gift, text me after we broke up (his fault, bad, police involved) saying not to worry about it I still deserved it. Few weeks later he says he now wants it back, has been to a solicitor and has "court papers". He later admitted this was part lie to make me meet up with him - if I do he says he won't. I'm terrified so I'm meeting up with him, but can he really get it back? Would any solicitor bother? He has a fair bit of money and is the sort of person who'll spend more than the gift was trying to get it back to make my life difficult.

If anyone replies please don't quote me.

terryw

From what you have said, even the worst ambulance-chasing shyster would have to give the following advice to him. (This may not be the exact legal expression)

!!!! and wind!

Lou67

Adelight hi...

If there is no paper trail and he didn't give it to you in the form of a cheque (in other words, he just gave it to you as cash; ) he will find it hard to prove that he gave it to you at all, let alone that he gave it you as a loan.

Mojisola

adelight - whatever you do, don't meet up with him if you're frightened! Speak to https://www.womensaid.org.uk/ for support and information about how to deal with him.

Any communication can be kept to letters, emails, texts, etc, and keep copies of everything he sends you.

He has no claim on the money he gave you.

Lou67 - adelight asked not to quote her post.

Lou67

Thanks Mojisola. I never noticed that. Duh! I wonder why the poster doesn't want people to quote though? (Not being funny; just curious...) I will go edit the post now to unquote her!