Heavily in Debt!!!!! Advice please

se999

Hi,

Does Hubby bring the fish home? Fish & meat tend to be the more expensive items of the grocery bill. In lots of countries the norm is to fish to eat!!

He's got all the kit, and presumably the licences, so why not get some benefit from money you've already spent and a skill he presumably has. If it keeps him happy and provides food for free.

If you can't face the fish, the cats will probably love it

Pike and perch and carp are all common menu fishes in europe, so it doesn't mean just the fancy trout/salmon fishing.

Maybe worth a try?

Best wishes for sorting your finances out.

P.S. Have you tried the Old Style area yet? People are very friendly & helpful, and quite a lot of cat lovers there too

sophiedb

We do have the space for a lodger but its finding a reliable one thats trustworthy is the problem - they would be sharing your house.

Very true, but they do exist! At the end of the day, who lives in your spare room is your choice - if you don't like them to begin with, don't accept them as a lodger. Easy to say I know, but thankfully there are still good people in the world and a CAB could probably help draw up an agreement if you wanted.

In 4 years of sharing, we've never had a destructive or thieving lodger and our only problems have been the occasional personality clash. You don't make a fortune, but it has saved us a lot of money, as well as being a good way to make friends.

bluezone

Hi again,
Hubby has to put the fish back - so in my eyes its a waste of time doing it in the first place!! Obviously my parents dont know how much debt we are in exactly but they have an idea of about half the actual figure :-(
They are not happy about the amount of hours I am working in 2 jobs at the moment and are worried if I take on the 3rd one if hubby cant be seen making any extra effort so there are strains on marriage and family now! - Is this normal when you get in debt?

klare_2

Unfortunately it is...
me and my OH are in for the tune of 32k. We are currently with the cccs and all in all things are begining to get a bit better. However our repayments are at the minimum we could ' get away with' as the cccs put it before other options than a DMP would have to be considered, so we are hanging on in there. OH's part of the bargain is that he has to bring in £400 a month .. which baring in mind the sort of work he does shouldnt be that hard. ( I work full time, shifts, he looks after the children both of them under 3) .. anyway, he hasnt managed it once since we went to the CCCS. I am now doing some work for a 'text' company on top of my 40 hours a week regular job. I have never felt so ill in all my life and he just doesnt seem to get that saying to me that ' he understands' how worried I am and so is he... is not enough.. he needs to get out of the house and earn some bloody money. i cant say that he is lazy because he isnt and I love him to death even though all we do is argue these days because we are both so stressed. My house is always spotless, children always happy , garden always done etc ( we dont live in a posh house or anything).. but i wold rather have it scruffy and know that our basic bills are going to be paid. My Mum knows whats going on and is worried sick, I am struggling to keep a lid on all my anger and frustration and my regular job is suffering. I havent been able to concentrate on anything else for the past year so have got 2 distance study courses going to waste ( thankfully both will still be viable once we get sorted if that ever happens).. and quite frankly I have had enough!! i am fed up of being in this situation, I am absolutely knackered beyond how knackered I ever thought it possible for a human being to be in, I am sick to death of the drudgery , I havent had any form of holiday in years and am unlikely to have for many many more, i have to wear crappy clothes and dont have any money to do anything at all. Despite all that I am blessed with beautiful children and yes I do have a roof over my head when there are plenty that dont and we have food in our tummys so I guess I really shouldnt moan so much but sometimes I could just sit in a corner and stay there for ever.
Am going to nip onto ebay to see if I can find a magic wand!!!
:mad:

tinalives

Ahh, klare I know how you feel!

It sounds like you're doing a great job under the circumstances - stick with it, it'll all be worth it in the long run.


x.

Dumbledore55

Bless you , Klare. You're doing a fantastic job and you are right to count your blessings. One day you will reap the benefits and you will get a holiday and some lovely clothes, you deserve it. x

klare_2

thanks....
it feels soooooooooooooooo good to not have to pretend that everything is okay just for a short while whilst I did that post... god i would love to tell people what is really going on instead of having to slap a smile on my face 24/7 and pretend that 'Im all right jack' ( dont actually know a jack but im sure that if I did I would smile at him too cuz lord knows I do it to every other !!!!!! out there!!!) ... just want to be able to wake up one moring and actually not feel tired and have something to look forward to. sure theres loads of you who know what im going on about it!!!!
Anyway.... have to go rescue the baby one from a mountain of crumpets and milk river donated kindly by his elder brother!!!
:rotfl: :rotfl:

tinalives

LOL!!! Glad to see you've still got you sense of humour!

headchef

Klare, what kind of work does your other half do? You say it shouldn't be that hard so I'm curious as to why he isn't pullinging his weight in bringing in the money. Does he find the care of the two children too much? Is he just burying his head? Reading the posts here there always seems to be one partner who just doens't fully understand or won't face up to their dire financial situation. My OH makes all the right noises and feels the stress but comes back with compeletly unsuitable food from the supermarket (he knows the budget he should stick to) for instance. I find myself seething but try and avoid rows because I don't want the stress of the lack of money to destroy our relationship. I try education instead but it's hard work. In fact it obvioulsy isn't working. Reading these posts makes me not feel so quite alone.

SpongeBobSP

Klare,

I remember a saying someone mentioned to me once and it is so true:

'Life without a struggle is colourless'

And Winston Churchill used to say:

'If you are going through hell, just keep going'

Keep going and good luck. It will all be worthwhile in the end.