The giving up/cutting down alcohol support thread!

MARTINS_DOLL

jacktyler wrote: »

i'm thinking about stopping drinking. i've probably posted before on here, but i can't remember.

i'm very ashamed.

can i ask a question?
if i stop, will i still be allowed to speak?

Hi Jack...

You have posted on here before, and you've got loads of friends too...

You can speak and post as much as you like, everyone will give you support cherub.

How are you feeling at the moment?

Luv Jan xxx

jacktyler

i'm going to stop.
i feel too ashamed.
i feel crushed.
almost worthless.

my uncle, a good friend of mine,
said he wanted me to make good.
he said he wasn't bothered that i failed,
he only let out a sigh,
because he wants me to be happy.

i told him about natalie,
and he was shocked,
but he said the best of her is still here.
she never really died, she just went away.

MARTINS_DOLL

Jack,

We want to help you...

PLEASE stay online so that we can talk to you xxx

eselt

Hi all- specially Jack (boy have we all been worried about you)- Jack it sounds like you've had a shock and a bereavement, you need to get to your GP asap and tell him/her about whats happened to you- when people say they are 'crushed' it usually means they are feeling overwhelmed by thoughts and feelings which seem impossible to work through- ask if your GP surgery has a counsellor, or perhaps talk about some medication which might help to get you through this crisis time- most importantly IF YOU FEEL YOU ARE AT RISK you MUST contact someone- theres help out there and we can support you too. For what its worth, you are not worthless, you are important and you deserve to be supported through this, a lot of people here have reached rock bottom in the past, but its important that you know that things can get better, with time and help- I'll be thinking about you, please keep posting.

ambercat

Hi Jack.
How relieved am I to see you are back . I look for a post from you every day. Do you see how much everyone cares about you ? We are all united by our own demons and that makes us all stronger . We are all thinking of you so please dont go away again. There is help to be had from GP's etc but it helps to know you are not alone and no matter how distant we all are, we are reaching out with our hearts to you. Luv, ambercat. xxx

Bismarck

welcome back Jack and good day to all.

when I asked yesterday about "are you trying to beat alcohol", I was referring to those times when people say "I'm gonna beat the booze" etc.

I wanted to warn that it's not something that can be beaten as such...it doesn't feel pain so how can you beat it?

Guess it's too early on a weekend morning to be that philosophical!

hope everyone's ok.

take care

jpmummy

I wonder if anyone on here can help me, I have been with OH for 14 years and we have a five year old son. We both work f/t, but OH works away an comes home at weekends, he is drinking more and more at the weekends and I suspect he does in the week too. He reckons I am a kill joy when I hide his Vodka but I do so because I reckon he drinks when he gets up and I am not in the same room as him. He doesn't think he has a problem but I know he does, he can get loud and picky, although not physical but mentally very nasty with me and then next day says "oh I was drunk I didn't mean it". I don't know how to get him to stop. Does anyone have any ideas? sorry if I have posted in the wrong place. btw I hardly drink, maybe a glass or 2 at weekends.

polaroid

Hi jpmummy, alcohol is an addiction often hidden by denial. unfortunately when in the grasps of alcohol addiction the people who try to help are often the ones who get blamed and get hurt. the first thing to beating it is to realise that you have a problem. i have grown up with alcolics all my life and its the hardest thing to watch someone do it to themselves - yet when i was doing it i didnt think that anyone really noticed; because if i admitted they noticed then i would have been admitting there was a problem.
its difficult to advise you what to do as people with alcohol problems can become very defensive.
there are lots of great people on here though and if Bismark is still on line he will have some pearls of wisom. i think right now if i were in your shoes i would try and sit down with your o/h and try and get to the root of the problem, but i do understand that that is a lot easier said than done.
keep posting, good luck xx

ps hi jack xx

jpmummy

polaroid, thanks for your reply

I have been telling him for years about it, but he just tells me I am a boring killjoy! and then he argues with me. He has now started wetting himself, even that hasn';t told him he has a problem. I am totally fed up with it all and don't know how to convince him that he has a problem.

Pip26

Hi jpmummy - welome!!!!

Is there anything that bothers him or that he can't cope with? Maybe working away, money worries or anything else? ... or triggered by a bereavement or something else happening?

Maybe it might ease a bit if there was a problem/anxiety that could be removed from him, shared or sorted out? - could be a starting point at least.

I'm glad you've found this board because you can log on any time for support/advice, just for chat or to read through some of the other posts - one thing for sure, you sure aren't alone!!

Maybe you could contact/join a voluntary group/councillor/professional for your own support and to give you advice. It might help to talk to other parteners/family members in similar circumstances and to get advice on how to react to him when drunk and how to broach things with him when sober.

Keep in touch.