Dealing with the stress of debt

Merlot

I have been sitting here thinking I know that name Lieutenant Dan......Forest Gump....one of my favourite films, I love Tom Hanks.

I don't have any debt except the mortgage now, but I did in the past, the money issue did keep me awake many a night, thinking about where I could get help, I knew nothing of any debt charities 10 years ago, and of course very few people had a home pc.


Edited to add: we are certainly not well off now, we don't have a plasma/holidays aboard now but we did have all those things when we were in debt, we live within our means now and I can look forward to seeing the postie in the morning instead of dreading it.
Merlot.x.

lieutenant_dan

Merlot wrote: »

I have been sitting here thinking I know that name Lieutenant Dan......Forest Gump....one of my favourite films, I love Tom Hanks.

That's right, that's a nickname that was forced on me a few years ago as my name is Dan, had no choice in the matter, then again neither did another of my mates who is nicknamed Forest, so it could have been worse

Merlot

I have just read bathgatebuyer post, don't know what to say......:grouphug:

Edinburgh is lovely, I got married on the Royal Mile, st Columba free church, and reception in the Stakis Haymarket, I think its the Hilton now....I'm going back in March to take the children to see where we got married, I can't wait I love Scotland.

SpongeBobSP

Yes, I do suffer from the anxiety and stress as well. At the moment I am doing fine, as I am able to pay the mortgage, and the loan and all my bills etc., but at the back of my mind is always the fear of what happens if?

boredofbeingathome

Dealing with the stress of debt is very hard, i don't think i've had a good nights sleep in a long time. My stress isn't all down to debt though it is linked with having to be off work to support my youngest child who has been in and out of hospital with a condition she was born with and then her contracting diabetes on top of it all last year. I suppose i wanted my husband to support me a bit more and take some of the burden off my shoulders but he just seemed to add to it by not paying things and constantly using his credit card for things, i always feel like i'm a nag when i'm asking him to do stuff and it just ends up being a viscious circle. We used up savings to get rid of debts and as he was self employed to pay off his tax bill. I feel like the cushion has gone from under me because the savings were there so i could take time off to support my daughter and now i feel sick that i gave my job up, relieved because i couldn't concentrate anyway and keep taking time off to go to hospital, and fed up because i feel like i keep going 10 rounds with mike tyson but stupidly keep getting up to get knocked down again! Oh god i've been rambling it must be the stress!!!

hooty2001uk

Yes I totally HAD the attitude of "Oh who cares its only money", However NOW things are different....hopefully being careful and continue to do so...xx

cheerfulness4

SpongeBobSP wrote: »

but at the back of my mind is always the fear of what happens if?

Thats exactly how I feel. I sometimes think that our carefully constructed little house of play cards could collapse around us if we get even a small cog in the wheels. The help from this site has changed our lives around but it was a nightmare not long ago.

My experience is similar to others, A & E visit with panic attacks, sleepless nights, physically sicking after reading letters, (only recently started looking forward to the post again). The guilt of my kids having less.. its all the same.

Stupid, isn't it? As a kiddy in the 60/70's we had very little. The day my parents scrapped up for a swing was a massive event in the house. But my parents did have major money worries after dad got poorly for a time. There were no parents to give them a hand out, they had little too. Dad had a stroke and that made things worse as he couldn't work for months.

They coped tho. Mum went mad growning veg in every square inch. Her dresses were remodeled and became our dresses. She unraveled jumpers and reknit for us. We had leek sandwiches with marmite for weeks on end, but they pulled through.

Happy days for me as a child but I don't know for them. Maybe they shielded us from their own unhappiness but mum says things were different then as everyone was in the same boat, helping each other out with 'pass me ons'.

MissEyre

It is hard when you look around you and see that compared to others, you are 'going without'. But then I look at my loan repayments and know I live within my monthly budget, so I know that my debts are reducing, and will be clear in just over four years. That is the real luxury for me-I can live without a new car and three holidays a year because I'd rather live within my means!

cheerfulness4

It is hard sometimes, isn't it? Others seem to be obsessed with spending, as was I not so long ago.
The thrill I get watching each payment made bring us closer to our DFDate is so much greater than that of buying. When I save for something we need, after waiting ages sometimes, I really get excited. I didn't before, almost bored really.

But its expected that we go abroad and have passports. Twice recently, (for and exam entrance and opening a bank account) I was asked for my passport as ID and when I said I hadn't got one they looked shocked.
I've not been abroad in donkeys years as we can't afford it but they couldn't believe it and a mass cafuffle followed. Madness!

grace

This is such a good thread.... Im three years down the line now of repayments...and at the beginning it was utter misery....

I got myself here my thinking everything would always stay the same...I had a really good job, no health worries all was rosey...until I got made redundant....then through the stress of that had a nervous breakdown and could only find temping work....

It has been a long..long hard slog....and I still have moments where I could scream with frustration (mainly with the incompetance of people like nPower for instance)...but I can now take a deep breath...and give them hell...through this site, I have gained mutual support...a good foundation knowledge of my rights....and I know I can do it....we will be debt free by the end of this year!!! at long long last....