18 month old son won't walk

tracyk

My son didn't walk until he was 19 months old & even now (he's 13 in 2 weeks) he's very laid back & does everything at his own pace - don't worry, I'm sure he'll be fine....

nats3006

Hiya,
I wouldnt worry my DS1 didnt walk until he was 22 months, that was in 2005 and he is ok now, please dont worry.

Let us know how it goes tomorrow.

Mutantk

I'm sorry to hear of the worry you have both been faced with. I'm a firm believer in listening to health visitor but not taking it as gospel. As a parent though you can't help but worry can you and I sympathise with your wife having suffered PND after birth of my number 2 daughter..... and a careless although well-meaning comment or suggestion from HV can stay with you and upset you for ages afterwoods.
Can I just say though, and I hope you don't mind, but you are obviously a very supportive partner to go to the trouble of discussing the issue here and for worrying and caring as you obviously do. Believe me from experience that even if you think you're not helping or doing enough for your wife - YOU ARE. Best of luck to you all...........and incidently one of my girls was just shy of 20th months before she walked....and had no problem!

Nicki

In my experience some HV are clueless about both child development and PND, and I hope your wife can put this stupid ill informed remark out of her mind.

I had bad PND after the birth of my second child and was also hospitalised twice. When she was diagnosed at 2 with autism, a HV told me that this had probably been caused by my poor parenting skills whilst suffering from PND, despite the fact that all the research shows that this is rubbish!

All babies develop at different rates and 18 months is not too far adrift from the average for walking. Also women don't choose to suffer from PND and so are not to blame for it. No one says that if a woman has pre-eclampsia or gestational diabetes, that it is her fault if her child is born underweight, and in the same way if a woman has PND it is not her fault if her child is slower to develop some skills. Presumably no one is saying your child will never walk just that it is taking him a bit longer to get there.

Hope your wife is now recovering. If it is possible, perhaps she should consider moving to a different clinic with a better HV, or at the very least mentioning to her GP what the HV said if the HV is linked to your local GP's service.

splishsplash

Is he crawling?
It's not the timing so much as the sequence in development that's important. Development in one area may be faster than in others, as another poster said.
Once he's followed a fairly steady path in rolling over, sitting up, going on all fours and crawling on all fours, then pulling up, then I would get a check-up just to be on the safe side, but wouldn't worry too much.
I would be more concerned if he showed no interest in getting from point A to point B independantly.
If he has a walker, put it away now for a couple of weeks to encourage him to mobilise himself, start putting things slightly out of reach to either side of him to encourage little sidesteps while he's standing at the couch/coffee table etc, and he will probably start taking an interest soon enough. Those little push-along roller/buggy type toys that play music or make noise can be a useful incentive too.
Rarely, a child will develop an aversion to putting weight through his feet and they can become a little sensitized to the feeling on weight, so plenty of barefoot standing on various textured surfaces can help.
Once you've seen the development team, hopefully you'll be reassured that all is well.
As for the HV, that was quite an insensitive and unprofessional comment to make, whatever her own opinion is - that's all it is, an opinion, and she would have been better keeping it to herself.
I hope all goes well with your son, and for you and your wife. Best of luck.

Churchmouse

splishsplash wrote: »

Is he crawling?
It's not the timing so much as the sequence in development that's important. Development in one area may be faster than in others, as another poster said.
Once he's followed a fairly steady path in rolling over, sitting up, going on all fours and crawling on all fours, then pulling up, then I would get a check-up just to be on the safe side, but wouldn't worry too much.
I would be more concerned if he showed no interest in getting from point A to point B independantly.
If he has a walker, put it away now for a couple of weeks to encourage him to mobilise himself, start putting things slightly out of reach to either side of him to encourage little sidesteps while he's standing at the couch/coffee table etc, and he will probably start taking an interest soon enough. Those little push-along roller/buggy type toys that play music or make noise can be a useful incentive too.
Rarely, a child will develop an aversion to putting weight through his feet and they can become a little sensitized to the feeling on weight, so plenty of barefoot standing on various textured surfaces can help.
Once you've seen the development team, hopefully you'll be reassured that all is well.
As for the HV, that was quite an insensitive and unprofessional comment to make, whatever her own opinion is - that's all it is, an opinion, and she would have been better keeping it to herself.
I hope all goes well with your son, and for you and your wife. Best of luck.

So agree with this point. DGS2 is 14 months and will only now accept weight on his feet. Before this, if he was held in a standing position he would *goose step* but not bear any weight on his feet. He crawled very late, but then he could get everywhere he wanted by rolling, so why bother?:D

His father walked at 11 months, my other 3 DSs walked at 9, 10 and 11 months. I apparently walked at 1 year, my DH at just over 2 years. I do not believe for one moment that your wife's depression has made any difference. All babies are different. They get there in their own time. Your son is happy, walking a little later than the average will not impact on his life in years to come:D Best wishes to you all!!!!

EMcG

Just to let you know that our son has been diagnosed with hyperflexibility - he's double jointed in other words. This means he finds it harder to stand up and thus the delay in him walking.

We have been given exercises for him to do and he'll need some minor physiotherapy - but he will walk in time.

My wife seems far happier now and all the staff at the Child Development Centre were great.

Thanks for all your advice and concern.

pickle

Now that a biological cause has been found (which should have been the HV's first point of reference) maybe your wife should remark at the next visit that in future she should not make value judgements and should wait until all biological causes have been excluded before finding a convenient target to attribute blame to.

LilMissEmmylou

i would suggest ur wife try to get another health visitor if possible - that one you currently have sounds terrible I used to have the most wonderful health visitor who was so nice about everything and so tactful, but that was before i moved over to england - now i never hear from them unless they need DD for a checkup. A good health visitor makes a huge difference though *hugs* for your wife

anonymousie

EMcG wrote: »

He jabbers and has about 5 or 6 proper words. He sleeps 12 hours straight through each night, has a good apetite and is generally very happy and has bonded well with us both. Other than constipation and some eczema the only worry is his lack of walking.

If depression affects a baby it normally shows through inactivity, failure to bond and sleep problems. None of which he suffers from - quite the opposite.

After speaking to my mum it appears that neither I nor my 3 siblings were walking before 20 months.

I'm sure there's nothing wrong and this will be confirmed with the specialist tomorrow.

My main worry is the effect on my wife's mental health that this constant worrying and the stupid comments from the health visitor will have.

Bl**dy HV!! You son is well within the normal range for his mobility. You have a FH of latish walking, so he can't be expected to walk early:mad: My DD2 walked at 22 months and is very normal!

HV need to think before they speak really but most are young "slips" of girls that don't even have their own kids.