18 month old son won't walk

EMcG

Hello all,

my lovely 18 month old son isn't walking yet. He can sit up on his knees and pull himself up on furniture. He can take steps if I hold him up and has even kicked a ball around when held. But generally he isn't too happy about being forced to stand.

Tomorrow we are off to a child development centre we have been referred to as our health visitor is concerned. My wife suffered/suffers very badly from despression resulting in a couple of hospital stays and the worry about our son's non-walking is making it worse again.

Our tactless health visitor just told her that her depression may have stunted our son's development. Now my wife feels even worse.

Can anyone who has been through a similar situation offer and advice or experiences?

Thanks

Iom-rf

Can he talk yet?, ie hold a conversation?

Sometimes you find they'll progess at an amazing rate with one thing, but really slow with another.

Depression may well have stunted the little chaps growth though, its common knowledge that if the mother is healthy and happy then the baby is likely to be the same.

luckyme38

I really wouldnt worry if I were you. My first born didnt start walking until he was 21 months and there were no concerns shown by any health visitor then(1992). I basically put it down to the fact that he was lazy...and 16 years later nothing has changed much!!!lol

EMcG

He jabbers and has about 5 or 6 proper words. He sleeps 12 hours straight through each night, has a good apetite and is generally very happy and has bonded well with us both. Other than constipation and some eczema the only worry is his lack of walking.

If depression affects a baby it normally shows through inactivity, failure to bond and sleep problems. None of which he suffers from - quite the opposite.

After speaking to my mum it appears that neither I nor my 3 siblings were walking before 20 months.

I'm sure there's nothing wrong and this will be confirmed with the specialist tomorrow.

My main worry is the effect on my wife's mental health that this constant worrying and the stupid comments from the health visitor will have.

zfrl

EMcG wrote: »

After speaking to my mum it appears that neither I nor my 3 siblings were walking before 20 months.

I think this says it all - children do take after their parents. Hope everything goes OK with the specialist.

[Deleted User]

my eldest walked at 20 months and has a masters degree and is sporty, so don`t worry. Walking is not the easy option for a toddler and some babies like the easy option

bluebell13

My son was 22 months and my daughter 19 months before they walked. Both myself and OH were late-walkers so they didnt have much chance!! For the sake of your wifes mental health I would limit visits/contact with this tactless and insensitive Health visitor. I have never heard of depression stunting growth. My Health visitor said she would not consider referring a child for not walking until they were two.

Hope it goes okay

izoomzoom

my ds1 only started walking when he was 18m old. he had a plastic bike that he got around on so there was no need for him to walk ....

linzz_2

I definately wouldn't worry about walking. Both my sons walked by the time they were a year, but my eldest daughter didn't walk until she was 18 months!

One health visitor I saw made a big thing about our youngest daughter bearing weight on her legs when she was around 9 months and yet the next time I went we saw someone else who didn't think there was a problem, she started walking by 14 months.

Is there another health visitor you could see next time as some are so much more down to earth?!

Good luck and I hope your wife reads all the replys and tries not to be so hard on herself.

frostyspice

No need to worry yet - and very likely no need to worry at all. My elder son walked at 13 months, the younger one point blank refused to even try and we were about to be referred on by the HV if he was still not walking at 20 months. Two weeks before the 20 month 'deadline' he absent-mindedly got up and walked around the living-room with a drinking-cup in his mouth - he didn't even realise he was walking! He didn't look back after that.

WeirdoMagnet

EMcG - I'm sure there is no need for you and your DW to worry. It doesn't sound to me like he has problems - he can kneel, pull himself up, kick a ball and has the desire to do so.

I'm sure not all Health Visitors are the same, but some of the stories I hear are awful and cause alot of unneccessary worry and distress. A friend of mine was scared to tell her HV that as her baby was so hungry she was giving him baby rice at four months, because the 'official' weaning date is six months. She had a tiny frame, and her hubby was huge, so it was no surprise that she had a hungry baby! He was about 13lbs when he was born! A HV told my SIL that she was concerned about her two year old daughters (our niece) speech - apparently she didn't have a very good way with the children, and was a stranger - what did she expect? BTW both are perfectly normal children! :rolleyes:

It was quite interesting to observe our niece, who we don't see that often. She was our BIL/SILs first baby. She was great at sitting, and if she wanted anything, she just pointed and made 'baby noises'. They'd get the desired object and hand it to her. They mentioned that she made little effort to reach or crawl or walk, but I pointed out that there was no motivation for her - they handed her everything she wanted!

All babies develop at different rates - some talk sooner than others, some never crawl and suddenly walk, others crawl for ages. What would be the point of 'age of walking' and 'age of talking' spaces in baby record books if we all did it at the same time?! Your son will turn out just perfect.