debt free in 1200 months!?

annamc75

He might give you £200 a month but what does he cost you monthly? Having another adult in the house who isnt paying 50/50 of everything means that he is costing you. And there is nothing mentally or physically that you have mentioned that prevents him from pulling his weight. The worst thing is that someone someday will actually end up with him as a partner and he will have none of the life skills he needs to be a partner to someone. Instead the lady in his life will inherit a child - temper tantrums and all.

I know that if you were in a position to do everything and pay everything for him you would - but you are not. Time to look after number 1 (at least til the house sells and you have the money).

I know that sounds harsh but the difficult situation is not all of your making but you arent making the best of your options at the moment.

slummymummyof3

If you apply for alliance and leicester account - apply through cash back site and get £50. Try cashbackkings (my £50 became payable in 8 weeks)

bountiful

Thanks - I'm already banking with A&L xx

bountiful

It is easy, from the outside, to say what I 'should' be doing about my son - but at the end of the day, he's family - and there are so many kids out on the street, or really suffering because their families have rejected them in some way. Also, like my shift work - the situation stays the same (at the moment) because there is a pay-off for me - I have company, I learn about things going on in young people's lives, I have a good relationship with my son generally (which isn't to be taken for granted).

My intuition has usually been pretty good about what moves to make and when - this isn't the right time. It will happen, when I am ready - which, as I have said, will probably be springtime next year. My son and I both live in better circumstances than either or us could afford on our own - that's worth considering too.

I have just heard from my sister that MY DAD'S BUNGALOW HAS BEEN SOLD - EXCHANGES DONE - COMPLETION MID-NOVEMBER!

beanielou

Oooh bountiful I am so so pleased for you that your dads bungalow has been sold.
Cant remember if you will get enough tp repay your debts but still great news.
Bitter sweet for you though me thinks.

Seaxwyn

HOORAY!!!!!!!!!! :j:j:j:j:j:j:j:j:j:j:j:j:j:j:j:j

bountiful

Yesterday evening, my son asked me whether - hypothetically - I would be OK with his girlfriend living here for a few months from January. I said, "give me 24 hours to think about it." I have decided to say, "Yes." I have told them they need to pay me £400 every four weeks, because that is half of the rent, water, electricity, phone and council tax - plus a contribution for food. It might be a good thing - because I reckon I am likely to be more successful in moving them out into a place of their own if they are together. If my inheritance comes through, it will all fall into place very nicely

forgot to mention: I went into Lloyds yesterday to open a basic bank account (because I hadn't heard back from Nationwide yet, and it was getting urgent) - clutching my evidence of identity and address - and, guess what?! they refused me because they couldn't agree that my photo driving licence looked like me!!! So - I have forked out another £17.50 to get a new driving licence with new photo.

bountiful

I've bought a sewing machine: I had been browsing the forums on MSE - and came across someone making hampers for Xmas. I followed the links to the celebrations and occasions forum (or something like that) and looked at more craft-making stuff. Came across little black dresses for parties - and recommendations for sewing patterns - and ended up on the Simplicity web-site and ordered an "Easy" paper pattern for a dress. On the way through town on Saturday (washing in lauderette, I had popped down to the bank to deposit the cash my son had given me £300 from his wages) - feeling rich I bought a take-away coffee - and walked back to the launderette. On the way there is a little corner shop that does Singer repairs and stuff - never taken much notice before - but it was open, so I popped in - just enquiring - they had some lovely old machines (and some new ones) - I decided on a Jones basic machine - refurbished - for £49. Now, before someone tells me I could have got one for free on freecyle, please stop! let me enjoy spending the money and trading with a traditional local trader whose business might last a little longer because of my purchase. I realised I couldn't exactly walk home with it, so the man I'm going round before the shop closes next Saturday and he will drop me and the machine home in his van. And that is how I got a sewing machine. I am going to make a little black dress for the work Xmas evening out.

bountiful

I had three lovely days off in a row - Thursday, Friday, Saturday and REALLY enjoyed them. I got out and about by bus and train - had a really long windy coastal footpath walk one day, a walk across fields to visit a friend who lives on a farm on another day, and a beautiful bus ride on the other day to go and visit some other friends. I felt blessed. All enhanced by the fact that my son had been paid and given me the rent - a good feeling:D Now I have 6 days in a row to work - but no sleep-ins this week, so that it is almost a 9-5 week actually:
Monday: 7.15-3.15
Tuesday: 9-5
Wednesday: 10-5
Thursday: 3-10
Friday:10-5
Sat and Sunday: OFF

I think the reason is that the manager is on holiday - and I am on 'house cover' ie covering the office hours.

bountiful

Just withdrew cash for my second week of budgeting with CAP - I have £74 - that's for food, travel, leisure, laundry (two of us) - and I have £20 for the electricity (which is more than I need - but I am building up some reserves for the winter/christmas period. I did stray last week by ordering a sewing pattern on-line for £6.00 - oh, and buying a sewing machine for £50 - oh, dear, and I thought I was doing quite well!:o