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Help - we feel like we've done everything we can, and we're still piling on the debt!
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BlushingRose wrote: »Thanks Scouser,
I know people are trying to help, but I feel very defense myself, and protective of the OH :-(
It's just really hard to know where to start.
You're all giving us loads of help and suggestions, but where to actually begin?!
*sigh*
Hey don't worry. You're not acting different to anyone else in your situation.
Personally I think you need to start by contacting the CCCS. You can go through their website and fill in their debt remedy section and arrange to call them for free impartial advice. They are a registered charity and are pucker.
Briefly you have a few options to you.
Increase income and reduce outgoings so that you earn more than you spend.
A DMP (debt management plan). It's an non binding agreement between you and your creditors, via CCCS, to pay them a reduced amount each month and hopefully get all interest stopped. This will mean the debts take longer to pay off and will you ruin your credit file with defaults meaning obtaining any new credit for 6 years is near on impossible, including remortgaging.
IVA. See here.
Bankruptcy!
But the CCCS will advise you to which they think is most viable to you. You aren't under any obligation to accept any by the way.0 -
Hello
Have you thought of night work in a supermarket? They are always looking for people for this type of work. It pays at least £50 a night so you would only need to commit to 2 nights a week to cover your shortfall. There is also always overtime for when you could manage a bit more. Ofcourse you would need to sleep for some of the day but your days would be free for your job search or to enable you to take any temp work that comes your way. Supermarket work can also help with the grocery spending too as there are one or two perks and staff discount.
Worth a thought!:j Trytryagain FLYLADY - SAYE £700 each month Premium Bonds £713 Mortgage Was £100,000@20/6/08 now zilch 21/4/15:beer: WTL - 52 (I'll do it 4 MUM)0 -
your food budget is reasonably ok, that isnt the problem though is it? the main problem is those fees
how long has he got left in the 6th form? if its another year and a half that
time will soon pass and you will have that money if you can hold out that long, however if he applies to state 6th forms now to transfer at the end of this year to do his A2s you only have a few more months to find.
you cannot afford to keep him there no matter how upset it might make him to change/move, or he gets a job to help with his fees - he is old enough to know the situation and to get a job to help.
sorry if i seem harsh but you cannot carry on the way you are.
at our poorest i fed 4 of us on £10 a week'We're not here for a long time, we're here for a good time0 -
I think there is such a lot of advice on here that you will need to sit down and think for a few days about the best way to approach your stuation. I also think that it ought to be said how much you are supporting your partner and his son, to your credit you are putting the boy's needs as high priority and as a step parent this isn't always an easy thing to do. So think carefully about all the advice and good luck with everything..something which may cheer you up a bit is by reading some of the diaries on here-the old adage is if they can do it so can you.Blackadder: Am I jumping the gun, Baldrick, or are the words 'I have a cunning plan' marching with ill-deserved confidence in the direction of this conversation?
Still lurking around with a hope of some salvation:cool:0 -
hopeless_case wrote: »ok so having read all this you can afford to live but not to send your son /step son to private school.Does his mother know? Could she help out more? He obviously lives with you so the money she pays is this maintenance or school fee money as really if it only for fees she should pay maintenance too. I can understand you not wanting to take him out of his school but you definately need a job to pay for this and still there will be no money for treats living etc. I hope he is clever and appreciates what you are doing.
I think the problems are either the school fees, or the bank loan and credit cards. If we could get rid of one, or the other, then we'd at least break even. Taking him out of 6th form at the moment is not an option though. As I've mentioned before, we've been to other state 6th forms in the area and it's too late in the school year to move him.
His mum is aware of our situation, but isn't made of money herself.Our LBM: Dec 2011. DMP started: Jan 2012. Debt at LBM: £41,568
Oct 2012 = Current debt: £40,548.93
Oct 2013 = Current debt: £39.054.70
DMP Support number 424 - Long haul number 3080 -
southernscouser wrote: »Hey don't worry. You're not acting different to anyone else in your situation.
Personally I think you need to start by contacting the CCCS. You can go through their website and fill in their debt remedy section and arrange to call them for free impartial advice. They are a registered charity and are pucker.
Increase income and reduce outgoings so that you earn more than you spend.
I'm glad to hear I'm not offending people with every post!
Will we need all our paperwork to go through the cccs website? If so, that's something we'll have to get our heads together and do in the week.
increasing income and reducing outgoings is what we've been trying to do up to now. My OH has been been applying to get evening and weekend work, but shops round here seems to want flexibility and he cannot give them that
Someone mentioned child benefit earlier. The Boy is 16 now so surely not something we can get?
Our LBM: Dec 2011. DMP started: Jan 2012. Debt at LBM: £41,568
Oct 2012 = Current debt: £40,548.93
Oct 2013 = Current debt: £39.054.70
DMP Support number 424 - Long haul number 3080 -
shop-to-drop wrote: »Hello
Have you thought of night work in a supermarket? They are always looking for people for this type of work. It pays at least £50 a night so you would only need to commit to 2 nights a week to cover your shortfall. There is also always overtime for when you could manage a bit more. Ofcourse you would need to sleep for some of the day but your days would be free for your job search or to enable you to take any temp work that comes your way. Supermarket work can also help with the grocery spending too as there are one or two perks and staff discount.
Worth a thought!
yep, we've thought on this before, and applied, but no-one seems to want us!Our LBM: Dec 2011. DMP started: Jan 2012. Debt at LBM: £41,568
Oct 2012 = Current debt: £40,548.93
Oct 2013 = Current debt: £39.054.70
DMP Support number 424 - Long haul number 3080 -
You can get child benefit upto the age of 19- in some cases if he is in full time education.Blackadder: Am I jumping the gun, Baldrick, or are the words 'I have a cunning plan' marching with ill-deserved confidence in the direction of this conversation?
Still lurking around with a hope of some salvation:cool:0 -
your food budget is reasonably ok, that isnt the problem though is it? the main problem is those fees
how long has he got left in the 6th form? if its another year and a half that
time will soon pass and you will have that money if you can hold out that long, however if he applies to state 6th forms now to transfer at the end of this year to do his A2s you only have a few more months to find.
you cannot afford to keep him there no matter how upset it might make him to change/move, or he gets a job to help with his fees - he is old enough to know the situation and to get a job to help.
sorry if i seem harsh but you cannot carry on the way you are.
at our poorest i fed 4 of us on £10 a week
I don;t think the fees are the problem, in spite of the fact that it's what people are focusing on.
If we could get rid of the credit card debt and/or the bank loan then we'd been about £400 better off.
Moving him, certainly at this stage, is not an option.Our LBM: Dec 2011. DMP started: Jan 2012. Debt at LBM: £41,568
Oct 2012 = Current debt: £40,548.93
Oct 2013 = Current debt: £39.054.70
DMP Support number 424 - Long haul number 3080 -
boredofbeingathome wrote: »I think there is such a lot of advice on here that you will need to sit down and think for a few days about the best way to approach your stuation. I also think that it ought to be said how much you are supporting your partner and his son, to your credit you are putting the boy's needs as high priority and as a step parent this isn't always an easy thing to do. So think carefully about all the advice and good luck with everything..something which may cheer you up a bit is by reading some of the diaries on here-the old adage is if they can do it so can you.
Thank you, I'm very grateful for this post.
The money issues have only become apparent to us recently (Nov 2007) and most of them had arisen without my knowledge and in the background. I feel, a little, as though I'm being forced into a situation that wasn't of my making - BUT - we are a partnership and plan to sort this out together.Our LBM: Dec 2011. DMP started: Jan 2012. Debt at LBM: £41,568
Oct 2012 = Current debt: £40,548.93
Oct 2013 = Current debt: £39.054.70
DMP Support number 424 - Long haul number 3080
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