We are being evicted, some advice please...... the date has arrived......

blue_monkey_2

Thanks PM, yes we pay it but after we give her the money - because they don;t have the facilities to pay it, that is all I meant. They have not asked for a while, avoiding us I think, but yes I do understand. We cannot stop paying the rent because then they can tell the judge, we will get evicted for non-payment of rent and we have made ourselves homeless so we have to carry on paying, even though we have a date for the bailiff to knock on the door.

most of what is in the houe is ours so yes, we are taking it but I am leaving things - silly things - such as cutlery that is here so as to make a point, if we took out everything we put in then there would be nothing left. LOL.
but seriously, we are looking forward to it being a new start for us.

A few years back my husband was threatened with redundancy and he actually put in for it and we was going to move up north, but with having 2 children my husband can't just leave his job, I have just had to wind my business up and we have to think of the kids. In our younger days when both unhappy in our work we both left, gave our notice and left, even though we had nothing else. You can't do this when you have kids as you don;t get benefit just for leaving and moving, so we are stuck in and around here. But it's OK, life is what it is for a reason. I know that once we get out the other side of this it will be for the right reasons, I have thought about schools, if the kids have to move they have to move, but for now I am keeping them here, at least until my son has finished his IEP and until he has seen the paediatricitian else it means going back to the bottom of the list and we have already been waiting since November, I don't want to start again, once we are 'in the system' and have been seen it will be easier to transfer to another hospital and another doctors.

I am (surprising myself here) taking it all in my stride at the moment. I have to find out about fostering the cats, I keep on putting it off and putting it off but I do know it is inevitable, I have to get some notes up the vets. I doubt they would let us have all 5 if we had a council place anyway so I have to decide which would be OK on their own and what ones I would prefer to have a chance in staying in foster care to come back to me.

So, if we don;t get housed and have to go to a hostel, I have lost a home, money (that we put into this place), all of my pets (of which I have had for 10 years), my business and, if we don't get housed around here eventually, my friends and support. Do you think I should be sending my mum a 'thanks for nothing' card??? it's her birthday next month..... ideas for pressies anyone..... BUT I am still smiling because of all the support I have been given everywhere else and it really does help so much in keeping things into perspective. Thank you.

supersavershal

Hi blue monkey I have just read all your thread and wish you all the luck in the world you have a lot to put up with.
I dont understand why you say you have a support network where you live now, if no one cares for your children except you and you dont get out much and your HV is not much use.Who exactly is supportive to you?
I think it is time to move to pastures new, there is learning support in most schools now as conditions such as aspergers and ADHD are increasingly common.You might even find more support in a larger town with specialist groups set up by surestart etc.
I dont think the council will see having a garden as something to be taken into consideration, they will look at the housing needs only.My cousin has a 14yr old autistic boy and got a 4 bed house so the children could have their own room but was told to look at DLA and mobility allowance for help outside the home.
I sympathise with you but my son is 8 and has no condition (that I know of) but still requires safefty to stop him running into the busy road in front of our house.
You are going to be homeless soon and all that matters is having a roof over your head, It shouldnt matter where it is, I dont think you can afford to stay where you are.You can make a home anywhere and build up a social support network.I dont think the services you describe in your area are exemplary.I live in a small town and work in a large town and both have lots more facilities to allow respite for families of children with autistic spectrum disorders.
Im sorry for being harsh, my thoughts are with you I just think you need to re prioritise.

blue_monkey_2

No, I understand I can do harsh. My support network are my friends that I have here - places I can escape to if I need to but moving to a completely new area I am not going to have this. I know I have explained before but we don't/can't go anywhere because my son attacks other kids. This is why i spend all day on here - it is not through choice! But where ever we go we still won't have the support that a family network usually offers and I don't know what other support is available as I have never asked for it. I can;t really go asking for it now if in 3 weeks time we are living somewhere different so for this moment, things are fine. I don't care where we go, I don't care where we live, I have already said that. The reason for my posting was to make sure I have 'all angles covered' and that I am doing all I can t ensure we get what we are entitled to - and if the law states we should have x points but we don't have them then I want them, as it will make the difference between being housed and being homeless. We needn't be homeless if we had the right amount of points and I need to make sure I am doing all I can to ensure that I have got them. But I do want to stay around here (and I mean that loosely as in the district, 40 mile radius) so I can keep the friends I have because we have nothing else. I am sure they would look after my son if I let them but because he is quite violent to other kids (and to me and I am sure other parents) so is it right I let them when he has to be kept a watch on at all times? Would you like to be looking after a friends child who can, the minute your back it turned, hit your child and hurt them? I sit here saying this with a fat lip where he smacked something into a few days back and it has swollen right up. Would you want a child like this in your house and in your care? Honestly? Well that is why I feel my friends are my support network as they will have me in their house and they will let me son play with their children. Many wouldn't, many don't - which is why he does not make any friends and this is why they call him 'naughty Ryan'. i don't expect people to understand but I do have my reasons and for now, I am happy with my reasons.

At the end of the day - for now - I just want to make sure I get the points I am entitled to - this was why I posted. I know we will be homeless, I've accepted that, I've accepted that homeless will not be around here either, but I don't want to move from the area I am in (district). Where ever we go we still can't get anywhere to live as we can't get past the credit checks and being realistic we have 6 weeks to find somewhere. The only place we can go is further in towards London because of my husbands job and I am not going to do that. He can't just leave his job to move somewhere because our families are carp so while I understand what everyone is saying about moving onto pastures new I can't quite understand where we are expected to go as we will still have the same problems, but without any money as my husband will have no job if he leaves it. I am certainly not moving further into London and if we move out of this area then we are not on the council list anymore, we would lose most of our posints (50 are for local connections - ie. living here for this long, if you move away you lose them) and would not be able to move back, we would not qualify for social housing elsewhere and we can't rent private. I know it is cheaper elsewhere but how do we pay the rent with no money? What if my husband could not find another job? So we have to stay around 'here' - and by 'around here' I am talking about being in the housing district, not in this village. But where else are we supposed to be going? I know everyone means well by saying we should move to pastures new but there is nowhere else to go? Is there? Or am I missing something here?

I am being realistic here and I know what the score is, but really, there is nowhere else to go that would not mean my husband losing his job, and I am only asking for these things with the house to be taken into consideration, in the same way your cousin has been given because her son has autism, if they don't know our needs they can't accomodate them, they already told me this so I have asked for them. I appreciate that the first place we get offered we will take and I have already said that, if it is 'wrong' for us then we can appeal. if we keep on looking and find somewhere to take us private in this time then we can do this, but for now I'll take what is offered as we have nothing else and I have never said I would not.

So, I know what some of you think and I appreciate you have your views, but I think for now we are doing the right thing and we want to stay in the district rather than move somewhere where we have no work, no friends and the like.

mumoftwins

"I have asked they send me a letter to verify the points we are due, hubby is going to speak to the union to see if we will get legal help if they start being difficult - if we are getting it for free I have no hesitation in getting them to send a letter asking them to outline why we have not been given the correct number of points because it might have more weight if coming from them (would they then think we have too much money if we have a solicitor and refuse to house us on this basis? do people get legal help for free otherwise? Just a thought)"

Hi BM, depending on your income you can get Legal Aid to help with this. In my case I have full Legal Aid but you may have to pay something towards it. My solicitor is brilliant and was recommended by an MSE'r on my thread whose friend is a Judge dealing with mental health and homelessnessso she knows the right solicitors! If you would like their details feel free to pm me xx

Mollymop5

Hi Blue _Monkey.I think your doing really well at holding things together and I understand you wanting to stay in the area you are in.Friend and their understanding are important especially when you have children no matter how they behave.When my ds was little he had a friend who has ADHD.We often had him round to play and that was very hard work.He was like a tornado, toys etc flying everywhere.My son took slaps to the head, pushes and nips on many occasion.After his friend had gone he'd happily tidy away his toys saying " he didn't mean to make a mess its just his head makes him do things really quick and doesn't give him time to think.I know he will say sorry at school tomorrow".I often though that it would be best not to have him back to play ( for an easy life) but my ds would have none of it.I was really proud of him especially when his friends mum came up to us and told us just how much it meant to her that her son could have friends who accepted him as he was.
I wish you well and hope you're given the points you deserve.

blue_monkey_2

Thank you MM, this is how my friends see my son too so it was really nice to have someone else explain from the other side.

I called the council this morning to find out if I was awarded any medical points yesterday and apparently, if I have been then a letter will be sent out. If I haven't then I guess I am still just waiting and not knowing as they refused to tell me on the phone. I'll let you know if and whan I get a letter.

I had a dream last night that we had been offered a house in the village in the next road down, I was so excited I forgot to ask where we got the keys from so I called them back to find out and she said hold on, I'll find out, put me on hold and.......... the kids woke me up. Doh!! Now I'll never know. LOL!!

mini_huny_money

hya ....have been following your thread and have been dipping in and out of mum of twins thread .....nothing I can say or do to help but I really hope that you get the same help and encouragemwnt that the other lady is getting

mini_huny_money

blue_monkey wrote: »

Thank you MM, this is how my friends see my son too so it was really nice to have someone else explain from the other side.

I called the council this morning to find out if I was awarded any medical points yesterday and apparently, if I have been then a letter will be sent out. If I haven't then I guess I am still just waiting and not knowing as they refused to tell me on the phone. I'll let you know if and whan I get a letter.

I had a dream last night that we had been offered a house in the village in the next road down, I was so excited I forgot to ask where we got the keys from so I called them back to find out and she said hold on, I'll find out, put me on hold and.......... the kids woke me up. Doh!! Now I'll never know. LOL!!

just read your sig..... *shouldve done that before I posted ,,,,,perhaps saving for florida in 2009 doesnt help.......I wish I couldve taken my children there

blue_monkey_2

Hi MHM,

Clearly that not going to happen now as my little business that was going to bring in the money we would have used for spending money has just closed. We never touch the business money as it is for the business and I've not really earned in previous years, this was going to be the first year I would have earned anything through being self employed. We started OK and then had to slow down as my son needed so much time and attention. The money that I have earned this year now has to be spent on storage costs for one year and I am hoping in that time we will be sorted enough to be able to know where 2009 is going. I spent this morning packing all my stock into boxes as they are going into storage next week (Out of sight, out of mind?), it is easy to keep on putting things off but last night I realised there is something like 2 weeks and then my mum is going to court for the order, if they give us something stupid like a week to get out then I am not ready. I don't know what happens then, am I never allowed back into the family home again?

It's just silly things like parking the car, having car insurance I've been trying to find homes for the cats but all the centres say rehoming only so I have to give my cats up too. This morning has been a time for contemplation I guess and right now I feel a bit numb having had the first people round for viewing. I don't know if I feel happy, sad, angry or pleased that this is another hurdle to cross that makes us closer as a family.

I should also update my sig to say put on 6lb over Xmas (the shame)..... LOL....

But obviously we won't be going now but who knows what will happen. It was Clubcard Vouchers we was saving for the holiday - the same as last time we went, have been for a long time but we have cut so far back on shopping now that we don't even use the vouchers they have to offer and even gave the wine we had bought previously with vouchers that had been sitting in our cupboard to people for Xmas as we need to save every penny. We also have to use everything in the cupboards so that we don't have to throw food away or give it away as that is a waste of money too. I am pleased with myself if I am honest as I managed to spend just £140 last month on shopping for all of us so it is lessons all round for all of us right now.

Never mind, I will update it and then I don't have to think about it - I wasn't even thinking about it tbh, I forgot the sig was there in all honesty and I just post. Funny you can feel all warm and secure but how life can change and the things you can lose in the space of a few months, isn't it?

blue_monkey_2

While I am on here. I got my note from the council about my son's points. He has been given 15, and they did not update the points for being on a 2 month notice or for not having enough money to secure our own tenancy. So, we have 88 - with the other points it would only have been 113 anyway so 7 off the amount for being housed. Surprise surprise really.

I have just had the EA round and she said she will keep her ears open for news on anything coming up but that means we have to find 2.5k in a months and a halfs deposit and a months rent - plus more if they think they needs it as we are unsecure. Hubby has not earned much this month as there has been no overtime and his wage this month will probably cover a months private rent and electric bill and we have no money for a deposit anyway.

I have been doing OK but today I feel a bit down, I think because of the business side and having a viewing in, it has made everything more real, I feel on the edge of breaking down but don't want to in front of the kids, my throat hurts from holding everything in and I have a pain in my side, I've been up since 7am tidying but it can't get any tidier as I am so embarrassed to have all these local people traipsing through the house dicussing what might be dirty and then having them talking about it down the school gates and the like. My husband spends all his time moaning about the council washing their hands of us and there is no way they can possibly put us all in a hostel and yesterday I told him that he can go off and rent a room elsewhere then as the kids and I have no other choices. I am not sleeping more than a few hours a night and everything just seems bluegh.

I am really very sorry, I am just having a moan, it is good to have an outlet as I don't have anything else so please accept my apologies.

But, I've not heard a thing from my local counciller. On Monday afternoon I am going to try and contact social services and see if I can get any help from them if I am going to be moving soon. I am not sure what happens now. I guess that come 3rd Feb I am going to have to ring the homeless people and ask as the council don't seem that interested in helping.

Right, smiling face on. DD has a party to get to.

Thanks for listening. xx