Money Moral Dilemma: What should I do with the inherited money that I feel guilty about spending?

MSE_Kelvin

This week's MoneySaver who wants advice asks..

I've recently inherited some money. It's enough to buy a new car, something I do need. But I feel too guilty to spend it - I would much rather have the person I inherited it from still here, and it breaks my heart even thinking about spending it, as doing so would almost feel like losing them again. Any suggestions on what I should do would be gratefully received... 

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El_Torro

Spend it anyway. Very easy to say, perhaps not so easy to do.

One option could be to invest or save the money, only spending the interest or investment gains. I don't know if that would make the expenditure more palatable, maybe it will.

tacpot12

While you are still grieving, not making any large purchases is a good idea. As time passes, you may or may not feel different about buying a car. I'm sure your loved one would want you to get some enjoyment out of any inheritance they were able to pass onto you. Whenever I had a windfall, I always tried to save the majority of it, but I was always careful to make sure I spent a bit of it on something fun. There's no need to spend it immediately. You could put into a savings account to get some interest on it while you think about what to do.

Florenceem

I was the same with money inherited from my dad. I eventually bought a sewing machine with some of the money but struggled to use it as I wanted my dad not the machine.

Mike_from_Croydon

I suggest, think about what the person who left it to you would want you to do. I doubt they would want you to feel guilty.

silvercar

Spend some of it on a tribute to the deceased and the rest on whatever you need. Your loved one left you the money because they wanted you to have it.

spikyd

Buy the car, but also buy a personalised number plate that will remind you of that person, so every day you drive that car (and any future cars) you'll remember them

Bookhaven

Please don't feel guilty. They left you an inheritance because they love you, and wanted you to have something tangible to remember them by. Think how happy they must have been to have the opportunity to be able to do that, and then honour that gift by using it however you see fit. But give yourself time to grieve - the inheritance will be there waiting for you when you feel ready to spend it.

keithyno.1

You were obviously close to the deceased. I'm sure they wanted the very best for you when they made their will and left you this inheritance, so if it enables you to buy a new car which you say you need, well all well and good - go ahead and get it bought. I'm sure they'd be pleased you're spending it on something you need which will make your life easier and more comfortable, if they were still with you.

If it would make you feel better, you could also make a donation to a charity the deceased supported at the same time.

CapeTown

Put the money in an ISA or something similar until you feel ready. You have been left money which is lovely. People die. It is a fact of life and the fact that you have happy memories of this person is all the more special.

Ed264

Give yourself time to heal. My nan left me some money and I bought a new car, and I've still got it 21 years on, with over 325,000 miles. It's treasured, everyone tells me I should get a new car now, but I won't.

If you don't want to spend it yet, put it in an investment ISA.