How do you "let go" of your working life?

Kismet_Hardy

Nebulous2 said:

I've written quite a bit about struggling to let go. I retired as a reaction to something, and because my financial ducks had aligned so I could afford to, but quickly conclude I wasn't ready and took a part-time job. 

That has rumbled along longer than I expected, but I think I'm now ready to try again. 

I don't see it as missing my work family either. I've had several jobs where the people around me were meaningful to me, we had occasional work nights out which were enjoyable, but I am not very good at keeping up once I'm no longer in regular contact. 

Several of us retirees from my last job loosely keep in touch, occasionally plan a meeting, but with busy lives and a geographic spread its difficult to get a date that suits. We manage it roughly twice a year. 

I'd say the financial prep is only part of it. You need to have a plan for your post-work life. Expect a honeymoon period, then the dissatisfaction can set in. The adage about retiring to something, rather than from something is very real.

I'm also convinced that a lot of retirees lose confidence, and narrow their horizons, ahead of any decline in their abilities. I went to France last September and couldn't believe how anxious people were in the queue for the ferry. The guy next to me said "Aren't you worried?" I said "No I've been  before." He said he had as well, then after discussing it I discovered he had done some bigger trips than I had. "But I've never felt like this before." he said. 

It starts with anxiety like that about more adventurous trips, and over a period of time people end up going no further than the local shops. 

I'm sure that also contributes to the reduction in spending that many retirees go through. I'm convinced many people over-estimate the 'how much do we need' figure, hold on longer than they need to to get a bigger cushion, and then have a narrow gap between stopping and withdrawing. 

I don't know how we can stop that shrinking of horizons, but I am determined that it isn't going to be me.

That has to be tempered with realism as well. None of us want to be that 90 year old, unfit to drive, who ends up going the wrong way down a motorway, putting themselves and others at risk.  

Thank you. I agree with all of this. 

Kismet_Hardy

So, I have a plan of sorts. My husband and I have our annual meeting with our IFA in a couple of weeks. (He is probably reading this, recognising who I am 😘). I know that he will say it is all okay, but I want to hear it again.

I have work booked until the end of the financial year and I'm fairly sure that I shall be retiring from one of my roles at that point. The need to keep updated is less acute with the other role and I shall continue to take a bit of work here and there should I be so inclined and it continues to be offered.

I have a very long list of things I want to do in the house, the garden and creatively. I'm going to pick up swimming again, investigate our family trees....lots of possibilities.

I'll come back to this thread in a few months time to let you know how I've got on. Thank you again.   

twopenny

You know that the library had Ancestory free to use?

The fact that you only get an hour is fine because once I get stuck in I could be there all day

kimwp

katejo said:

LHW99 said:

katejo said:

SarahB16 said:

katejo said:

SarahB16 said:

katejo said:

sussieclark said:

A very interesting discussion. I have same problem, I am salaried at 69yrs. I live alone and it is the loss of my "work family" and having company that I'm not looking forward to.
Im a community worker and now struggling with mobility that has pushed my decision to retire.

I am 62 now, single  and have just reduced to working 3 days a week. I am also concerned about losing the 'work family'. We have just been offered a VR but I am not going with it for 2 reasons. 1. The payout would be based on my current much lower 3 day a week salary even though I have only just reduced hours 2. I would be completely blocked from any work, even a few casual hours, for the same employer for 2 full years. I want to stay on and do a few casual hours (to cover colleagues' leave). 

Are you sure that's correct? My understanding is your 3-day week would be pro-rated as though it was full time but somebody more knowledgeable than me can hopefully clarify?  

Personally at 62 with the offer of VR (that normally means you can take your pension without the actuarial reduction) I'd be snapping their hands off if I were in your shoes.  

I know people talk about their 'work family' but I really think it's good to have that balance of friends from outside of work too.  Perhaps consider widening your circle of friends by joining local groups near to you.  

I specifically asked about the VR and was told that it would be 8 months salary at my current rate of pay, not the full time rate.  I do already have friends and belong to a small number of groups but have never found it easy to extend activities beyond the group. I am not sure what you mean by the actuarial reduction. I won't get the full pension unless I continue paying in  until 2029. I don't plan to wait that long but I am not quite ready for an abrupt stop in January 2026. 

Sorry I misunderstood, I was referring to your pension being based on the full time equivalent salary (I wasn't meaning your VR payout). 

Re the actuarial reduction, let's just say your normal retirement age is 67 and you are now 62 and taking your pension now.  Normally that would mean a 5-year actuarial reduction but I thought if you had been made redundant and over the age of 55 (currently) then you could take the pension you have accrued to date without the 5 year actuarial reduction because you have taken redundancy.  

Like I said I'm not 100% sure on the above but someone more knowledgeable will clarify this.  If you can then if I were in your shoes I'd taken the VR, take the pension at 62 and get a little part time job (perhaps in a nearby shop or B&Q, garden centre, etc). 

Yes I know that the pension would be based on the full time salary. I am not quite ready to make a sudden stop and my reason for casual hours was to maintain contact with colleagues and still use knowledge acquired on the job. I am not really interested in alternative part time work. 

If you took VR and left, with pension, could you then be able to work for the company as a consultant on an ad hoc (self-employed?) basis? 

Perhaps after having a break of x weeks before doing any work?

No not at all! One of the rules/conditions of their VR is that I would not be allowed to work for the same employer for 2 full years. That's one of the two reasons which stopped me going for it. 

A friend took vr under those conditions and was able to continue consulting for the company by being employed through a third party. It could be advantageous for your company to do this if they wanted ad-hoc holiday cover.

kimwp

I'll be in a position to retire early if I live frugally for the rest of my life in about four years. But I'll want more of an annual buffer, money in case of needing or wanting to move, in case of this, or that. The problem with thinking a bit more would be a good idea when you have enough, is when does it stop.

It sounds like your job isn't really 6-8 days a month, but more if you are having to do all this other stuff- prep, keeping up to date etc. And it's also about how much it limits you and how much you enjoy it. If you enjoy it and wouldn't be going away for long periods is a different kettle of fish to not enjoying it or it restricting you from being able to head somewhere for two weeks on a whim.  There's something lovely about being able to everything at your own pace and not trying to squeeze everything in.

MarzipanCrumble

I know 2 people in late 60's early 70's doing a degree - one in History, other in creative writing.  They both find it stimulating being around the much younger students who have a different perspective.
I joined my local u3a which is cheap and offers over 45 groups with which you can participate - anyting from art appreciation to languages, to improv, to change transition.
Worth checking out
https://www.u3a.org.uk/

bjorn_toby_wilde

MarzipanCrumble said:

I know 2 people in late 60's early 70's doing a degree - one in History, other in creative writing.  They both find it stimulating being around the much younger students who have a different perspective.
I joined my local u3a which is cheap and offers over 45 groups with which you can participate - anyting from art appreciation to languages, to improv, to change transition.
Worth checking out
https://www.u3a.org.uk/

I'm not in U3A myself (too much other stuff to do in retirement - can't fit it in between the walking, cycling, woodcarving, gardening and DIY  ) but a few friends are and they recommend it.  Our local U3A has groups for art, local history, archaeology and it also has genealogy since you mention that as an interest.

Ibrahim5

I joined the U3A expecting it to be like a proper university. The first meeting I went to was a pub lunch. After the meal and pint I expected we would continue to drink throughout the afternoon, and evening, putting the world to right and stagger home in the early hours. Nobody even had an extra pint and everyone had gone home by 2pm.

MeteredOut

leosayer said:

My own way of "letting go" of work (as a Project Manager) was to treat retirement planning as a long-term project which felt like a second job to me. It helped that my field of expertise was Investment Management so I already had direct experience of many relevant aspects.

I never really wrote it down before but if I had done so, my Project Terms of Reference would have read something like the below. It's all a bit scientific and formal but without SMART objectives that everyone signs up to, project struggle.

Ironically, our retirement is probably the only project I ever delivered that was under budget (thanks to redundancy payments and good investment performance) and delivered early (we stopped at 54) although of course, the project continues for the rest of our lives.

Objectives

• By the age of 57, remove the constraints on our time associated with working for a salary to allow more time for things we enjoy like travel, reading, music, exercise, and spending time with family and friends
• Remain living in our current house
• Enjoy a comfortable standard of living for the rest of our lives

Assumptions

• No material impact to our plans from changes to the tax, savings and pension regime
• Paid financial advise is not required
• Long term investment performance profile resembled historic

Risks (that need managing)

• Job loss curtails our ability to save
• Material life change (eg. medical issue) require change of plans
• Sequence risk
• Sustained period of high inflation
• Lack of financial advice give rise to a costly mistake

Please tell us you also create a GANTT chart plotting out your path to retirement

ali_bear

Sorry but - pensioners hobby club