when do you stop buying birthday presents for neices or nephews?

redballoon_2

Hi all, I hope this is in the right place.

I have two nephews and one neice, ages 12, 14 and 18.

I have no problem with buying birthday presents for the younger ones but i feel now is the time to stop buying for the 18 year old, as they have a job and are earning.

My aunts and uncles stopped buying for me when I was 18 and I was completly ok about it.

My newphew is 19 in a few weeks and want some advice on how i go about this. surley there must be a stopping point as otherwise we will keep on buyin for him in his 20's and beyond. The trouble is we buy for the younger ones and i am worried we will be seen as being a scrooge. (we dont get on with the mother of the neice and nephews).

I know its not the point but they dont buy for us for our birthdays and at christmas they only have to buy two presents, where as we have to buy five.

pboae

It's a pity he's already 18, when I had this I made a special effort for their 21st and told them to make the most of it because they wouldn't be getting anymore now they were adults.

redballoon_2

we made a big deal of the 18th birthday and we would buy for the special birthdays after that.

thatgirlsam

i will never stop buying for my neice and nephew! i loooooove them (not saying you don't btw)

Spendless

I've been wondering about this recently as we have a neice approaching 17. I think what I'm going to suggest is that we will buy till she's 21. She is likely to go to uni so we will give her a gift during her student days and then will stop after that. On the opposite side of the family my neice and nephew are similar in age to my kids so everyone will stop within a year or two of each other.

handbagqueen

I was thinking about this recently too as I have 8 nephews and nieces all different ages and I can't imagine having to buy presents for them all forever- esp if I'm to have my own kids soon! I think 18 is a reasonable time to stop- I didn't really get much from the age of 16, only for 18th and 21st birthday so I don't see anything wrong in stopping! Just let them know in a nice way that this is it now until they're 21.

Allison

We stop at 18 but always get them something for their 21st.

Becles

Make sure the person knows you are not going to buy them a present anymore.

My parents and my aunt & uncle made an arrangement when all the children were little that they would buy the children gifts and buy the adults a token box of biccys or something. The childrens gifts would stop after their 18th birthday.

Nobody told me though! They lived away so we always travelled over for a meal with them on New Years Day and swopped presents then. On the Christmas after my 18th, my cousins and my brother had gifts, the adults got their token biccys, and I got nothing! I felt upset and it would have been better if someone told me in advance I wasn't going to get something because I'd reached 18.

floss2

We stop at 21 - Birthday pressie until then is always Waterstones voucher of value equivalent to age eg £19, £20 etc (DF started it ages ago!). Then it will be a "keepie" pressie for 21st.

Christmas is the same - pressies til 21.

ameliarate

I stop buying when they are 18, I have told all my friends and family about this in advance. We all get together at Christmas as a family so I do buy them " a little something" then but birthdays it is a card only. If you feel you might be too late to stop now as he is about to be 19, stop at 21 and make sure everyone involved knows.

TITEASCRAMP

My neice was 19 in October and I put some money in her card (as she always wants money instead of prezzies.
I had intended stopping at 18 but thought oh well one last time.
I had taken it round for her the day before and was actually a little miffed that she hadn't rang and said thankyou. I actually wished I had of stopped at 18.
Anyway come christmas I didnt buy anything. The way I see it is she is an adult now working, so it ends.