The holy grail of university education.

[Deleted User]

Sometimes not that much experience.. i had a BSc, MSc and 2 years research experience when I was asked to run a lecture, workshop and organise some coursework.

I guess I was one of 3 people at the university with enough expertise to run it.. made me an expert I suppose

My little brother is soon to trump me in the academic stakes.. he'll be our families first Dr (not medical though)

Damn outsourcing!

poet123

There is a difference between encouraging your child to achieve their potential and issuing dogmatic statements.

Unless I am very wrong very few peple actually aspire to be a bin man,it is something they drift into perhaps because of circumstance/lack of suport/opportunity etc. It is a very worthwhile job,but not one I would want to do, nor any of my kids.

I do not pressure my kids at all.quite the reverse actually. I believe we are in an country where kids are over tested from too young an age and that in itself is counter productive and alienates lots of kids from education.

if my kids were clearly not academic I would encourge thm to work in a field which utilises their strengthsand support them in their choices. My point was that given that they are academic,and have seen first hand (from my husband and myself)that an education opens lots of career doors which lead to well paid jobs,I believe it is my duty to foster that, and support them whilst they try to achieve their potential.

Too many parents cop out by saying they don't support their kids to encourage independence.....that is good to a degree, but support/help from a parent should be the right of every child.

If parents are too selfish to bother with this then perhaps they should never have had kids. If you genuinely cant afford to financially support your kids whilst they get educated beyond 16 that is a very different matter,but be honest and admit if you selfishly want to spend your salary on things other than the family, and don't hide behind the "independence" card.

Hapless_2

My point was that given that they are academic,

And my point is, even some of the most academically able children do not always want to go to university.

but be honest and admit if you selfishly want to spend your salary on things other than the family

Whether I have a salary or no is regardless.
Once someone reaches 18 they are no longer a child, they are legally an adult and therefore no longer dependant on me. I will support my child financially until their 18th birthday and become an adult. If the government want people to continue to financially support their children through education then they age of legal adulthood should be raised.
Everything I have done, I have done on my own. it has made me determined thay my children should be as independant as possible. I will always be there for moral and emotional support, that sort of help never ends. Financial? Sorry, I would have spent 18 years paying for everything for them in that respect once they are of age they are on their own. No loans, no bank of Mum and Dad, no covering missed mortgage payments, no deposit for the first house or flat.

LandyAndy

Riq wrote: »

Uni education was the holy grail FOR ME. None of my family had been to uni before so I was the first and still only person to have a degree in my family (until June when my sister graduates!! grrr! )

But it is more than an academic education it is a brilliant social education too. You meet so many people from all over the country. I miss it like mad as it was the best 3 years of my life.

A point often missed by the 'you don't need a degree to get a good job' brigade of non graduates.

SmileBeHappy

I go to uni, i have always planned to go to uni... most people here do... its normal.

I need to go for my course, it is just a requirment, and so i go, for me it is a meanss to an end, the money is a lot, but still, its quite good fun.

No point going if your not needing it... I suspect i would have gone anyway though, have a fun 3years

mcwarre

People,

It is not just 'Uni' as a choice. Ask these questions, in ascending order of importance, as I would when sifting CVs:

What class of degree did you get?
What is it in?
Where did you get it from?

For example:

I have a BSc 2:1 degree. OK
It is in Engineering Management. Suited for engineering (perhaps)
It is from Lincoln University. Oh well.

A trade is an excellent grounding. I did a three year apprenticeship full time which was hard work (not the modern rubbish). I then went to University full time and worked (an Engineering degree - paid by employer through a rigorous selection process). I then worked full time and did a part time degree. Just because you have a 2:1 in Basket Weaving from <insert dodgy University> doesn't mean that you are going to get a high paid or good job which is what many people believe in. You'll notice the term 'Work' in there quite a bit. A novelty for some perhaps?

Plumbing, Electrician and other genuine skilled trades always have work. Do Social Scientists?

That's my tuppence worth

BettiePage

Hapless wrote: »

It's a lot more taxing that way as you have to study yourself, discipline yourself and work it around family/work etc.

I too have to do that and by doing my degree at university, not an OU course.

poet123

Hapless wrote: »

And my point is, even some of the most academically able children do not always want to go to university.



Whether I have a salary or no is regardless.
Once someone reaches 18 they are no longer a child, they are legally an adult and therefore no longer dependant on me. I will support my child financially until their 18th birthday and become an adult. If the government want people to continue to financially support their children through education then they age of legal adulthood should be raised.
Everything I have done, I have done on my own. it has made me determined thay my children should be as independant as possible. I will always be there for moral and emotional support, that sort of help never ends. Financial? Sorry, I would have spent 18 years paying for everything for them in that respect once they are of age they are on their own. No loans, no bank of Mum and Dad, no covering missed mortgage payments, no deposit for the first house or flat.

Of course some academically able kids do not want to go to uni,and I would never force one of mine to go(who can force an 18 yr old to do something they don't want to do today?).Equally, some academic kids do want to go to Uni and are held back by selfish parents who spend their cash on drinking,smoking etc in quantities that proclude them giivng financial help to their kids when they could..........

The statement "everything I have done I have done on my own " is very telling, and in part, obviously contributes to the way you view your parental role. I had help from my parents when I needed it,my kids will get help when they need it.....not as the bank of mum and dad,not to cover the irresponsibility of missed mortgage payments when money was spent on other less essential items,but to help them fund an education which will set them up for life.

As has beeen sid if you have a child going to Uni your income is AUTOMATICALLY TAKEN INTO ACCOUNT so if have told your child all which you have covered in previous posts, there is no way most kids would even think of going to Uni and have to endure you fight a court case over their support.

You are therefore disadvantaging your child from the outset,why bother having kids if you could help them but clearly dont want/intend to. A parent is for life not just for 18 yrs,and that includes financial help if and when NEEDED, in my book at least. If you can afford it without huge sacrifices......maybe you can't afford it and your viewpoint is based on this factor,if so these comments do not apply. Only you know which camp you fall into.

My parents gave me a small amount of financial help when I first got married,they had the money and would rather see it spent in their lifetime than leave it behind and not see the benefits to their kids. I am of the same mind. Being so dogmatic tht you would never help your kids financially must stem from the way you were treated,but you don't have to follow the same pattern.......and you should never say never,who knows what fiscal problems lie around the corner for your kids,would you want them to hide issues from you because they know your attitude to this? I find it very sad.

Hereward

Hapless wrote: »

Once someone reaches 18 they are no longer a child, they are legally an adult and therefore no longer dependant on me. I will support my child financially until their 18th birthday and become an adult.

Actually they are not legal Adults until 21, but most adult privileges are given at 18. It just happens that childhood privileges (being dependant on parents for example) are not taken away until 21; therefore if you children need any financial assistance the State will look to you first to help provide it, unless the moved out by their own volition when they turned 18.

TITEASCRAMP

Hereward wrote: »

Actually they are not legal Adults until 21, but most adult privileges are given at 18. It just happens that childhood privileges (being dependant on parents for example) are not taken away until 21; therefore if you children need any financial assistance the State will look to you first to help provide it, unless the moved out by their own volition when they turned 18.

Where did you get 21 from. I thought it was 18 too