Kids on social media

strawb_shortcake

Exodi said:

strawb_shortcake said:

however if I was that adamant that my children should not appear on social media and my MiL behaved like that, they probate wouldn't see my children for awhile

So as well as cutting off your MIL, what of the partner?

Get with the program or get out as well?

sheramber said:

People don’t need to walk into a school to find a child. They can hang about outside to wait for them to come out. 

Then follow them home and find out the address. 

Name could have been shown on social media.

Birthday pictures give away date of birth.

Now that information can be used for identity theft. 

Don’t underestimate fraudsters or predators. 

Pictures can be copied and used for child pornography. 

It doesn’t matter whether it happens a lot or not, once is one  too many. 

You can follow anyone home to find their address, whether they post pictures on social media isn't really of any relevance.

Likewise I'm not clear on the part about someones name and birthday allowing you to commit identify theft? Especially on a baby/child - what's the goal? Presumably not credit applications? Personally, I'm not sure what I could achieve knowing my friends or work colleagues names and birthdays?

As to the final point "It doesn’t matter whether it happens a lot or not, once is one too many." this is why I feel that in reality this is closer to irrational paranoia rather real risk mitigation. You could ride this slippery slope, wrapping your kids in cotton wool and concluding they shouldn't be allowed in cars, or on playground equipment, etc because of the infinitesimally small chance of something happening - "It doesn’t matter whether it happens a lot or not, once is one too many."

In reality, my Facebook page is flooded with people posting pictures of their kids on a near daily basis (perhaps it's my age - I'm in my thirties so every one seems to be having them at the same time).

Separate to this whole topic, I don't think we should encourage intransigence, disregard our partners views or nonchalantly advocate cutting out grandparents from their grandchilds lives...

No, I did say really both partners need to be on the same page, but if my MiL ignored my wishes in safeguarding my children and behaved as the OP's MiL did then I'd happily not involve them in mine or my children's lives. I have no doubt my OH would respond in exactly the same manner. 

For the parents, well they have to compromise on this and many other matters regarding their children's upbringing. 

I don't have a MiL and my children have never known a paternal grandmother, they do have a grandfather on that side but as he chooses not to be active in their lives, perhaps it seems easier to stop contact. 

Ideally the Grandmother would have respected the OP's decision and removed all photos from SM. Their response is selfish and immature so a rational discussion may be beyond them.

Dogsarethebest2025

strawb_shortcake said:

Exodi said:

strawb_shortcake said:

however if I was that adamant that my children should not appear on social media and my MiL behaved like that, they probate wouldn't see my children for awhile

So as well as cutting off your MIL, what of the partner?

Get with the program or get out as well?

sheramber said:

People don’t need to walk into a school to find a child. They can hang about outside to wait for them to come out. 

Then follow them home and find out the address. 

Name could have been shown on social media.

Birthday pictures give away date of birth.

Now that information can be used for identity theft. 

Don’t underestimate fraudsters or predators. 

Pictures can be copied and used for child pornography. 

It doesn’t matter whether it happens a lot or not, once is one  too many. 

You can follow anyone home to find their address, whether they post pictures on social media isn't really of any relevance.

Likewise I'm not clear on the part about someones name and birthday allowing you to commit identify theft? Especially on a baby/child - what's the goal? Presumably not credit applications? Personally, I'm not sure what I could achieve knowing my friends or work colleagues names and birthdays?

As to the final point "It doesn’t matter whether it happens a lot or not, once is one too many." this is why I feel that in reality this is closer to irrational paranoia rather real risk mitigation. You could ride this slippery slope, wrapping your kids in cotton wool and concluding they shouldn't be allowed in cars, or on playground equipment, etc because of the infinitesimally small chance of something happening - "It doesn’t matter whether it happens a lot or not, once is one too many."

In reality, my Facebook page is flooded with people posting pictures of their kids on a near daily basis (perhaps it's my age - I'm in my thirties so every one seems to be having them at the same time).

Separate to this whole topic, I don't think we should encourage intransigence, disregard our partners views or nonchalantly advocate cutting out grandparents from their grandchilds lives...

No, I did say really both partners need to be on the same page, but if my MiL ignored my wishes in safeguarding my children and behaved as the OP's MiL did then I'd happily not involve them in mine or my children's lives. I have no doubt my OH would respond in exactly the same manner. 

For the parents, well they have to compromise on this and many other matters regarding their children's upbringing. 

I don't have a MiL and my children have never known a paternal grandmother, they do have a grandfather on that side but as he chooses not to be active in their lives, perhaps it seems easier to stop contact. 

Ideally the Grandmother would have respected the OP's decision and removed all photos from SM. Their response is selfish and immature so a rational discussion may be beyond them.

Ps im new to this page so please bare with me, just in case I didn’t respond to the correct person

so At this point I just want to clarify. I am not a closed minded person in any way. I welcome opinions, concerns and thoughts from family about my kids or anything really. 

I read up on the safety issue on social media. A few of my friends put an emoji over their kids faces before uploading and I also wondered why. 

Whilst I am no expert in the matter, I am a cautious person and if I can protect my kids I will, even when it comes to social media. 

On one hand I’m like yeah it’s a one in a million type of thing that my kids could be exposed to the dangers but on the other hand, is it worth a few pics on Facebook? To show family who live down the road? Isn’t that what WhatsApp is for? To share pics with family… 

my partner isn’t bothered. Literally I cannot explain this enough. He just said he wants to be kept out of it. No one else is bothered in the family just my MIL. 

I didn’t message her directly asking her not to post pics of my kids. I politely sent a message to my partners family group chat that we have , attaching some new photos. 

She didn’t respond and then I notice I can no longer tag her in some video on Facebook. Why? Because I got blocked. So that she can continue doing whatever she wants without my knowledge. 

I would have appreciated a phone call to discuss, like I said, I’m open to opinions from family but to go ahead and block me? Very hurtful and extreme reaction. Like she doesn’t even care about the dangers but is more concerned about the 2 likes she won’t get from her sisters down the road. 

To answer the question what about my Partner … he doesn’t use social media really so he never posts anything. His mum is talking to him normally like nothing happened but is silent with me. She does this sort of thing. She’ll sweep it under the rug in a few weeks. 

Exodi

Dogsarethebest2025 said:
I read up on the safety issue on social media.

I don't want to drown this thread in my views especially as I do understand the reasoning behind it, however irrational I feel it is, but I would add to this point that social media can also lead mothers to believe vaccines cause autism and that covid wasn't real.

I'd be careful of falling into an echo chamber - social media thrives by showing you things you that you engage with, which is most commonly things that align with your views.

It's why two sides of a debate can both strongly feel their side is 'right' - because everything they see tells them it is.

Dogsarethebest2025

Exodi said:

Dogsarethebest2025 said:
I read up on the safety issue on social media.

I don't want to drown this thread in my views especially as I do understand the reasoning behind it, however irrational I feel it is, but I would add to this point that social media can also lead mothers to believe vaccines cause autism and that covid wasn't real.

I'd be careful of falling into an echo chamber - social media thrives by showing you things you that you engage with, which is most commonly things that align with your views.

It's why two sides of a debate can both strongly feel their side is 'right' - because everything they see tells them it is.

Thank you for your opinion. I appreciate it.