Mum keep sending money to mail fraudsters-any ideas?

MissEyre

With the unwanted 'you've won!' letters, just wanted to let you know that there are several threads over on the 'Warnings and Scams' boards, with people who have had very similar experiences with their parents and these awful companies-some of them have actually suceeded in getting the letters reduced dramatically, and some have even got money back from the companies! Good luck x

Benny24

How about asking your local neighbourhood police officer to have a word with your mum? The officer, being someone official/in uniform may well hold more weight with your Mum, (no offence to yourself, but it may make her sit up and take notice!)

Perhaps asking to see her letters and mentioning to her that these are scams that are being investigated, and she should send no money etc. etc.

Police spend time speaking to kids when they first get into trouble, in a bid to deter them in future, why not an elderly person? I know it doesn't always work but you've nothing to lose.

Good luck

Loobysaver

I would dig out all the info you can find on some of these scams and show your mother.

Also the idea about getting someone out to speak to your mother is good, trading standards or the police.

What an awful situation to be in.

whitewing

Is your mum religious (or eg a lapsed christian?) If so, you could possibly have a confidential word with your local vicar, or the hospital chaplain. They could then see her because they'd heard she was poorly...and take it from there. Again, like the police, they may carry more weight by being a new, and therefore interesting, person and 'official'. They may also know of clubs or coffee mornings your mum could pootle along to. She may be able to keep things a little more in perspective if she is meeting other people for limited periods of time.

whitewing

Also, I don't know if Social Services could give you any pointers. She must be vulnerable if she is falling for these scams.

Threewheeler

Thought about getting Power of Attorney, need to go through a Solicitor os CAB thought as the law has changed on POA lately.
This way you could keep bulk of Mothers money safely away from temptation. a big decision not to be taken litely.

jay_cee_2

really sorry to hear about this.
i´m afraid I can´t offer any advice, I am sat here really wound up about all these scammers and things. They make me sick.

dzug

Threewheeler wrote: »

Thought about getting Power of Attorney, need to go through a Solicitor os CAB thought as the law has changed on POA lately.
This way you could keep bulk of Mothers money safely away from temptation. a big decision not to be taken litely.

Not on.

You can't do it without either her permission or convincing a court that the has lost her faculties. They will take a lot of convincing, particularly as she hasn't.

briona

bookduck wrote: »

...but she will not let me re-direct the mail as she enjoys the thrill of opening it up and the £2,500,000 cheque. ..... Then comes the depression.

Mental capacity is out of the question, she is very well with it.

Much of the problem is too much free time, unsocial and no friends.

Hi Bookduck

Two things in your post stood out for me (in red above). From what you've said, she appears a little lonely, and the highlight of many a day seems to be opening the post. Therefore, rather than trying to reason with her over the letters, what about trying a different tack?!

Since she likes opening post, have you considered a penfriend? My mum writes to prisoners in America, not sure if it's the site she uses, but there's a link below. Being prisoners, they are extremely grateful for the mail and tend to reply quite quickly. You can write to as many or as few as you wish as well.

http://www.writeaprisoner.com/InmateAds.aspx

Alternatively, she could sponsor a child. That way if she feels the need to send a postal order anywhere, it is at least being put to good use. I think most of the sponsored child sites send you letters and photos from your child...

http://www.actionaid.org.uk/100044/child_sponsorship.html
http://www.plan-uk.org/becomeasponsor/?gclid=COHun7iy0pACFQSIMAod6k65Og

I know these don't address the issue of throwing all her money at scammers, but perhaps a distraction is what she needs to lose interest in them?

Hope that helps.

Briona

Becles

Sorry to hear of your problems.

There is nothing that the postman can do. They legally have to deliver to the address on the envelope. If the postman was found to be keeping the junk mail from your mother, he would be charged with delaying the mail and would lose his job.

We had similar problems with my Grandpa except it was charity donations especially the ones with pictures of sick children, abandoned puppies and that kind of thing. You must get known as a regular donator, as he used to get different appeals nearly every day. He was sending a fortune off in donations, and then sitting at home with his coat on and not eating as he didn't have enough money left for food and heating!

My Dad got a mail redirection and power of attorney for him, but this will be difficult if your mother is adament she doesn't want this to happen.

She does sound a bit lonely if the post is the highlight of her day. Could you have a word with social services and see if they can recommend anything? We're in touch with them as my Gran has dementia, but they have managed to get her into old people's day clubs on three days of the week, which keeps her busy and she gets fed there. Also would meals on wheels help? Someone calling in with food and a quick chat might be something to look forward to instead of the post.

You could set up subscriptions for some magazines like Take A Break. They have loads of competitions in, and it'll only cost her the price of a stamp to enter them.