Money Moral Dilemma: Should we buy a second-hand gift for our young relative?

TheRaffs

Try not to make it a drama-  just get vouchers if you’re happy to do that regardless of the other gift? Less drama for a happy life! Children don’t care. As a Nanna of 5 I usually ask parents for advice  if I’m dubious but equally I just get them something if I see it. I buy second hand clothes and puzzles etc from charity shops. They are all very respectful of my budget. 

kimwp

Maybe stop buying each others' children presents in this zero sum situation. You buy for your kids, they buy for theirs.

DodgeDhanda

You could do 1 of 2 things.
1) Do buy him extensions of the gits the cousins existing toys e.g. The Mystery Machine to go with other Scooby Doo figures he may have already or 
2) Get your sons cousin some second hand gift cards lol.
Serious note I suggest you do the same as aunt. It's not good for the kids if one gets used toys ( perfectly fine thing to do for your own kids ) & the one with the vouchers is bought spanking brand new toys paid for by gift vouchers.

3) I've always gone down the route of buying educational toys or books. But that was me helping nephews & nieces to be better at things. 

Chris_Jay

My granddaughter wanted a particular playstation for her birthday last year, and the only way to get it was second hand, which she knew. I bought it, the shop staff made sure it was clean and in good working order, had it wrapped beautifully and I gave it it to a very happy girl. She'd had her heart set on it, it was discontinued but she didn't mind, and still loves it now.
My story won't necessarily resonate with anyone else but I'm telling it to say that second hand isn't about being cheap, or uncaring about the child, but practical at a time when people are struggling financially but want their children to have a happy day anyway.
Just don't be petty with the choice you make. There might be things you don't know about the aunt's financial life.

Pollycat

MSE_Laura_F said:

This week's MoneySaver who wants advice asks...

Our little boy's birthday is coming up, and his auntie says she's going to get him some toys he wants second-hand from an online marketplace for his present. We don't have any problem with that, as we've done the same in the past, but she's always expected us to get gift vouchers for his cousin when their birthday comes round. Should we follow her lead and buy something second-hand instead?

Really?
You want to play tit-for-tat over children's birthday presents...?

I really think these MMDs are scraping the barrel now.

Rob5342

It seems quite simple to me, I'd get people something they wanted and spend the same amount on them all to keep it fair.