Adapting to retirement

katejo

westv said:

I am envious of those over 60 in London that get free travel wherever they want to go in the capital.

Only off peak (after 9 or 9.30 depending on type of transport). 

mark55man

I am envious of those in a city with such flexible travel (free or not).  Our town does OK but it has to be planned and not that resilient when things go wrong

Sarahspangles

kimwp said:

I read somewhere that the key to friendship was rituals. Not in a chalk drawings and candles way,

I’ll strike ‘form a coven’ off my list then!

sgx2000

Sarahspangles said:

kimwp said:

I read somewhere that the key to friendship was rituals. Not in a chalk drawings and candles way,

I’ll strike ‘form a coven’ off my list then!

Lol.........

thriftytracey

MarzipanCrumble said:

u3a is what the members make it as it is run by the members.  I would suggest it is worth a google search to check what u3a offers in your location - 'town u3a' and see what comes up.  

Bristol is amazing:  https://bristol.u3asite.uk/groups/  
150 + interest groups  
Even Caldicot (small town by Severn Bridge) has a number of groups
https://u3asites.org.uk/caldicot/groups

u3atown does have a Committee and minutes - it is a requirement of the Charities Commission

I joined the U3A when I retired aged 59.  What I found is that some groups weren't what I expected.  For example I joined the poetry and music appreciation groups.  I thought it would be about discussing the poetry and music.  What I found was the the poetry members simply read out poems and there was no discussion.  The music appreciation was the same - listening to CD's and no discussion.  I left those groups.

Also, I found, even now I am 64, is that the majority of members are in their late 70's and 80's.  I feel an odd one out and there are generational differences, (not always bad), but I often feel an odd one out with different opinions and life experiences and having grown up at a different time.

It is a small town U3A - not a large town or city.  I expect the quality of the groups reflects the demographics.

marycanary

I retired at the end of March 2023, I still feel like I am on holiday. I do everything I used to do while on leave from work but more so, Holidays at home and abroad, hobbies, meeting friends, helping older and younger members of the family, gardening, DIY, reading, walking, researching topics of interest, days out and more. Some days if the weather is bad or I feel like it, I stay in and listen to audiobooks or old series on 4 extra. I haven't felt the need to volunteer, join a group/club or return to part-time work. I'm never bored, which is more than I can say about work.

Shortly after I retired, a friend's husband told me I would feel the need to get a routine.  Well, I've had routines imposed on me since I was 5 years old and I don't want one, self imposed or not now I have a choice.  I didn't retire to anything specific, I go with the flow and enjoy myself. Perhaps it's because I am single that I feel free to do what I want. I worked hard raising a family and building a career, all that pressure and stress is behind me. Now I do as I please, 

To anyone on the cusp of retirement, I say enjoy yourself, follow your inclinations and throw away the idea that you have to live up to anyone else's idea of what a retired person should or shouldn't do. 

pterri

marycanary said:

I retired at the end of March 2023, I still feel like I am on holiday. I do everything I used to do while on leave from work but more so, Holidays at home and abroad, hobbies, meeting friends, helping older and younger members of the family, gardening, DIY, reading, walking, researching topics of interest, days out and more. Some days if the weather is bad or I feel like it, I stay in and listen to audiobooks or old series on 4 extra. I haven't felt the need to volunteer, join a group/club or return to part-time work. I'm never bored, which is more than I can say about work.

Shortly after I retired, a friend's husband told me I would feel the need to get a routine.  Well, I've had routines imposed on me since I was 5 years old and I don't want one, self imposed or not now I have a choice.  I didn't retire to anything specific, I go with the flow and enjoy myself. Perhaps it's because I am single that I feel free to do what I want. I worked hard raising a family and building a career, all that pressure and stress is behind me. Now I do as I please, 

To anyone on the cusp of retirement, I say enjoy yourself, follow your inclinations and throw away the idea that you have to live up to anyone else's idea of what a retired person should or shouldn't do. 

Sage advice, I’m both bored AND stressed at work which is quite a combination. If I’m only bored it will be an improvement! (I won’t be bored)


also, having a routine imposed on you, that rings true. Having to go to school, work etc five days a week. I get that it’s just the way the world is but I’ll have no issue leaving it behind. 

BikingBud

katejo said:

westv said:

I am envious of those over 60 in London that get free travel wherever they want to go in the capital.

Only off peak (after 9 or 9.30 depending on type of transport). 

Why would you want to travel at peak time though?

I am jealous of the free facility but not too bothered about London, although it is a major inequality with people outside the grand metropolis.  

My father, some way beyond 60, has and continues to exploit the free bus pass in and around N England, seeing how far he can get in a day. Save power on heating and lighting, keep warm on long distance buses, visit different towns and locations.

P933alilli

Retired a few years ago , now 60.

  The worst bit is losing parents and a friend i grew up with and a neighbour. Wanting to do stuff, having time and enough money but no-one to do it with.

zagfles

marycanary said:

I retired at the end of March 2023, I still feel like I am on holiday. I do everything I used to do while on leave from work but more so, Holidays at home and abroad, hobbies, meeting friends, helping older and younger members of the family, gardening, DIY, reading, walking, researching topics of interest, days out and more. Some days if the weather is bad or I feel like it, I stay in and listen to audiobooks or old series on 4 extra. I haven't felt the need to volunteer, join a group/club or return to part-time work. I'm never bored, which is more than I can say about work.

Shortly after I retired, a friend's husband told me I would feel the need to get a routine.  Well, I've had routines imposed on me since I was 5 years old and I don't want one, self imposed or not now I have a choice.  I didn't retire to anything specific, I go with the flow and enjoy myself. Perhaps it's because I am single that I feel free to do what I want. I worked hard raising a family and building a career, all that pressure and stress is behind me. Now I do as I please, 

To anyone on the cusp of retirement, I say enjoy yourself, follow your inclinations and throw away the idea that you have to live up to anyone else's idea of what a retired person should or shouldn't do. 

Yup - some people may want to retire "to" something specific, but you don't have to. Some may want to treat retirement as an adventure where you explore new things before deciding what to do, you will find something that interests you. I had some vague ideas about what I'd be doing in retirement but they've gone completely out of the window as I've found other stuff to do. 

I don't think being single or married should make much difference, I'm married but almost none of the new stuff my wife and I have been doing since retirement has been together, we've found completely separate new interests. Which for us is great, we were used to being apart for work, so why shouldn't we be apart doing our own hobbies, and we spend more time together now than we did while working full time.

And like you say above, ignore other peoples' ideas of what retirement should be. Some people seem to think married couples should be tied at the hip and can't understand them doing stuff separately. My wife has been called a "bridge widow" because I spend about 10 hours a week playing bridge, strange she wasn't called a "work widow" when I spent 40 hours a week at work! We're both happy doing our own stuff, we're not going to conform to other peoples' expectations.