Carer Element/Premium added to ESA

xxxxxxxx

Just a couple of thing from me...
What I ask of OPs on this board is always to help the OP, I ask things which are outside of the OPs question but which are nevertheless related, because I take the opportunity to help an OP as much as I can. (I do not think I did this in this thread). And often "regular board members" appear to chastise me for asking irrelevant questions, to which, I do take umbrage (I am only human too).  It annoys me to have to justify my questions and or advice. Not to an OP, I will explain to an OP all day long, but to other board members.

I am not a "regular" here, I thought you were one of those "regulars" chastising me. I usually tend to steer clear of this place because I get fed up with people, holding me to account, for the things I say to an OP, which, I understand, in their eyes, they feel they have a responsibility to do, to protect an OP from poor advice. But to me, it usually just shows they do not understand why my questions are legitimate.  I also sometimes leave an argument I know I can win because it is too much to have to deal with (to the detriment of the OP).

I too do not know everything, I add caution to my comments in areas I know I am lacking. And I probably have made mistakes too.  

I was frustrated by you on this and other threads here I replied to, I hope my explanation goes someway to showing you why that was the case... if you felt my replies were attacking you.  

If you have good experience in some areas and you are willing to give your time, I would hope you do stay on. 

In this particular visit here, I have probably been here about a week or 2 now and I will probably be leaving too, but I will likely return for more punishment from the regulars in 6 months or a year from now.

marcia_

xxxxxxxx said:

Just a couple of thing from me...
What I ask of OPs on this board is always to help the OP, I ask things which are outside of the OPs question but which are nevertheless related, because I take the opportunity to help an OP as much as I can. (I do not think I did this in this thread). And often "regular board members" appear to chastise me for asking irrelevant questions, to which, I do take umbrage (I am only human too).  It annoys me to have to justify my questions and or advice. Not to an OP, I will explain to an OP all day long, but to other board members.

I am not a "regular" here, I thought you were one of those "regulars" chastising me. I usually tend to steer clear of this place because I get fed up with people, holding me to account, for the things I say to an OP, which, I understand, in their eyes, they feel they have a responsibility to do, to protect an OP from poor advice. But to me, it usually just shows they do not understand why my questions are legitimate.  I also sometimes leave an argument I know I can win because it is too much to have to deal with (to the detriment of the OP).

I too do not know everything, I add caution to my comments in areas I know I am lacking. And I probably have made mistakes too.  

I was frustrated by you on this and other threads here I replied to, I hope my explanation goes someway to showing you why that was the case... if you felt my replies were attacking you.  

If you have good experience in some areas and you are willing to give your time, I would hope you do stay on. 

In this particular visit here, I have probably been here about a week or 2 now and I will probably be leaving too, but I will likely return for more punishment from the regulars in 6 months or a year from now.

 Why do you feel you shouldn't be held to account for what you say? 

Danien

xxxxxxxx said:

Just a couple of thing from me...
What I ask of OPs on this board is always to help the OP, I ask things which are outside of the OPs question but which are nevertheless related, because I take the opportunity to help an OP as much as I can. (I do not think I did this in this thread). And often "regular board members" appear to chastise me for asking irrelevant questions, to which, I do take umbrage (I am only human too).  It annoys me to have to justify my questions and or advice. Not to an OP, I will explain to an OP all day long, but to other board members.

I am not a "regular" here, I thought you were one of those "regulars" chastising me. I usually tend to steer clear of this place because I get fed up with people, holding me to account, for the things I say to an OP, which, I understand, in their eyes, they feel they have a responsibility to do, to protect an OP from poor advice. But to me, it usually just shows they do not understand why my questions are legitimate.  I also sometimes leave an argument I know I can win because it is too much to have to deal with (to the detriment of the OP).

I too do not know everything, I add caution to my comments in areas I know I am lacking. And I probably have made mistakes too.  

I was frustrated by you on this and other threads here I replied to, I hope my explanation goes someway to showing you why that was the case... if you felt my replies were attacking you.  

If you have good experience in some areas and you are willing to give your time, I would hope you do stay on. 

In this particular visit here, I have probably been here about a week or 2 now and I will probably be leaving too, but I will likely return for more punishment from the regulars in 6 months or a year from now.

I did feel attacked, there is a bit of protectionism among the regulars, but not any different to regulars on other boards, they're all pretty much the same.

But I accept what you've said and don't have animosity. You obviously reacted that way due to your own issues, but as you can see I only have a few hundred posts.

I've had bad experiences on other sites too. Giving advice on an area I have some knowledge on makes me feel useful, given I'm mostly housebound.

I say things as I see it. Sometimes I'm wrong, sometimes I miss things and I do appreciate it when others point it out because I am fallible, like we all are.

I have noticed that sometimes the discussion between board members can cause the OP to switch off and not come back. So the reason I said something to you, is just to try to keep things as easy as possible for the OP.

MSE_JC

Hi everyone.

I'd just like to post a general reminder about the following sections of the Forum's rules:

This is a space to share, discuss and hopefully inform and improve your financial wellbeing, and while we encourage discussion and debate, we value this Forum as being friendly and safe above all else.

Be kind and respectful of all your fellow MoneySavers. You never know when they can help.

It's OK to disagree, but be civil, keep your tone friendly and don't be aggressive or make personal attacks on other members of the community. Before you post, think, 'could what I have written be read as unfriendly and upset someone?' and/or, 'how might this be perceived/make someone feel?'.

We want this Forum to be a safe and encouraging place for people to share their experience and information relating to all things MoneySaving. Abusive, manipulative and passive-aggressive behaviour is unacceptable, as is being provocative for the sake of it. Put that energy into MoneySaving instead.

https://www.moneysavingexpert.com/site/forum-faqs/

Our Forum is intended to be a welcoming space for MoneySavers, whether they've been a member for years or have only just signed up. Some of the discussion, information and insight shared on it has a massive impact on people's financial situations - in some cases it may have changed their lives. The tone of those discussions matters. A community like this doesn't work if people don't treat each other with kindness - something that we ask all of ours users to bear in mind when posting.

Thanks,

MSE JC