Money Moral Dilemma: Should my partner pay towards furnishing and decorating my new house?

Northern_Bloke

They always sound awful when we hear about them , but I would recommend you draw up a legal 'pre-nup ' type of agreement while early into the relationship. His IVA status could suggest financial recklessness or misfortune, until this is cleared keep your finances separate. It may not feel like a good basis on which to start out together,  but better to sort it now, if he's sincere he will understand.

SStitanic

Decorating is about tase, has he got any? Roll on 2 years time and he’s bringing home a lot of old junk from car boots and trying to furnish his packs of Taste and your dilemma will be completely changed

lil_homer

I bought my house before I met my partner so when he moved in I got a home protection trust. If we split up the house remains mine (even if we marry) and he can take any furniture etc that was his and we’ll divide anything jointly owned.  He contributes towards bills etc. if we decorate I pay the lions share but he sometimes contributes. I view it as, if he was living in a private rented then he’d pay to decorate etc. but I wouldn’t expect him to pay for renovation unless he offered to. He gets to live in a much bigger and nicer house than if he was on his own. It works for us so just have an open discussion and come to an agreement that suits you both. Ultimately if you plan to pay for everything 50/50, the only reason it’s in your name is because of his IVA and you would have an equal share if you were to split then he should pay for half. If that wouldn’t be the plan and you want to keep the house 100% yours then the responsibility to pay for any work done should be yours as well. 

Dahlia1008

So the house is in your name because your partner has poor credit, but assume they will be living in this house and using it as their own? I’d suggest you speak to your partner regarding decoration and see if they have any interest in the subject, if they have preferences that are agreeable, they could either contribute to either the purchases or the DIY, if they will benefit from having a house they can treat as their own, what’s the harm in having a conversation? As for furnishings, again if they don’t care about decor or furnishings then make your house, your home. If it’s for items that are mutually beneficial, washer/fridge/tv’s etc then you just need to be prepared if a split does happen down the line, you won’t be keeping everything. I’ve unfortunately been in this situation a number of times and even with a joint mortgage, I still pay for the bulk of decoration and furnishings because if I didn’t my house would be bare and in total disrepair, due to my incredibly tight partner! 

Redundolita

Your mortgage lender will want you to have your partner sign a declaration that if your home is repossessed, they will leave quietly and have no right of residence. You MUST declare to your lender that another adult will live in the property with you. It's called consent to mortgage, which sounds rum for saying that your partner will not have any ownership rights, but there you go. Your lender will also do a credit search for your partner and their IVA will be evident, so there may be other hoops for you to jump through. He has proved himself untrustworthy so far as lenders are concerned: I hope his finances are on a more even keel now. He should pay whatever he was paying as rent in his previous accommodation, potentially more if your new home is larger or has better amenities. Given the IVA, I would want a legal arrangement drawn up in your mocassins. Don't let love blind you.

squirrel59

Here's a thought: why don't you just discuss it with him? If you've been together for four years, surely you've got some kind of communication going? If not, I suggest you end the relationship.

Jason9091

My first question is: What did your partner say when you discussed this issue?

JayD

I would suggest that you discuss this with him and maybe agree that:

If he pays half towards any chattels, you have written verification of that fact, signed by you both. 

Or If he doesn't pay half towards them, then advise him that you ensure everything is in your name and clearly recorded in you financial statements.

Decorating, I would hope you would both be sharing - both in choices and costs.

It would be helpful to research the legal rights of co-habitees who can prove they contribute financially too.

Either way, these are things you should BOTH be discussing these things together and coming to arrangements that suit you both.