Can this be fair? How how would you go about it?

SuseOrm

This is the other issue, and I will admit the reason why we split up. I just wanted to say if I’m honest whether or not I should’ve done differently or if there was anything I could’ve learnt from the situation and actually I don’t think I would’ve done anything differently. .  

He was tighter than a fish, his !!!!!! when it came to spending money on his own children. I ended up buying his little boy haircuts, paying for days out etc because his argument would be that he wouldn’t have gone on the days out if it wasn’t for the fact that I was there with my son, encouraging his son to want to have days out.  

Anything that wasn’t needed, i.e. the kids shoes are falling off their feet. He wouldn’t pay for that was to come from his mothers child support which she clearly couldn’t afford to spend.  

By the end of the relationship, the red flags were just covering his body from top to bottom. It looked like a Communist party convention 

AskAsk

SuseOrm said:

This is the other issue, and I will admit the reason why we split up. I just wanted to say if I’m honest whether or not I should’ve done differently or if there was anything I could’ve learnt from the situation and actually I don’t think I would’ve done anything differently. .  

He was tighter than a fish, his !!!!!! when it came to spending money on his own children. I ended up buying his little boy haircuts, paying for days out etc because his argument would be that he wouldn’t have gone on the days out if it wasn’t for the fact that I was there with my son, encouraging his son to want to have days out.  

Anything that wasn’t needed, i.e. the kids shoes are falling off their feet. He wouldn’t pay for that was to come from his mothers child support which she clearly couldn’t afford to spend.  

By the end of the relationship, the red flags were just covering his body from top to bottom. It looked like a Communist party convention 

finance is always a difficult one between two partners if both have money.  split of 50/50 sounds fair but may not be, if one partner spends a lot or uses more than the other one.  one of you have to decide to subsidise the other one.

i am getting divorced now and i am not going to live with anyone else in future.  i am going to live on my own, and i am going to find a partner, where they stay in their own property and i stay in my own, and we just stay at each others.  simple, no one is going to ask for rent and we don't have to stay at each other if we are not welcome.